AIBU for buying reusable nappies for my 18 month ol?

[MrsLully]

Hello 🙂

My DD is 18 months, and she has been suffering with nappy rashes for a while now. They have never been too bad (never blisters and blood) but they are stubborn and the older she gets the more aware she is and tries to scratch and whatnot. We have mainly used Water Wipes and Pampers Premium protection on her, but we have tried different brands of both nappies and wipes to see if they would make a difference, but so far they haven't. We always change her very often, and dry before applying whatever cream we are using at the time - we have tried them ALL.

We have been to the GP many times and I feel like they can't put the finger on what's actually wrong. They have prescribed antifungal creams three times, and all of them have worked on due time. The thing is that they all had steroids on them, so they would have worked anyway even if the cause was different. Fungal creams on there own have never worked for us, even when the rash is on it's early stages.

She does have some eczema flare ups and very sensitive skin, so I think that maybe her skin just doesn't like disposable nappies. I have tried the eco chemical free nappies, but the few that we've tried are either massively expensive or quite rubbish quality.

WIBU to get a stash of reusables at this point? I just want her bum to look nice and redness free for once 😭

Eczema often flares up as a result of moisture. Unfortunately, apart from changing very often, not bathing for a really long time and, potty training sooner rather than later there isn’t much you can do about that. It may also be as a result of products you use on her skin, things like sudocream for instance are quite bad, it could also be something you are using during bath times like baby oil that is making it worse. There’s no harm in trying reusable nappies but you won’t know if they help until you’ve tried them. I would only get a couple and see how they go before buying a lot.

If you’re home with her at the moment I would just start gently teaching her to use the potty. It may seem early but 18 months is a great age to do it. But by all means buy a few reusables as you can always use them for future kids/pass them on to friends/sell them later.

Have you tried the potty at all yet? I know she's young but it's a good idea to introduce the concept early and as long as you stock up on cleaning supplies, you could give her a couple of hours a day with no nappy to give the area a chance to heal.

I put teddy on the potty and explained he was having a wee. We seemed to crack weeing quite quickly by doing this. We did reward with a little sweet each time too. It was only for a few days and then he forgot to ask about the sweet and we stopped mentioning it.

There are fb groups for selling preloved cloth nappies which may be worth checking out. They might just need a good clean before you use them with your little one as her skin is so sensitive you wouldn’t want to take any chances. I follow the Clean cloth nappy (search on fb) routine which has also worked for us, it’s a much stronger cleaning routine than many manufacturers recommend but there’s been a lot of science behind it and it does keep the nappies spotless.

It might be worth getting a few of the cheaper brands to see if it makes a difference, amazon and ebay sell pocket ones for about £5, we have those and they work fine, although I did invest in good boosters so they hold more wee. Little lamb have triple thickness bamboo boosters which are not very bulky and hold loads of wee.

The nappy lady has a great website which covers all the basics so it’s definitely worth checking out. You may also have a nappy library in your local area you can contact, although covid may have put their lending or face to face tutorials on hold.

Feel free to message me if you have any other questions. I’ve read some babies having allergies to disposable nappies, so it’s possibly that your little one might have something like that and cloth would make a positive difference.

Yanbu. We swapped our son over to cloth nappies at 19 months - we figured there is still around at least a year of him in nappies to go (can't see him being out of them completely by 2.5 years) so it's not too late!

We use the little lamb bamboo Velcro nappies (that come with separate wraps). We've got 21 nappies and 7 wraps, a tots bots bucket with mesh liners, 50ish cheeky wipes with pound land plastic pots and some essential oil & 5 boosters for night time. We also have the little lambs disposable nappy liners.

Not going to lie it did cost a couple of hundred to buy all this stuff but honestly I'm SO happy we did it and very much regret not doing it much sooner! The nappies are brilliant and never leak. Brilliant never having to nip out and buy nappies & I only have to wash every other day (persil non bio powder is great) so it's really not the huge PITA I feared it might be - totally manageable.

