To have kicked him out for good and some things you said to a child are unforgivable

[Deepmidwicket]

Had issues for ages with husbands temper.
Throwing things, breaking things.

Anyway thought we had had a break throw before lockdown. I thought he had taken responsibility, and everything was back to normal and we truly felt happy.

Anyway DS has been a nightmare the past 4 days. Answering back, refusing to so school work, hitting us. He has coped so well during lockdown but has really hit a wall this week. I knows its anger at not seeing his friends and grandparents.

Anyway I got home from a night shift and went to bed. Half an hour ago DS comes running in crying so I am trying to calm him
down. DH walks in and says “I am ringing social services to take him away” and “I hate the little shit”
DS obviously here’s all this and goes into meltdown.

I tell DH to get out now. DH rips off his T-shirt (literally). I calm DS down and then go downstairs.
I tell DH I can’t believe he would say that to his own son and yes I know he had been challenging but for goodness sake we are all going through hell but DS is six for goodness sake.

DH then yells that no one listens or respects him and I tell him to leave and don’t come back.

When he had gone I notice one of DSs beloved football annuals all ripped up. DS says daddy did it.

I know my marriage is over I just don’t know what to do next. I work nights, luckily not till next Monday now but I can’t carry on with that. I have seizures and fibromyalgia as well. Not sure I can do this. I know I have too but not sure how.

Your husband sounds like the definition of a monster to me. Keep your son safe and away from him. Swap onto day shifts and send child to school. Kick dickhead out. If he is throwing things and breaking things and you are fearful it could escalate phone the police and tell them what he did. Talk to a solicitor asap. Try to go for a protection order.

My mother used to say that I’d come home from school someday and she’d be gone. That still hurts me and I’m 52yr old. Don’t let that piece if shite leave scars on your child’s heart.

No question, that would be the end of the relationship for me. I don't know what your DS's behaviour is like, and he might need some intervention, but this was in no way an appropriate punishment.

Even in a Covid stress-filled world, I've never told my children that I hate them, I've never told them anyone will take them away from their home, and I've never destroyed their things.

I wouldn't keep them in an environment where someone (who was supposed to be protecting them) did any of those things.

He can't just apologise and go back to normal. He certainly shouldn't be allowed to ignore it and assume everyone else will let it drop. Your son won't forget any of it, and at this age it will be incredibly formative. What he did has long-term damage. It needs long-term consequences.

@HaddawayAndShite yes that’s what I meant I was just so shocked by it. I badly worded what I meant to say.

Op just keep Walking
You can do this
I’m now a single mother of two working FT
Things fall into place , they really will

If he really kicks off call police
Just keep going

He will try and bully and threat , stand firm

@HaddawayAndShite @Coffeeandbeans thanks for clarifying, for a moment I thought coffee was saying the DH was alright or something, yikes!!

@Savingshoes honestly take a look at yourself, you're ridiculous.