So pissed with OH

[Goshby]

His gardening obsession . Along with his parents .

Apparently he has MORE time as working from home and not commuting ....

Guess what ..

Wakes up late ( just before shift ) though to be fair sometimes he lets me lie in while he gets our toddlers (two ) breakfast .

A lie in for me is about 9.30

I do all the night wake ups with our three month old

Breastfeeding

I do most of the cooking and all of the cleaning , plus everything about the kids all day .

He does help When he wants to ... the chores he likes but feels like it’s no different to when he was doing the three hour commute .

Now he just has more time for gardening

I bust a gut cleaning the house while juggling three young kids ... Hoping that it means that we can have a sit down as a family in the evening but no ... it’s garden or work outs .

God I’m sounding like a right moaner

Am I wrong to feel pissed ... feels like it

I think it’s because he has time for hobbies and I don’t .

I must be being ungrateful

Well what time did you have to get up before?

If his new working pattern has changed your lie in from 6.30 to 9.30am that’s good isn’t it?

I would consider the gardening as housework around here.

I don’t know if I see it as a lie in as I’m doing all the night feeds etc so I feel like it’s just a catch up I still have to clean up after their breakfast when I’m up !

Oh I’m just moaning aren’t I

God I feel like a live in cleaner sometimes .

I’m doing all the night feeds

Thing is, he can't do this can he?

No he can’t

But I do feel pressured into breastfeeding

Well then don’t breastfeed

Lol good idea

Have you spoken to him about this in a calm rational way? If not, stop being a martyr, why are you busting a gut? Don't feel pressured to bf either, if its not working out then don't.

I would consider the gardening as housework around here.

Up to a point. Weeding can be done with toddlers, easier than a lot of housework.

What's making you feel pressured OP? Is it OH or just society in general?

OH really things BF is critical

But also thinks it’s a good idea for me to go back to work

On top of that had cordoned off most of the garden so the kids can’t play on it and he can treat it like his bloody gardening project

It’s not just pulling weeds

It’s the time

I rush around like a mad woman getting things done and he finishes work ... sees it all done so heads for the garden

I’m not going to bother anymore e

I don’t even have time for a fg hobby

Have you spoken to him about equal time to do what you want?

Im obviously placing some sort of pressure to create a family life in the evenings whilst he works from home but it looks like he has other plans .

I don’t even know what I would do by myself