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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say I'm half Irish

579 replies

Winederlust · 23/05/2020 01:15

Just wanted to settle a petty argument between DH and I.
I was born in England. As was my mum. My dad also. However both his parents were born in ROI. They moved to the UK as young adults and met, married and settled with a family in England.
I think that, although my dad was born in England, he is full blooded Irish. Which in turn makes me half Irish. My DH reckons I'm quarter at best.
Not a big deal in the grand scheme of things but just interested in the general MN population's thoughts?

OP posts:
Gwenhwyfar · 23/05/2020 10:10

"However, I have lived in Ireland since I was 2."

Yeah, but OP's dad didn't.

ChurchOfWokeApostate · 23/05/2020 10:13

This is my point. They're not accurate yet for countries of origin

Hmm, I’d say they are, as in, I don’t think they’re going to give you a false country, but yes, they should only be used as a tool to form part of the picture.
I agree with you they are definitely not the definitive answer, and you are definitely not the percentages it tells you.

If you think that every time a parent has a child they ‘lose’ half of the dna, even going back 4 or 5 generations, that’s a hell of a lot of ‘lost’ DNA.

Although for family relationships they are absolutely fantastic. I got in touch with my dads cousins daughter through it (so my second cousin), her dad had died when she was a kid, and so she didn’t reply know much about that side of the family, but it was easily confirmed by the family we were all related.

I personally think too many people think you need to choose one or the other. You can be ethically from x country and have nationality of y country and be simultaneously both, and proud of both.

1forsorrow · 23/05/2020 10:14

I'm normally identified as Irish by other people. I've even had someone tell me which county my family came from which really took me back. It was an elderly Irish woman, I'd just started a new job and she looked me up and down and said, "You're Irish?" I said well I was born in England but Irish family. She then looked hard at me and said, "You have a look of (named county father came from) about you." When I said yes father's side of the family came from there, mother's from nearby just over the border, we had a chat and she came from a village close to where father was born.

Gwenhwyfar · 23/05/2020 10:17

"Hmm, I’d say they are, as in, I don’t think they’re going to give you a false country,"

Well, they can give you a country that your DNA comes from a very, very long time ago and not really part of your identity now, like the Danish thing I mentioned above.

1forsorrow · 23/05/2020 10:17

You can be ethically from x country and have nationality of y country and be simultaneously both, and proud of both. My kids are entitled to 3 nationalities, they haven't bothered to get 3 passports. They are British as born here, Irish nationality through my parents and also their father's nationality. My son intends to get a third passport, likes the idea of being able to choose what he is at any time.

ArgumentativeAardvaark · 23/05/2020 10:21

It’s interesting, some people are having a hard time accepting the idea that OP’s Dad could have been 100% Irish because he was born and brought up in England to two Irish parents.

Yet nobody bats an eyelid when my DH describes himself as “half Dutch” because he was born and brought up in England to one British and one Dutch parent.

ChurchOfWokeApostate · 23/05/2020 10:31

It’s interesting, some people are having a hard time accepting the idea that OP’s Dad could have been 100% Irish because he was born and brought up in England to two Irish parent’s

I’ve never really given much thought about where people are from in terms of percentages, but I would say I think it’s probably because of culture.
Someone 100% Irish would have been brought up in Ireland.
Being brought up in the Uk, with fully Irish parents, there will be obvious similarities in culture with other Irish people, because of Irish family, but then obvious differences as well, such as: being educated in a British school, receiving healthcare under a British healthcare system, British laws, British media, etc etc. Which will differ vastly from someone brought up in Ireland.
Whereas saying 50% English 50% Dutch may make more sense in that there will be a mixture of British and Dutch culture.

Like I said though, I’ve never really thought of it in terms of percentages.
In the OPs case if she said she’s Irish, or British, or both, that would all make sense to me.

FeelingTheBurn · 23/05/2020 10:35

It’s interesting, some people are having a hard time accepting the idea that OP’s Dad could have been 100% Irish because he was born and brought up in England to two Irish parent’s

And yet someone born and brought up in England with two, eg Nigerian parents could never be 100% British to some people. (NOT suggesting anyone on this thread may think this, it's just an observation)

Prokupatuscrakedatus · 23/05/2020 10:41

Gwenhwyfar
That's why I said "with me" - and if you had read the thread fully you'd know why.

tara66 · 23/05/2020 10:43

Of anyone knows an organisation that can trace Irish ancestry well - would be interested. Looking for grandfather's birth certificate but cannot find it. Unfortunately they burnt down the Records Office in 1917.

