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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Learner driver with 1 year old in car

35 replies

Gimmecaffeine · 05/06/2020 22:28

I have been learning for 2 years and am test ready but awaiting a test. I have failed my driving test twice and urgently need more practice, but actually getting this in the lockdown is hard. I have had frequent lessons but can't help but feel I just need time behind the wheel now. I need to drive for my NHS job in a nursing role.

WIBU to drive with my baby in the car? I can't help but feel uneasy, but also think that if I passed tomorrow I could drive her solo which would be less safe.

OP posts:
Original poster
Gimmecaffeine · 05/06/2020 22:28

As in, less safe than with my DH being the supervising driver with me.

OP posts:
AGrownManMadeWager · 05/06/2020 22:30

I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to take a passenger if you're learning. You'll need to check the legality of it.

SomeoneElseEntirelyNow · 05/06/2020 22:35

I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to take a passenger if you're learning.

This is completely false. If you're in the UK, have a proper learners' permit and are being supervised by a licensed driver who meets all the criteria, then you can have passengers.

I passed my test while pregnant, driving w unborn DD felt very scary, but it was safe, and nothing bad happened.

slashlover · 05/06/2020 22:36

www.gov.uk/driving-lessons-learning-to-drive/practising-with-family-or-friends

It's legal, only you know OP if it would make you more nervous or distract you though.

abw94 · 05/06/2020 22:42

I wouldn't risk it. How awful would you feel if something bad happen?

Stefoscope · 05/06/2020 23:03

I wouldn't risk it. How awful would you feel if something bad happen? Passing your test is no guarantee you won't get into an accident though.

I would go for it if you're basically at test standard and are comfortable with your DH supervising. Maybe stick to routes you know and residential roads at quieter times until you feel comfortable with the car.

Juanmorebeer · 05/06/2020 23:06

Yeah I would do this. If you are test ready and feel confident enough. One time I had to take toddler dd on a lesson with me when her nursery had a training session thing on. That was in a dual control car with instructor though.

RandomMess · 05/06/2020 23:14

Surely it would be good to practice with DC in car so you are used to it when you pass?

curtainsforme · 05/06/2020 23:22

I did this all the time when I was learning. I had 2 under 2 and drive everywhere we went to get the practice in before my test.

Osirus · 05/06/2020 23:27

Of course you can. My instructor told me one of his students had all her kids in the back on lessons - she had no choice.

A one year old would be very distracting if it wasn’t asleep.

I dreaded driving for the first time on my own with my child (3) and planned on driving on my own for a few months first. I took her out straightaway and it was fine - she’s my driving buddy now.

barcodescanner · 05/06/2020 23:30

I took my dd on my lessons, that was with a driving instructor though. Don't think I would have without dual controls but I wasn't a confident learner

BankofNook · 05/06/2020 23:32

I took my DC on lessons with me too. The instructor didn't mind, she often had a good sleep in her carseat, and she was too young to repeat the swearing she heard Grin

Boom45 · 05/06/2020 23:35

I did it when I was learning. I was fine and very careful. The day I passed my test I wasnt magically more safe than the day before when I was practicing. It's not like I was driving 90 mph down the hard shoulder of the motorway while chugging white lightning, I was pootling about at 25 mph on quiet side roads while paying attention very hard. Obviously someone could've ploughed into the side of me or something but they could do that now too.

TippledPink · 05/06/2020 23:38

OH's DD (27) does this with her non driver boyfriend (35). He has never passed his test but drives their kids around all the time. With or without her supervising actually 🙄

Twigletfairy · 05/06/2020 23:40

I actually felt safer in my driving lessons than I did in the first couple of days of passing my test.

I guess it depends on why you failed your tests and how confident you feel. If you failed because you made massive, unsafe errors, then no I wouldn't. If it was things like hitting a curb during a manouever, and minor things, then I would consider it.

Mnthrowaway20202 · 05/06/2020 23:41

I guess it depends on the driving aspects that you urgently need practice with

JustTryingToGetThroughThis · 05/06/2020 23:41

I used to take my ds with me on my lessons. Completely legal

Starcup · 05/06/2020 23:42

I’m sure it will be fine OP. The driving instructor will stop you getting in to trouble on your part. As you say, you could pass test tomorrow and have an accident anyway.

It’ll put you in good practice! I passed about 17 years ago now and I drive about 400 miles a week. I have two kids so I’d say I’m a very experienced driver.

But f&ck me, there’s nowt like driving with 2 squarking squabbling kids in the back to keep your wits about you 😂 touch wood I passed 1st time with 2 minor faults 😂 but by god, it’s easier driving in torrential rain, wind and in the dark than having kids in the back at times 😂😂😂

Wheresthebiffer2 · 05/06/2020 23:43

My first driving instructor (it took me a while, so I had a few) had a child seat in his car all the time - it was for his own child. My child was only a few months younger, so I used to use that seat for mine during lessons when they were under 3yrs old. Instructor said you have to get used to driving with the distraction of a baby/child in the car, so may as well do it during lessons.

MamaLion1319 · 05/06/2020 23:43

My driving instructor always said I could bring my child on my lessons, if you're comfortable go for it! Your baby, your business!

Foxes157 · 05/06/2020 23:49

I drove between counties with my children in my own car and my sister supervising me.

My official driving instructor didn't say it was illegal.

flamingochill · 05/06/2020 23:51

I had to do this. In a way it's good real world practice as kids can be unpredictable and suddenly cry etc

blubellsarebells · 05/06/2020 23:58

Its not illegal I used to take my son with me on my driving lessons.
I had a lot of lessons, failed 3 tests.
I wouldn't have been able to keep up weekly lessons and eventually pass if i hadn't kept ds with me for some of them.
I drove with a friend supervising me also and it was fine.
Do it, roads are quieter at the moment anyway its a good time to get the hours in.

Original poster
Gimmecaffeine · 06/06/2020 05:57

So this would be with DH supervising me, so there's a handbreak but no dual controls.

I've had a huge amount of lessons and as soon as if I'm offered a critical worker driving test I'll book a few more. I'm definitely test ready but last time nerves caused a stupid decision. It's bloody hard to get a driving test currently so I want to do everything I can to try and make sure I pass it. I need a car for my job and it's really humiliating currently.

OP posts:
ThisIsNotARealAvo · 06/06/2020 06:01

I learned recently and passed my test in February. My kids are older but I used to drive around with DH and kids in the back regularly for practice. If you've been learning for 2 years and you're ready for the test then you should be fine as long as the baby doesn't distract you. You are definitely allowed passengers when you are learning.

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