...to ask something small, that you wish you could ask your late Mum (or other loved one) from when you were a child?

[WeLovetoBoogieonaSaturdayNight]

(So, just a little diversion from all the turmoil lately.)

There was a perfume of my mother's, that I can still recall, even "smell" in my mind, from my earliest memories when I was a child.
The bottle was not on my mum's dresser, after I was old enough to become aware of her collection. And she never wore it again.
I remember and know all of the fragrances that were there, from when I was six or so.
This particular one, though, was a lovely fragrance she must've had from when I was an infant or toddler. It was still detectable (to me) on some of her scarves, when I was around five years old.
Recently, after a couple of years of searching, I think I've finally found what it was (!), but I can't confirm it with my mum.
Or my dad.
(I'm pretty sure my father would have bought it for her.)
My Mum died three years ago; and my Dad, five years ago.
So, it's something I'll never know
...and really wish I did!
Of course there are many other larger things that I wish I could ask them...
but for starters, I wish I knew this.
What is your small thing that you wish you could ask your Mum, or other loved one, about a memory from your childhood?

Maybe about a cuddly toy, or game, or song?
A recipe? A certain shop? A story?
(I have several of these, as well!)

Her ginger cake recipe. I've come close but it's not right....

@Nosenseofhumour
Ohhhh Ginger Cake!
Try to think of jars of things she always had around...
she may have plopped a spoonful of jam in, or something.

I loved my mum's cooking, and really loved her beef stew, but now I can't remember if she coated the beef cubes in flour/corn starch before she browned the beef.
Not that it really matters, I suppose - just wish I could remember.

i remember my mum wore Tweed but when i gave her a kiss goodbye for school in the morning her face powder had a lovely smell that lingered for ages.
id just like to be a better daughter to her and say sorry i love you
my wonderful mum photo

I can't think of anything specific or appropriate to the thread though I wish I could pick up the phone and talk to DM one more time.

meant to say she was only 62 when she left us

I understand OP, the same happened with my sis sister. She used a perfume when I was a child that was lovely on her. She can’t remember what it was and I’ve never been able to find out.

Certain smells, like the smell of cherry blossoms or mint really take me back to childhood.

id just like to be a better daughter to her and say sorry i love you Please try change your mindset. I'm sure you were a lovely DD we all make fuck ups. I wasn't the best DD in my teens or even 20's I'd major fuck ups.
No matter what my DD does to me I'd hate her to feel guilt, I'd want her to know I understand she had issues but all is forgiven. Guilt will tear you down, she wouldn't want that.

Not what you asked but I'd love to know what her career hopes were once she went back to work after being home for us. I was the youngest and she died when i was 13 and she was dipping her toe back into working. she had a PhD in bioscience.

also would have loved to have seen how well she would have got on with my mil. they would have had lots in common.

More about parenting. My mum died when I was 23 and I just feel that I know nothing about her experiences of looking after us when we were small. I'd give anything to be able to talk to her now and have her guidance and advice, and what she found easy and hard. I also wish I knew more about her life before we were born.

I'd ask my Grandma why she didn't pursue a career in theatre - she was an amazing producer and did Am Dram for years, she was honestly a powerhouse. I wonder if she felt it was out of her league or whether it was the chains of being a wife and mother.

I'd ask my Grandad about the war, I tried to a few times and my Grandma ended the conversation saying "you don't want to hear about all that".... I think he would have spoken to me honestly but he was quite scared of her, we all were

My dad died when I was 21 and like sun I feel he died before I could know him as a person (rather than "just" a parent) so there are lots of chats I'd love to have but for this thread I think I will choose his pancake recipe and his microwave jam roly-poly recipe.

I can make both and get compliments on my pancakes but neither compare!

Infact when my dad made pancakes and let friends know he was people used to drop other things to specifically come round for them

I'd ask my dgp's about our family tree.
We have hundreds of old photographs from their house and I'd love to know who some of the people are on them.
They all looked so happy and so beautiful.

This is lovely. My mum died when I was 3, I honestly wouldn't have a clue where to start asking her anything. I know when she was ill she was very upset at the prospect of leaving her children motherless so young, and no one would talk to her honestly about it, I guess I would ask if she felt at peace that we had turned out more or less ok in the end.

I wish I'd asked my mum more about what it was like losing her own mum. It was only after my mum died I understood the depth of the loss of your mum, no matter what the relationship was like.
The one person I want to talk to about what the grief like is her, which is impossible. God, it strikes less and less but when that flash of grief hits it feels like I've just lost her.

I was actually thinking about this ,I am adopted and both my lovely mum and dad died recently. Although I always knew I was adopted we never really talked about it as such , I think because I didn't want to hurt their feelings and now they have gone I feel as if I will never really know about my start in life and my first few months after being adopted and I feel as if I now have this massive gap missing from my life as well as dealing with losing my lovely mum and dad. Some lovely stories on this post .

I'd ask for her recipe for meat and potato pie. She made it in a huge bowl, with a thick pastry top. It was delicious. I miss my mum, so much

@whatthefunk I came on exactly to say the same thing. I can make it, but there's something about the pie my gran and mum made that I just can't replicate.

I'd also tell her that she was right when she tried to suggest I'd be good in nursing/medicine - I work in an office and wish I'd listened to her. Bit too late to retrain now.

I would like to ask my mum what me and my bros were like when we were newborn. I have a 4 month old DD and really gutted my mum will never meet her.

I'd like to ask my grandmother what her childhood was like.

@chockaholic72 my mum only used 4 or 5 ingredients, tinned stewing steak, potatoes, carrots and onions and a shit tonne of black pepper..... I just can't get it right....

Oh god...am crying reading this...what a nice idea for a thread. For me....so many questions about motherhood...my mum died weeks before my first was born and there were a million and one things in those early days that I wished I could have asked her. Even after a few year things still pop up occasionally when I think...gosh I wish I could ask my mum about this and that. Most recently my eldest was asking about extended family and I realised I didn’t know where my own grandparents (who died long before I was born) were born. Such a simple question...I feel like I should know but I also think how much my m would have loved to sit her granddaughter (my DD) on her knee and regale her with stories of her grandparents (while no doubt surreptitiously feeding her childcare buttons!)

Chocolate buttons...not childcare buttons! That would be weird

Lovely thread. I miss my mum every day. We had a lot of laughs. for everyone.