To think if you can keep your kids off school beyond September, you should?

[user8558]

Firstly I want to make absolutely clear that by "can" I mean people in similar circumstances to myself. I've no job anymore due to coronavirus, my industry will be one of the last to find its feet so I'm likely unemployed for the forseeable. Fortunately my partner is able to cover bills etc with his income.

I'm a bit wary of schools going back in August. For me it feels too soon.

However, I also know it's not soon enough for many other families. That working parents are struggling and for many other reasons kids are really missing school.

Am I being unreasonable then in thinking perhaps that people like myself, with nothing better to do anyway (and have the mental resources) are doing everyone else a favour by keeping our kids home to make life easier for teachers and other kids trying to manage in cramped schools? To make social distancing in the classroom easier for those who need and want to be there.

But what I'm most concerned about is the abnormality of it

It's not going back to school normally

It's going out to place where infection control measures are in place. It's so far from normal

My year 1 is back. She’s loving it. She says it’s better than ‘normal’ school because they have smaller groups so less people messing around and more attention from the teacher. Other than eating lunch at their desks and not being able to bring books home there aren’t any significant differences that she has noticed.
Are you imagining that they’re all sitting in chalked out squares?

I think it's up to you. Your child, your choice. I have serious doubts they'll be back by then but if they are I'll be sending mine in.
Technically I can keep them off as I'll be on maternity leave but I think secondary school children need to go back ASAP.
However if your child is happy and doing well then I don't see why you can't keep them at home.
I think parents will have a choice about sending their children in at least in the short term.

YABU

because soon we will go back on SAHM bashing!

I am completely against blind reopening, but after all, each child is allowed to have the same access, regardless of the status of their parents.

My husband is furloughed and I only work two days a week (one of which is over the weekend) and we still sent our 6 year old back to school when it opened.

Children need to be around other children.

And the quality of home schooling is not the same as the quality that face to face teaching can provide.

Our 6 year old was doing brilliantly with his home schooling and we had no practical reason to send him back (due to our work circumstances) but we sent him back because children deserve to be with their friends and they deserve a proper education.

He is so, so happy about being back at school - all the children are. It may be not in the way that is ‘normal’ for them, but staying shut indoors isn’t normal either.

Their outside world isn’t ‘normal’ either, not seeing family isn’t normal, not going to the park isn’t normal, not going on days out and having fun isn’t normal either....but it’s just the situation we are in.

If I’m honest, allowing my son to go back to school is probably the most ‘normal’ thing he has done in many months.

No, I think plans should be made that enable all children to go back to school, even if that means fewer hours for each child and more work at home. I think people in your situation should be looking for new jobs or retraining. I don't know what sector you work in but are you sure you sector will just get back to normal? And if it does how employable will you be after a break of 6 months or a year?

Far from being unreasonable I think you are being very sensible. If I had kids at school I wouldn't send them back before September but accept some parents have to.

I see your point but if this means your child is going to miss out on their education compared to their peers by not going back to school then that hardly seems fair on your child.

If I’m honest, allowing my son to go back to school is probably the most ‘normal’ thing he has done in many months

Agreed. After her first day back my 6 year old said... ‘I didn’t realise how much I’d missed my friends until I saw them again’ and ‘I’m so glad things are going back to normal’. 4 year old is desperate to go back on Monday. Along with now being able to see my mum properly (who lives alone), they’re both starting to feel ‘normal’ again. Now just for playgrounds to open!

@Lynda07

Far from being unreasonable I think you are being very sensible. If I had kids at school I wouldn't send them back before September but accept some parents have to.

I don’t have to but have sent them anyway

I think the virus will be dangerous again later in the year so I can see the logic behind wanting to keep children home and safe, but the reality is that they thrive with companionship and the social aspect of a good school is so beneficial to their wellbeing.

Maybe it depends on the age of your children? I'm happy for mine to stay off until September but then I have one starting sixth form. There is no way I can teach her the subjects she has chosen and some of it will be impossible for her to do at home. Her GCSEs are already fucked, I don't want her A Levels to be fucked in 2 years time because she can only do half the curriculum.

