I'm a size 16 and I think I'm pretty hot

[MermaidApocalypse]

Just to even out the fat shaming on another thread. I'm a size 14-16. I can still fit in jeans I wore in sixth form college, I've always been this way. I have stayed a similar size through physical jobs, sedentary jobs, two pregnancies, breastfeeding, having a personal trainer, driving and sitting at a desk all day. I think that for some of us this is our healthy size.
Despite this I have to acknowledge the science, excess calories minus insufficient exercise does cause weight gain. Saying that my GP isn't worried as I've not gained weight in a short space of time, I've stayed the same for 16 years. I did once get down to a 12 but I had to try so hard, 18 hour fasts, exercise four days a week. I know women who stay at a 12 doing sweet F.A!

The things that I hate hearing are that people who are a size 14 to 18 are unhealthy. My previous job was being the manager of a health food shop. I lifted boxes of dried pulses, nuts, oats all day every day. Twice a week the delivery van used to park two streets down and we would have to carry 40+ boxes back to the shop and up the stairs to the storeroom. Do you know how many skinny people couldn't do that, even once? I can lift 25kg without much effort, if the tits didn't get in the way, I'd make a good weightlifter!

I bet you feel hot. All that excess weight. I'm sweaty Betty in a size 12.

@potteryclass @pinktaxi I see the mean girls are out after they've had a few gins.
I don't need anyone else to tell me how I look, and I didn't make reference to anyone else finding me hot in my OP. It's how I feel that matters. I refuse to feel repulsion when I look at my body, which is what society (and MN) tells me I should feel. My body is amazing! It hasn't let me down yet.

People can be beautiful regardless of size and I think everyone has something special about them, something unique to them that makes them beautiful.

I am a size 12 so is my sil and we are the same height but I have wide hips and distribute my weight differently to her. She has more of a squat solid build all over whereas I have a smaller bust and waist but larger bum, thighs and hips. It's all relative! We are still both overweight for our height though.

A size 16 is overweight for someone who is 5ft 3 or shorter. If you are taller fair enough, if you are happy fair enough. It doesn't have any bearing on how 'hot' you are, clearly you have high self esteem and that is great.

I would just like to say that the other thread wasn't fat shaming and it wasn't praising being skinny.

It was more about maintaining a healthy weight, so not being overweight or obese.

In some Asian countries, overweight starts from BMI 23 and up. I would agree with that. I have put on 1/2 st over lockdown, and am now at BMI 22.8 which does feel high. I have fat all over, and my tummy has more from gaining the 7lb. I would love to get back to 8 1/2 st.

Size 14-16 is fat. If the person is very tall, then possibly not. I mean average or shorter people.

I would say that size 4-6 is slim, size 8-10 is normal. 12 is chubby then 14+ fat (overweight and as it goes up, then obese). I mean women of average or shorter height.

Non of your assessment takes into account body fat % though MrsKypp. BMI is a very blunt tool for those of us with high muscle mass 🙂

@waterlego

Non of your assessment takes into account body fat % though MrsKypp. BMI is a very blunt tool for those of us with high muscle mass 🙂

You are right, I hadn't, sorry!!!

Yes, if someone has lots of muscle, the sizing of their clothes and certainly BMI are of little to no use.

I do wish people would think if the damage they do before posting trite smug shit. Really if it was easy, we would all be size 8.

I swear I could drown puppies or hit an old lady over the head to steal her pension and if I was a size.10, I'd still be more acceptable on here to some than a fat person who had done none of these things.

As JK Rowling famously said, there are many worse things you can be than fat. Interestingly, I think shallow was one of them

didn't make reference to anyone else finding me hot in my OP. It's how I feel that matters.

It's not really about how you feel. The important thing is health and being overweight puts you at a higher risk of many many things than someone of a healthy weight.

I refuse to feel repulsion when I look at my body, which is what society (and MN) tells me I should feel. My body is amazing! It hasn't let me down yet.

Nobody is suggesting you should feel repulsed at your body, and while it may not have let you down, the yet at the end of your sentence is key.