FeelingTheBurn · 23/05/2020 10:49

tara66 what year was your grandfather born? I have done a lot of research on family ancestry and may be able to point you somewhere.

YahBasic · 23/05/2020 10:50

@ArgumentativeAardvaark it was completely coincidental due to work - he was offered a work contract there so we thought why not.

Possibly we considered it more strongly because he had family there and the connection to the country, but getting the cultural connection back was a lovely unexpected surprise for him, on top of what was an amazing 3 years spent there.

Iona1985 · 23/05/2020 10:52

I am half Irish. My father was born in England. Both his parents were born in Ireland and are Irish. I have an Irish passport. I was informed by their government this makes me half Irish. So yes, your husband is wrong.

SallyWD · 23/05/2020 10:56

You're half Irish! My DH's parents were born and raised in India. My DH was born and raised in Europe. We still think our children are half Indian. Of course they are.

dottiedodah · 23/05/2020 11:07

I have Cornish Ancestry and refer to myself as "Part Cornish"! DD says she loves Cornish Ice Cream (who doesnt!) and thinks that because I had Ice Cream cravings when pregnant that is the reason LOL!

ArgumentativeAardvaark · 23/05/2020 11:07

Thanks @YahBasic. An unexpected chance to reconnect, how nice.

Natsel84 · 23/05/2020 11:09

My parents are both English his father ( my paternal grandfather ) was born in Scotland. I was born in Wales, but we all live in Wales. I consider myself 50/50 Welsh/ English. Or I suppose I could say I'm welsh/English with Scottish heritage.

My husband mum was born in wales his dad Ireland. He considers himself 50 /50 Welsh / Irish.

I can see your point of view and your husbands

To me your dad would be half English half Irish, if your mums 100% English as in both your grandparents are English. I would be more inclined to say your English with Irish heritage, but if you wanted to put a percentage on it 75/ 25 . 75 English to 25 Irish.

Sorry if that's long winded 😂

Gwenhwyfar · 23/05/2020 11:10

"Yet nobody bats an eyelid when my DH describes himself as “half Dutch” because he was born and brought up in England to one British and one Dutch parent."

I wouldn't consider him half-Dutch.

Gwenhwyfar · 23/05/2020 11:12

"That's why I said "with me" - and if you had read the thread fully you'd know why."

My point was that I find your opinion of whether other people should be proud of where they come from totally irrelevant. And I have read the full thread.

dicksplash · 23/05/2020 11:15

Just wondering how long out of a country you have to be to stop being of that country.

Eg if ops mother also had Irish parents but born in the uk and op had children with a man of similar parentage does that make the children Irish too? Being Irish isn't a race so its not something that can be passed on by blood.

My Nana's mum was from Norway and her dad Germany but she was born in England. I never heard her describe her self as from those countries as she has never been there.

tenterden · 23/05/2020 11:16

You are a quarter Irish.

How can you be half Irish if neither of your parents is Irish? Confused

Want2beme · 23/05/2020 11:28

I learned a very long time ago not to refer to myself as half Irish or similar. My DM is Irish and I was born and brought up in England. I'm British with Irish connectionsGrin. I live in Ireland and here I am always referred to as English. I have an Irish passport, as I am an automatic Irish citizen by birth, which I'm happy about. Either way, you have Irish heritage, OP, which is great!

Namechange8186 · 23/05/2020 11:29

I honestly can’t grasp were the quarter part is coming from

If you are basing this on place of birth then you’d argue OP is 100 percent English

If you are Basing this on family heritage then ( obviously not looking further back in the ancestory) her father has two Full Irish parents So OP would be half Irish

I understand the arguments for not being born in Ireland and all that but seriously were does the quarter part come from ?!

Prokupatuscrakedatus · 23/05/2020 11:31

Gwenhwyfar
I am German by birth, all my ancestors for the last 400 years lived in that area, so you see where I am coming from and why I might be slightly suspicious of people who claim to be "proud to be x", which in no way denies anybody the right to be proud of of what they feel like being proud of.

DuesToTheDirt · 23/05/2020 11:41

How many generations does it take then to be English? OP's parents were both born in England, so was she....

Should we say that noone (white) is actually Australian, are they all English/Scottish/whatever, because that's where their ancestors are from?

DH and I are both English but our daughters were born and raised in Scotland. I'd never call them English, and neither would they.