@user8558

If it would be disastrous for your child then why on earth do you think you "can", clearly you that means you're not one of people who "can" - because it would be disastrous

Do you really think my AIBU is "should parents for whom it would be disastrous for their family keep their kids at home anyway"

Why are people so hell bent on deliberately misinterpreting this post.

Bored I guess.

You can’t ask if you’re being unreasonable then be offended when people think you are indeed being unreasonable.

People disagreeing with you doesn’t mean they are “deliberately misinterpreting” your post. We are all adults, we are allowed to disagree with you. You shouldn’t ask a question if you don’t want to hear the answer.

We are back on the "schools are not childcare".

Obviously school hours remove the need for childcare, but the point of school is not to get the kids out of the way.

Yes, schools opened exceptionally for childcare during the lockdown, but many didn't provide any education, some used the team from usual clubs, not even teachers.

It's meant well, but being at home is completely irrelevant in sending your children to school. It's about their own interest, not the convenience or the availability of the parents.

I think everybody should do what's best for them and their children with the resources they have available.

I don't think people should be expected to make huge lifestyle decisions just for the greater good of society.

I could give up work and not have a car and keep DD at hime. The roads would be less congested and DDs school would have one less child to worry about. But it wouldn't be in the best interests of our family.

If it's best for you to keep your child at home then you should be able to do that, and you should do it without expecting others in apparently the same circumstances to do the same.

You do you. I'll do me.

It's meant well, but being at home is completely irrelevant in sending your children to school. It's about their own interest, not the convenience or the availability of the parents

Exactly. I don’t send mine to school because I need them out of the way (I’ve been predominantly a SAHM for the past 2 years since the older 2 started school anyway, so always had the choice to home school had I wanted to). I send them to school because I believe school is in their best interests. So regardless of the fact that I am at home now, I still believe school to be in their best interests.

Do what you like dudes.

Do you think your child would be happy with this plan?

I'm torn on all of this. I want them to go back to school in September but I have a little guy who gets horrific chest infections and asthma and I have no idea what this winter will do to him.

No because I think it's better for children to be in school, being educated by teachers and people able to be around their friends.

I appreciate you are homeschooling but I don't think it really stands up to the level of education they'd receive at school.

And who is going to continue to provide all this work? I'm assuming you are working from work set by teachers and sent to you and you aren't just sourcing all the information yourself? Are they supposed to continue to do that whilst also teaching normally in a classroom?

I think the virus will be dangerous again later in the year so I can see the logic behind wanting to keep children home and safe, but the reality is that they thrive with companionship and the social aspect of a good school is so beneficial to their wellbeing.

This exactly!!!

And being able to be around their friends**

Ah dear OP, I could have predicted this would go exactly how it has done.

I'm in almost the same boat as you (although I'm working here and there when I want to) and that's exactly what my Reception age son hasn't gone back. Even one fewer student makes it easier to manage in school.

I can competently homeschool him, including planning his curriculum (which would be the case, in my particular situation, if he was anywhere up to Year 11 and potentially sixthform depending on which options he took), I'd be happy to do so without the school having to provide any resources - they still do at the moment though.

I think most parents probably wouldn't have my precise set of circumstances and if a child's mental health is deteriorating from being at home then school is obviously the best option.... but in the spirit of the OP I don't think it's unreasonable.

I am undecided on this.
What Covid19 data there is simply does not support the utterly disproportionate fear about it, so in an ideal world, I would want schools opened to all ASAP.
BUT we're living in odd times where people have been scaremongered into not wanting to leave their homes so I do wonder if it would be better to have an approach where any parent who doesn't want their child back must de-register and home educate, and teachers with concerns about going back can perhaps then help with that home education via online platforms.
Parents and teachers who want schools to educate children in the normal way ie in classrooms can go back. I would cert ainl

I would certainly want my DC back in school.