To ask if you AREN'T sending your child back to school...

[Frume]

If your childs school is opening and your child/children are in the year groups returning, what made you decide to not send them back?

I'm still undecided and have until tomorrow to decide. I've read many reasons for sending them back, but not many reasons against.

Thank you!

How old is the child in question? I'd not be sending back a reception child personally- it has the potential to be quite traumatic and I am concerned we may see problems with health anxiety as a result of the extreme measures being taken in some settings.

DH is shielding.
The whole distancing thing in classrooms sounds awful.
I don’t think schools should be open unless they have to be.

Mine aren't going back. I don’t like the new rules they are quite extreme and don’t want my son to be a nervous wreck, would rather keep him at home. Besides he’s always disliked school anyway and when his two siblings get to stay at home he will be upset being the only one made to go back.

They do have to be open.

Because I want to see what effect the easing of the lockdown measures has on the number of cases and R rating etc, before I send my child back. I’m not saying I won’t, just not yet. I plan to return her in sept if things haven’t got worse.
Additionally I know the risk of death is really low. But I have a baby and a 7 year old and I am concerned about who would look after them if I was very unwell.

Have a look at the thread about the children who have been back in. Im surprised and really pleased tosee hoe muh they've enjoyed it!

Two of my DC have SN and won't properly understand d why school is different, they're liable to find it very stressful and anxiety-inducing.

One if my DC is not in an eligible year group and I really can't be chewed with the "why do we have to go and she doesn't?/why do they get to go and I can't?" arguments.

I don't believe school in it's current set up can properly meet my childrens' needs particularly with the relaxation of laws relating to EHCP provision.

The work being set in school is the exact same work being set for those children still learning at home so they're not gaining any significant advantage by attending.

DH is in a vulnerable group, he meets the criteria for shielding but has not received a letter despite the GP chasing it up. GP has advised to stringently self-isolate.

I think it's too soon after recent easements of lockdown and more time should have been allowed to see if those easements had an impact on the R-rate before allowing more children back to school.

Track and trace is an utter shambles and I think this should be properly up and running before schools return.

Schools have not been properly funded, advised, or provisioned for allowing the return of more pupils. Its unfair on staff and it's unfair on the children. Many schools are going to struggle to maintain the new rules when all year groups return as they won't have the space or resources to accommodate it.

@FourPlasticRings Mine are in Reception and Year 1

I’m not sending my reception child. I spoke to the head teacher and she said it would be traumatic for them because of how different things are and if she were me she wouldn’t. Our school opened on Monday and I’m friends with someone who works in the school whose said that they’ve seen some really upset kids, however the parents are all saying it’s great and everything’s fine and kids are loving it, either the kids aren’t being honest or the parents aren’t, but either way I don’t want my daughter dealing with school when before all this she really loved it, I’d rather keep her home and comfortable (an option I know I’m lucky to have) then send her back and it mess up the whole thing, she’s going to be there for a while, I don’t want to risk her am hating it at this stage and her never getting away from that feeling.

Well, you could always ask what measures they're putting in. In ours they've gotten rid of all toys and soft play things, closed the playground, banned playtime, are sitting the desks 2m apart (how with reception kids, I don't know, as they don't actually sit at desks), making then wash their hands really regularly, not allowing them to share apparatus... I just don't think I could send my reception kid into that situation unless I had no choice. I do wonder about the long term mental health implications of being made to feel that all other people are somehow dangerous.

'Many schools are going to struggle to maintain the new rules when all year groups return'

Now there's an understatement and a half. My kids primary is at max capacity under new rules with less than half of reception, yr 1 and yr6 attending. Given the number of teachers shielding they actually cannot open at all with all 700 kids attending, let alone with any kind of distancing. It's madness.
I'm not sending my littlest in. The restrictions make sense for teachers but definitely not for small kids, and there's no way of squaring that circle right now.

Now there's an understatement and a half. My kids primary is at max capacity under new rules with less than half of reception, yr 1 and yr6 attending

Same. My DC are in a three tier system and the first school was full to bursting before this with not a single spare classroom and several mixed classes in order to accommodate everyone. The school goes from nursery up to year four. With nursery, reception, and year one working in groups of 12 with one teacher and one LSA per group, plus two groups of 12 keyworker children, every classroom is in use. When the other children return, presumably in September, they are either going to have to increase the number of children in each classroom, install mobile classrooms (using magic, nonexistent money), or operate on a rota basis.

There is also the fact that school supported home learning is going to have to continue for the foreseeable future as there will be shielded children unable to return, children in vulnerable groups either advised not to return or reluctant to return, or children who live with people in either of those two groups. Anyone with symptoms must self-isolate for seven days, anyone living with them must self-isolate for fourteen days. Given how frequently children get coughs and/or fevers, particularly in the winter months, attendance is going to be low and there will be a moderate amount of children absent at any one time but for whom education provision must still be made.

In addition to this, there will be parents who don't follow self-isolating rules for whatever reason - because they're worried they're going to lose their job if they have to take time off, they can't afford to take leave, they don't accept that CV19 can be serious, "it's just a cough", and so on. These parents aren't going to keep their child/themselves/other family members at home for 7/14 days every time one of them has a cough or a temperature. How many times do you see something posted on FB by a parent from school about "Little Jenny has been sick " only for Little Jenny to be right there in the yard for school the following morning? My DC school has had parents trying to sneak in children with active chickenpox infections, children with sick bugs, children who are clearly unwell but who have been dosed with Calpol and sent in, CV19 will be no exception.

Speak to your school about what it will be like. Different schools are making different choices. At ours, the children will be allowed to play freely in their bubbles and not required to keep distance at free play time - they will be seated further apart when working on an activity or in group time and there will still be toys, just not soft toys. If our school had been planning to distance reception age children I wouldn't have sent her back.

