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Original poster

To not understand the attraction of watching sex scenes

49 replies

Slipjigger · 27/05/2020 10:22

A new Irish drama called "Normal people" is getting rave reviews in many countries. I hadn't watched it but heard what it was about. During an ad break last night I flicked over to watch it for 2 minutes. It showed two people walking down the street hugging and then cut to a sex scene. It was fairly intense, close up shots of them etc. I watched for about a minute and it was still going strong so I switched off.

I just don't get the attraction of watching two people pretending to have sex. I can understand people watching pornographic films, its people actually having sex, its graphic and people get turned on by it.

But watching orchestrated scenes of pretend sex??

I feel the show has a bit of the "Emperor's new clothes" about it, like people feel they should like it because they are being told its trendy and popular and we should all be keen to watch people having sex.
I read the blurb of the book and while it seems an interesting story, I don't see what constant sex scenes offers to it.

Anyone care to share why they enjoy this kind of show!

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 27/05/2020 10:23

If you watch the whole thing from the start it will all make sense.

0hforfoxsake · 27/05/2020 10:24

It’s not about the sex, it’s about the intimacy that the two people share. That’s the whole story.

Saoirse7 · 27/05/2020 10:28

I watched it all, to be honest I though it was crap and very, very overhyped. The sex scenes were often unnecessarily I felt, some lasting 6 (out if a 22 min programme).

GatoFofo · 27/05/2020 10:28

I watched the first episode of White Lines, and had the same thoughts about the graphic orgy scenes. Weirdly unerotic and pointless.
I won’t be watching Normal People as I thought the book was a pile of angsty adolescent rubbish.

Sparklingbrook · 27/05/2020 10:31

I watched it all and thoroughly enjoyed it. The two leads were amazing.

Inthenameofchange · 27/05/2020 10:32

Most sex scenes in films are often unnecessary imo. If I wanted to watch soft porn, I'll go watch one. I always skip them to continue with the actual story. Sure, they had sex, next? Why do I need to see them actually doing it for more than a second? I know some people enjoy it so each to their own I suppose.

StarlightLady · 27/05/2020 10:32

Why pick on one scene in isolation? The key matters are the consent issues demonstrated within the scenes.

Pretend sex? It’s acting! Most acting from period dramas to James Bond to star Wars is pretend.

Inthenameofchange · 27/05/2020 10:33

Not watched the film you mentioned btw.

Inthenameofchange · 27/05/2020 10:35

I also don't mind if it's an actual film about sex/orgy etc then great. It's part of the story but films just shoehorn sex scenes after sex scenes like it's supposed to be edgy or draw viewers in, why? Isn't the story good enough?

Sparklingbrook · 27/05/2020 10:40

In Normal People the sex scenes are important to the storyline moving forward. IMO. Others might disagree.
There’s a warning at the start. 🤷‍♀️

Homescar · 27/05/2020 10:41

I feel the show has a bit of the "Emperor's new clothes" about it, like people feel they should like it because they are being told its trendy and popular and we should all be keen to watch people having sex. I read the blurb of the book and while it seems an interesting story, I don't see what constant sex scenes offers to it

Why on earth would you pontificate about a series you haven't seen based on a novel you haven't read, and decide that other people (who have presumably watched the series and/or read the novel) are wrong and deluded into liking it? Hmm

I actually agree with you about the dullness of many sex scenes, but the fact is that this novel and the screenplay was cowritten by the novelist and follows it closely is in part about an obsessive on-and-off sexual/friend relationship between two people from their schooldays through till the end of the student years. The sex scenes in the novel are seldom more than touched in, and none are described in any detail at all Rooney really doesn't do description but presumably a visual adaptation has to show us something on screen to indicate that part of the draw between them is sexual, and what brought them together in the first place was sex?

Macncheeseballs · 27/05/2020 10:45

I completely agree, no idea why they have to show so much sex in normal people, you can tell the story without it, the actress was only 21, I think the director has exploited her in the same way her bondage boyfriend does in the story itself

TheStoic · 27/05/2020 10:47

I think if you are asking this question, sex scenes will never appeal to you in any form whatsoever.

aquashiv · 27/05/2020 10:51

I often think sex scenes ruin a good film and its almost cock waving on the part of the writer director showing how risque they are.

RandomLondoner · 27/05/2020 10:59

I get a bit bored with sex-scenes nowadays, though in the past they've served a similar purpose to soft-porn. But having actually watched this whole series, the sex scenes are generally a meaningful part of the story.

The series might not be for people who prefer car-chases to the subtleties of emotional relationships, but for people who enjoy a story with the latter, these sex scenes are reasonably relevant.

NaturalCleaningParticles · 27/05/2020 11:24

I agree, it's boring and unnecessary when the purpose of the film/show is to tell a story. Just show that it's about to happen/quick shot of it happening/show that it happened (takes what, 10 seconds to make the point?) then move on. If people want to watch sex then actual porn is out there.

Sparklingbrook · 27/05/2020 11:33

If you think the sex in Normal People is like porn you are watching the wrong porn. Grin

0hforfoxsake · 27/05/2020 11:35

Porn is not sex.

covetingthepreciousthings · 27/05/2020 11:38

I think the director has exploited her in the same way her bondage boyfriend does in the story itself

I think this is uncalled for, have you read anything about the making of the series? The series had an intimacy coordinator who worked closely with the actors to make sure everything that was done was OK for them and that they felt comfortable.

Many many films and tv shows won't go to the lengths of hiring an intimacy coordinator, and you only have to read interviews with Ita O'Brien to hear how horrible some film sets and directors can be for actors in this aspect.

justamumof1 · 27/05/2020 11:38

It's too over the top. They could have toned it down and still delivered the the main message of the story in a comprehensive manner.

Sparklingbrook · 27/05/2020 11:44

I don’t see which bits were ‘over the top’. I might watch the series again to check...

RedHelenB · 27/05/2020 11:44

I actually think its refreshing to have more "realistic" sex scenes. Tbh I looked at my phone for a lit if it but the " chat " diring the act, asking if he should stop, even putting on a condom etc has never featured in any sex I've seen in films.

Mustardfan · 27/05/2020 11:47

I completely agree with the OP, I also really dislike sex scenes. I find it hard to find things to watch that don’t have sex scenes in them. It’s one reason why I’m really enjoying This is Us, there is no gratuitous sex or violence. I wish there were more programs like that. Also think that filming the sex scenes can be very unpleasant, bordering on abusive for the actresses, and I read an article a while ago where actresses stated that they feel this way about filming and auditioning for sex scenes.

Sparklingbrook · 27/05/2020 11:47

The scene where they sleep together for the first time is a lesson in consent.

Likethebattle · 27/05/2020 11:55

Many programmes are now over the top. Outlander is a bit much most of the time, they could leave something to the imagination ffs!