@carexfairex just listen to yourself 'it's not really about how you feel'... about my own body. I mean, if the way I feel about my own body isn't important then what is? I'm a size 14-16. I'm not a huge burden on the NHS, especially as I work in the NHS and see the real reason that it struggles financially on a daily basis.

There is a middle ground between 'uh I'm so fat and horrible, don't look at me' and 'woo hoo, I'm going to wear a bikini and drink milkshake through a feeding tube on Instagram.' I'm somewhere in the middle 'yes I am a little larger than I'd like, I'm doing my bit to fix it but there are way more important things going on, and I'm not going to feel ashamed.' The thread the other day made me feel bad as there were plenty of people on there, including the OP, saying that they judged those they knew on being overweight. That's awful!

just listen to yourself 'it's not really about how you feel'... about my own body. I mean, if the way I feel about my own body isn't important then what is?

Your health 🤷🏻‍♀️

How old are you op? You can carry extra weight and look good at 20/30/40, but when you get to 60 like me and my friends it doesn’t work. The overweight ones all have considerable health problems.
None of us at this age look hot and sexy, what woman of 60 does with a few notable exceptions. So it’s probably better to be healthy.

^^ this

@Fairyliz I am working on it, as I said before. I'm not getting any bigger, as I posted in my OP. I've been the same size since 17/18.

@carexfairex is it only my health you care about, or everyone's? Are you starting campaigns asking Morrison's why they sell 5 jam doughnuts for 50p yet one apple is 65p? Are you writing to your MP about air pollution? Are you giving blood regularly? Are you trying to introduce mandatory first aid to schools? Do you know where your nearest defibrillator is whenever you leave the house? Are you interested in the frequency of defibrillators in affluent areas compared to poorer ones? What are your thoughts on BAME having a lower life expectancy than white people in some parts oh the country?

Or does your concern for the health of the nation stop at calling someone else on MN?

I don't think you should feel repulsion but I do think you should acknowledge the extra strain you could put on healthcare systems even for simple things like you have a greater chance of breaking a bone for example due to lower percentage of bone density to mass, your own organs are already under more pressure layered with extra fat and as you get older it will catch up with you how unhealthy you actually are.
Its good you feel good but you may feel comfortable forever at that size but you can do better op. You can love your body and be healthy. You don't have to stay obese forever even if you convince yourself this is ok. It's not just you that is affected by this. Others may have to care for you one day if you don't get your weight down.

And CV itself has proven that being obese can put you at risk of death as well. This isn't just for CV either, you are also at a much higher risk of certain cancers while remaining obese. Obesity is a very common problem but there is help out there. It's not all about looks and how you feel right now.

is it only my health you care about, or everyone's? Are you starting campaigns asking Morrison's why they sell 5 jam doughnuts for 50p yet one apple is 65p? Are you writing to your MP about air pollution? Are you giving blood regularly? Are you trying to introduce mandatory first aid to schools? Do you know where your nearest defibrillator is whenever you leave the house? Are you interested in the frequency of defibrillators in affluent areas compared to poorer ones? What are your thoughts on BAME having a lower life expectancy than white people in some parts oh the country?

Well you are the one who made the thread so at this moment, yes, I am responding to you.

You said

The things that I hate hearing are that people who are a size 14 to 18 are unhealthy.

So I am talking to you, about that.

All the things you have mentioned have jack shit to do with me responding to your opinion on the health of size 14/18 people. Your rant is indicative of knowing your weight is not healthy though.

Or does your concern for the health of the nation stop at calling someone else on MN?

I wasn't 'calling' anyone whatever that means I was giving my opinion, about the very subject that you asked for opinions about.

I'm really struggling to understand why you are being so defensive here. You started the thread. In AIBU. Asking for opinions.

@carexfairex my rant is indicative of you being a twunt. What size are you by the way? Any health concerns? If you eat anything less than a raw vegan, non alcoholic diet then you are a hypocrite. Don't you know how bad that stuff is for you?
As I said, I work in healthcare, mental health to be exact. Do you know what's worse for the NHS than the odd size 14 being generally positive about their lives and appearance? People being unhappy, suicidal, self harming, abusing, even people spending long amounts of time on social media (oh the irony.) Much worse for the world than my enjoying a taco with sour cream and guac on a Friday night.
I know I'm fat, I'm not in denial. I didn't wake up and think what?! 14 stone, where did that come from? But the fact is that I am able to work, run, play football, dance to Dutty Wine at carnival, and I'm happy.
That matters to me, being happy and trying to do better each day.

my rant is indicative of you being a twunt.