Many schools are going to struggle to maintain the new rules when all year groups return
The restrictions will slowly be removed, just like the threat level. September will be all in, and it will be pot luck if you get it or not.

I’m a year 1 teacher and my youngest child is in year 1. Neither of us are back at school yet! My school has delayed wider opening and I’m not prepared to put my own children in yet because I genuinely don’t think it’s safe. Where schools have opened - the teachers will undoubtedly have made the best of a bad situation and will have done everything to normalise things for the kids. However, there’s no escaping from the fact that we’re operating in a country with a huge death rate and the virus is not yet contained.

Because I don’t think it’s safe just yet and I would rather wait a few weeks to see what happens now they’ve opened back up. School have put my 5 year old in a class with none of his best friends and the music teacher rather than his own teacher. I don’t really see the point of him being taught by a music teacher and not someone who teaches phonics etc all the time. (He’s adamant he’s not going back without his normal teacher too) It’s only two days a week too so he won’t be missing much. I have three others at home and don’t work so he doesn’t need to go and finally I’m in the vulnerable category as I was on hospital in severe heart failure earlier this year so really don’t need to raise the risk of catching it!

I'm in a shielding household so won't be sending DS back.
He is in Yr6 so I don't think he'll be missing much from now until September when he goes to secondary school.
We've been keeping up with the homeschooling nonetheless.

Personally I would speak to the school. That was a HUGE factor in me deciding to send my 4yr old DD back and no one here can give an opinion on that unless you tell us the plan. I was happy with the way our school have dealt with the situation and DD seems happy too 2 days in. They have desks for group work (2/3 at a desk so not alone) and lots of free play outside. Lunch is in the hall as usual or outside. They have removed a lot of ‘fluff’ from the classroom but I’m not too bothered as year 1 classrooms are a lot less fun anyway so it doesn’t hurt for her to get used to that now. I have had photos of my daughter beaming whilst playing with friends and on school play equipment. If it was winter, and I knew they would be stuck inside I may have made a different decision.

Because my dd5 used to make herself sick with worry before school and I don't want to make the matter worse by sending her into an environment she would find traumatic for the sake of 5 weeks of school. Her cousin is in the same class and he's going back but the school have said they would separate them into different bubbles to help with social distancing as they're so close to eachother. The emotional implications far outweigh anyway positives for my child.

I’ve not sent my reception child back but equally don’t judge those who have, it’s a very personal decision as everyone’s circumstances are different.

We have a year 4, reception and 5 week old. Reception child is still only 4 and not 5 til the end of July so legally she’s not obliged to go to school yet. Her class is lovely, very much play based and very little sit down work so the changes will be a stark contrast to that.

The schools plan outlined individual work stations at desks where they will work and eat lunch 2 meters away from their closest class mate. Although there’s lots of outside time, the thought of her sat alone at her little table was like a smack in the face and my gut feeling was to keep her at home.

I spoke to her teacher and asked what we need to be focusing on so that she isn’t falling behind and we’ve been really well supported with plenty to keep her busy.

I’d consider sending my year 4 as I feel that she’s missing out more and is mature enough to cope with the change and the new rules however would only send her if she felt comfortable to go.

With the little ones in particular I worry that the emotional impact of returning to school with the changes in place will outweigh any education they miss. I know that it’s incredibly important for some to go back but I know that my dd is happy and safe and learning at home and so that’s where she’ll stay for now. I know that I’m incredibly fortunate to be able to do that though.

If you can speak to the class teacher directly then I would do so. They know your child best from the schools point of view and will know what they can put in place realistically for home learning.

My eldest is reception age and she’s been dying to go back to school. Her school I think is in a quite unique position - they have tons of extra space and a surplus of teachers.

They’ve let them know that they’ll be in ‘bubbles’ and will have to do helicopter arms. They will have lots of outdoor play (weather permitting) but fewer choices of toys/equipment. A lot of emphasis on washing hands and only one child from each bubble to use the loo at a time.

They put it all in an easy to understand online booklet which I talked about with DD and she is still excited to go.

I hope and pray I will have a happy child to pick up tomorrow at 3. It’ll break my heart if it doesn’t work for her.

Side note: DD has SEN, she is registered as visually impaired so the smaller ‘bubbles’ may well work better for her.

A mix of reasons really.
Most importantly I’m shielding.
Also we have two and only one child is due back, so the other would be left alone without best friend and play buddy. They’re close in age.
I’m not currently confident enough in the test and trace system or infection rate. Hopefully this will change.
I can work around home schooling as I’m self employed. It’s not ideal and I’m shattered but it’s possible.
Our school has very limited places and baring in mind all of the above I think it’s fairer to leave a space for a child/parent who needs it more at this time.

Ps totally have no judgement at all for those who send children back. Everyone is different.

Keeping all three at home. I'm a keyworker but work from home, 3less in school is 3 less strain on the school and social.distancing measures.

My ds would of gone back to year 1 today but I have been told that he cannot take his own lunch and school would be providing all children with a packed lunch, of which I know ds wouldn't eat ( he has sensory issues with food, ASD). So because he wouldn't be eating I am keeping him home but that's the only reason.

He could of really done with the social interaction of other children even if they are socially distancing! He hasn't been around other children since the week before lockdown and I feel like all the hard work we put into him being interactive with other kids has gone out the window, so yea would of been nice to get him back to school into some kind of a routine, but that won't be untill September now, and that's IF everything goes back to some form of normality by then 🤷.

I was really happy to read on the other thread all the positive comments of the children that have returned to school this week.

I also hold no judgement over any other parents decisions whether to send their children back to school or not 😉