Good luck

Thank you very much for all of your quick answers, I really appreciate it.
@IShineAShoe I've thought about buying second hand, but particularly with nappies it doesn't seat right with me. I have my eye on a fairly cheap Amazon bundle and was planning to get good bamboo or charcoal liners to make them more absorbent. I might take you up on the advice offer, thanks!
@EmperorCovidula we have tried all that, and nothing seems to make any difference. We do have her eczema under control, as we now have a routine and products that we know work for her, thank God.
@Breckenridged we do have a Potty (we got it a long time ago because she told us when she needed to poo) but she only started walking independently a couple of months ago. Also, she's had some constipation problems (we do seem to have cracked that as well for the time being) and apparently trying to potty train when the child tends to have poos on the hard side can lead to accidents and problems with her bladder later on. Of course I'm not an expert and I've thought about trying many times, but she's not showing signs yet as she wakes up really wet from her nap and at night time, for example.
@firstimemamma thanks for sharing your experience, it's reassuring to know I'm not the only one that switches late in the game. I can't see her being potty trained any time soon to be honest.

Why would that be unreasonable? But if you do work out how to use them without rashes starting within an hour, please tell me. I tried every line, every barrier cream, but could not get them to work, though to be fair my daughter has very sensitive skin. Good luck.

It's ok op, hope everything works out.

I'm sure all children are different but you may not find cloth helps with eczema. DS1 was in cloth from birth but when he was 2 we stopped using them because his eczema was getting too bad. They are a lot wetter in cloth, and especially overnight this can be problematic. He had open, bleeding sores and it all cleared up with disposables. We then went back to cloth and it came back so we abandoned them.

I think it might be unreasonable as she's already 18 months old, and money wise it's a bit late in the game. We are actually trying to have another one, so if they work we'd use them, so that's not too bad.

My main concern is that they either don't solve the problem or actually make it worse. Given the amount of money that is needed to give them a fair try it's a scary prospect, and I've heard both positive stories (rashes disappearing) and horror stories (getting way worse).

@ShebaShimmyShake did you use to use disposables before or started out with cloth? Any idea what triggered the rash to begin with?
@bluechameleon I know, that's why I don't know what to do

I used disposables initially (shock of new parenting!) and after a few weeks I tried to use washables. I really really wanted them to work and I tried different brands of liner and barrier cream, but she just always started developing red spots within an hour of a change. She also always wet the nappy as soon as it was changed, which she didn't seem to do with disposables (had the colour change line on them so I could see).

She is very very fair skinned so maybe she was just very sensitive. I did try, very hard, but I had to admit defeat in the end and go back to disposables.

But I know lots of people who had a great experience with them, so hopefully they'll work for you. They are very bulky though.

@ShebaShimmyShake thanks for sharing your experience. I just feel like I've tried everything else, and don't know what else to do. They joys of parenthood I suppose

OP, I'm deeply sorry about the skin problem. It must be an awful worry. But in case this helps I'd like to say that there's nothing magic about the fabric cloth nappies are made from, they are just towelling. So my suggestion would be to make some of your own from old towels as a trial. Or if you don't have any old enough to be cut up, perhaps friends have.
My three were all in cloth nappies from birth as we couldn't afford disposables. In fact for one of them we had to use an actual bath towel at night because she was on diuretics ( heart problem).

I’ve always used reusables and my DC have never had nappy rash so I definitely think they’re better. I’ve only ever used disposables when we’ve been on holiday and I bloody hate them, they stink!

It’s a huge investment to begin with though and at 18 months, I’d argue it may be wasteful unless you’re planning on buying cheaper second hand ones. I’d try lots of nappy off time now it’s summer if you’re at home. Perhaps try veering towards a potty too if you’re feeling brave, 18 months isn’t too young.

I certainly get far, far less thrush from washable CSP and think it's because the fabrics are more breathable and less sweaty. I regularly used to get an attack at the end of my periods.