Very mature

What size are you by the way? Any health concerns?

22/24. Several reasons to be concerned for my health, yes.

If you eat anything less than a raw vegan, non alcoholic diet then you are a hypocrite.

I'm not trying to be hypocritical. I wasn't actually trying to be critical at all. You posted that size 14-18 is healthy. It's not. I speak from experience, not a high horse.

I do park run (pre covid) and so many larger women overtake me. It’s really shown me that size doesn’t equal fitness/health. My slimmest friend has just completed couch to 5k and I’m really proud of her and know she found it really hard but is trying to keep it up. She says I’m her inspiration. On mn I’m probably seen as fat - size 12 but officially overweight (by 2lb) on the bmi chart. I run two 5ks a week and a 10k all at an average pace (I’m not a professional runner but my pace is enough for a good cardio workout). At the end of March I was due to run a half marathon and in my pre half recce run I completed it in 2 hours 10 minutes. However, I’ve been told I’m delusional before on here as size 12 is large and not the same as it was 15 years ago (although my clothes from 15 years ago still fit ).

Some people are naturally broader than others or have a larger base weight. Staying active and eating a balanced diet is more important than weightloss.

I'm a size 20 and gorgeous.

Malnutrition costs the nhs more than obesity and causes more complications post surgery.

@carexfairex oh ok, so you're one of those 'if I say how disgusting being fat is no one can use it against me as I've already pointed that out so I still get to feel superior' people. I've been there, I know. Being the first to mention how unhealthy I am to anyone that will listen so they might not sit there and judge me for being overweight. Yeah, that's not healthy either...

oh ok, so you're one of those 'if I say how disgusting being fat is no one can use it against me as I've already pointed that out so I still get to feel superior' people.

But I didn't say being fat was disgusting? I said it wasn't healthy. Which it isn't. I didn't say that to be superior, I said it because you posted on AIBU asking for peoples opinions.

I've been there, I know. Being the first to mention how unhealthy I am to anyone that will listen so they might not sit there and judge me for being overweight. Yeah, that's not healthy either...

I'm not judging you. I literally said you are wrong to say size 14-18 is healthy: it's not healthy. It's overweight. Overweight isn't healthy.

Why are you so angry at me? You literally asked for opinions on this?

I'm 5ft6ish, and can not get my head around the claim that people feel,healthier at a size 16. I'm very active, run, weight train and do yoga, and I know I wouldn't be able to move so well or fast if I was that size.
I eat to be fit, it's important to me. I also find athletic bodies attractive and feel good when I look fit. Oh, and I know women who are around a size 16, and I'm stronger and fitter than them.
Being slightly chubby is fine when you're under 30, but as you age, it leads to joint problems, and starts to impact your health.
I think it's high,y unlikely that someone can be a size 16 and fit. You may be attractive to some peo"e, but not healthy.

I posted something similar on "the other thread" but I think it's even more relevant here:

I think it's great that the OP has real body positivity. A person needs to be able to wake up in the morning and love themselves. This is key for everyone surely?!

However at what point (and this is a genuine question!) does body positivity become full denial of health risks? When does someone who is overweight or obese, get to that realisation without help?

I think that the food industry, the availability of convenience food, the culture of emotional eating, and the thing that's never mentioned on these threads (excessive alcohol consumption, a bottle of wine every other night)....these all make it very tough for people to remain within the BMI scale or any other calibration of body health. It makes sense then that people are going to be "stuck" at a weight, it's important to love oneself regardless.

It's just curious to me that does this kind of laudable and important self-love have an ultimate price somewhere along the line? Or should we as a society stop pushing for everyone to be within an 6-14 scale of dress sizes, and just recalibrate our thinking completely around bodies?