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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is it i just me, or would you be annoyed.

86 replies

Radley · 20/09/2007 18:04

DH went out at 4pm saying that he was going to do a bit of shopping.

I have just phoned him as the kids were wanting him, they've hardly seen him this week due to him working.

He has done NO shopping yet and got the taxi straight to the pub. IMO he had no intention going shopping.

AIBU to be royally pissed off, when I can't leave the kids for 10 mins without getting a text asking me how long i'll be etc.

OP posts:

lololola · 21/09/2007 21:33

lorayn; read your post on maximoparks thread; must say ive never heard the phrase bumping uglies, omg lAUGH! but bck to the point; bloody right to expect to be treated like a goddess. only have one life, why waste it with a bastard.

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 21:36

Ha, my mum used to say it.
and don't know about the OP but I used to be perfectly fine with my ex going to the pub, he just never mentioned it.
I often said 'you out tonight?' on a friday morning, (i knew he would be, why not try not to have lies/arguments about it) he would always say no, then just not come home.
I was left totally baffled.

collision · 21/09/2007 21:36

The OP is annoyed but I am not sure she wants to leave her DH!

Do you Radley?

When the others said to kick him out, is that what you want? do you love him?

dont break up a family just because he is a bit thoughtless etc

PSCMUM · 21/09/2007 21:37

totally, chantilly i think if you read the OP, you';ll find she does all the childcare, he does fuck all, leaves her to deal with the kids all the time, and acan't even keep his sad arse out of the pub for one night when she is ill. i too hgave got the separation t-shirt and its my favourite.

Original poster

Radley · 21/09/2007 21:38

Chantillylaced (love the name) i arent a battleaxe, and a few weeks ago put his name down to join the pool team (1st match he rolled in at 4.30 am completely off his face) the reason he doesn't tell me is because he knows my opinion of going to the pub all the time.

I will admit, I used to be guilty of wanting to go to the pub all the time and now if I go after half hour i'm bored bored bored and want to come home, more often than not if I go in i have a soft drink, if i ever get a alcoholic one the barmaid (who is a friend) thinks i'm ill

He has tried today but i cannot be arsed to be honest

OP posts:

lololola · 21/09/2007 21:42

lorayn, how long did you put up with it ? its very difficult to make final decision when kids involved, (or maybe easier)

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 21:45

I was an idiot to be honest, I didn't end it until I was told he was taking cocaine upstairs at some house we were at, totally shocked went up to confront him only to find his penis in someones mouth.............
I'm not sure how long I would have put up with it if that hadnt happened, though when I finally ended it I felt like I had been waiting for a 'legitimate' excuse forever.
The pub thing etc got so normal that sadly I didnt see how I could end the relationship because of it.

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 21:45

didnt think for one moment you were a battleaxe! really sympathise with the way you are feeling.

Only you know if you love him or not but the one thing you should not do is rush into a decision but dont 'stay for the kids' mine were much happier with 2 single happy parents than 2 'antlers locked' parents!!

I appreciate I get a little more help than you childcare wise, and I'm with kids all day as a CM so need the break from small people even if it is only for a while. But have to admit I'd love to go to the pub on a Friday night!!!

Have a horrible feeling I'm babbling now!

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 21:50

Now in Lorayn's case - deserved a bit of the John Bobbitt approach by the sound of it!!!

What an a-hole!!

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 21:58

good thing about arseholes, they end up sad and lonely

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:04

and they're full of shit!!!

Original poster

Radley · 21/09/2007 22:04

I think dh will end up sad and lonely, I on the other hand have had other offers . Not that i would do anything, i seem to be the only one in this relationship who honour their vows.

OP posts:

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:05

Well bloody good luck to you whatever you decide!! As for the offers - alwayws keep your options open!!

Original poster

Radley · 21/09/2007 22:08

well, one is 12 years younger and other is 15 years older dh is 12 years older than me

OP posts:

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 22:08

Radley, My last piece of advice for you.
Just Be Happy

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:09

nowt wrong with a toyboy but then again not much wrong with a sugar daddy!

my exDH was 6 yrs older and the current one (as I said, options open) is 6 yrs younger!

Original poster

Radley · 21/09/2007 22:10

I would/can and have been happy with no man. I may love/want to be with a man, but I certainly don't need a man

OP posts:

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:10

ditto Lorayn!!

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 22:10

ha chantilly sounds like me, the ex was 5 years older, DP is five years younger.

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 22:12

they have been the wrong men then, all mine were arseholes til DP (not that there were that many, honestly )
But, no you should never need a man, I wouldnt want someone to be with me cos they needed me I want them there because they want me

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:12

we dont need them but believe it or not they have their uses!!

getting hooked on here now, the telly's off and I'm trawling through all the messages seeing if I can offer pearls of wisdom! how sad on a friday!!

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:14

go on then Lorayn how many??? we won't tell!

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 22:15

ChantillyLace · 21/09/2007 22:16

Lorayn · 21/09/2007 22:18

ha, a lady never answers a question like that, enough to know that you cant keep kissing frogs looking for a prince, you have to realise some are already princes

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