I invested in cloth when DS1 was about 18m to 2y... but I was pregant with DS2 so it was 2 for the price of 1. DS didn't toilet train until 3 either.

It can be trial and error finding the right cut, and that can change. DS1 and DS2 had different builds and suited different brands. They do wet quickly which is allegedly good for earlier toilet training. I found they were much better at containing poonamis.

It's worth trying a few to see how you get on. They tend to hold resale value well if you don't so finanically that's no worse than spending on disposables in the meantime.

The best thing I found for sore bums is nappy free time. Easy when the weather is nice if you have a garden as you just let them potter around the garden with a bare bum. Harder when it is miserable - I remember moving into the bathroom with ds for a day - luckily it is a decent size and it had vinyl flooring so was easy to wipe clean and then we just had all his toys in there. It was pretty dull and miserable and by the end it felt like the walls were closing in but it seemed to improve his bum a lot.

Thank you all
@liverpoolnana I thought that maybe the lack of chemicals in the nappie might help with the rash? It's very impressive that you managed to find somethi g that worked for you despite difficulties, well done you!
@pleasenodont we are trying for a second one, so I'm not too worried about that, just at the fact that as so many people are saying, they might make the problem worse?
@BogRollBOGOF I used to always have irritation problems until I switched to the cup ten years ago, so her skin might just be as mine and not get on well with chemicals?
@Mumoftwoyoungkids she does have lots of nappie free time, but as soon as the nappie goes back on it starts again, so it feels a bit pointless to be honest

Have a look for a local nappy library, they can give you good pointers and look at what's best for you. Reusable nappies were like a minefield for me with all the different wraps, styles inserts etc.
I use reusable wipes and find them fab! Very gentle on the skin and had now nappy rash. I use cheeky wipes xx

She might be allergic to disposable nappies, it happens. I took my child on holiday and took disposables when she is usually in cloth. She got a horrific rash. Swabbed back to cloth and it disappeared.

I found the only thing that helped was having no nappy on for as much as possible.

Not sure if you have tried this but we use curash baby powder on ours, it's the only thing that has kept our kids bums rash free.

We have used both cloth and disposable, I would say the rashes were harder to keep at bay with the cloth. Partly because the moisture is not wicked away the same as disposables do and partly because you are meant to use very little in the way of creams/powders that will clog the nappy when you use cloth.

Are your water wipes pure water? We found the water wipes were worse for ours even though the were meant to be 'only water' they weren't (I spoke to the company) and they brought our child who we used them on out in a big rash within days.

I had this exact problem with DD1, and it did get to the point of weeping/sore, even infected a couple of times (she also had bad body eczema). We were already using cloth so nothing to try there.

I second/third the early potty training as that is exactly what worked for her. She didn’t walk until 18 months but after that, starting with nappy free time inside, we got to the point where I would sit her on the potty every 1.5-2h - chocolate button reward at the ready - and she would wee and stay dry that way. Totally true that it’s the parent who is trained, rather than the child(!), in early potty use but for the sake of a dry bum all day (didn’t crack nighttime until much later) it was well worth it. Her skin was loads better. And by the time she was 2 I was able to travel about with her fairly confidently.

Sympathy and wishing you luck - I really know the anxiety of seeing their poor red skin go on and on...!

Thank you all
I've found out that a fried bought a second hand stash of second hand reusable nappies at the begging of lockdown because she wanted to have some in case she wasn't able to get hold of disposables. She has offered to let me try them for free for a few days and see if they make a difference - we'll then buy them from her of if they work. Apparently if the cause of the rash is the use of disposables we should see a difference in within a day or so.
We'll try this, and if it doesn't work I think I'll give potty training a try, at least outside naps and night time.
Thanks again, all your advice was very much appreciated

@StoppinBy where do you get the powder, if you don't mind me asking? We have tried cornstarch but didn't make a difference. We looked at different brands of powder after exhausting the cream options but all of them had talcum