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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this is actually really entitled parenting?

504 replies

GlummyMcGlummerson · 12/05/2020 14:38

Seen this post from several people this morning outraged at the walking couple

www.facebook.com/672995864/posts/10158029908925865/?d=n

Now I am in no way condoning the disgusting language of the man in question. But the dad showed such an entitled attitude. He didn't tell his DD to slow down even when she was on the heels of the couple. She could have hurt them if they'd been elderley or disabled, and you can't tell from behind. He didn't practice social distancing - even if the couple had moved they'd have been way less than 2m apart from them, unless they threw themselves into a bush. And when his DD fell off the bike, rather than comfort her he spent the time arguing with and blaming the couple while she cried on the floor.

I've taken my kids to paths like this during lockdown and have said if someone is walking ahead we have to walk behind them with the bikes until we can pass them safely or the paths get wider. This is while teaching them to cycle, and just because they have momentum it doesn't mean they shouldn't stop - surely that's part of learning to cycle, knowing when to judge the safety of themselves and others?

I suppose i also hate this trend of social media vigilantism whereby people want to share faces of those who've slighted them, usually with a huge amount of bias and very little context. And the general public seem to lap it up! I am hard of hearing and I hate cyclists coming up behind me when I walk as unless they bellow "excuse me" I simply will not hear them. I wouldn't be pleased if a child bashed into me and then I got yelled at by the parent for not having good hearing and eyes in the back of my head.

OP posts:
TeapotCollection · 12/05/2020 14:43

I’d love to know exactly where the parents expected them to move to! As the OP says, short of throwing themselves into a bush they had nowhere

MrsZola · 12/05/2020 14:44

Yes, entitled parenting.

GrimmsFairytales · 12/05/2020 14:45

Where did the dad expect them to go?

You can't just say excuse me and expect people to move, when they haven't got anywhere to move to.

TheMandalorian · 12/05/2020 14:46

Yanbu.
I have a 6yo and a 4yo (who has just started pedalling). It is totally the girl cyclists fault for not slowing down or even stopping and waiting. The couple could have been dead or disabled in some way. Or just not expecting someone to cycle into them from behind.
I say this as an avid cyclist myself. Their entitled attitude and lack of manners give the rest of us a bad name.
I too would have sworn if someone cycled into me.

MuthaClucker · 12/05/2020 14:48

I saw that this morning (admittedly I didn't have the sound on) and thought that if it was a recent event then the dad was totally in the wrong because there was no way he or the child could pass whilst adhering to the distancing rules.

Nicknacky · 12/05/2020 14:48

I think he was spoiling for an argument anyway unless he videos his kid cycling all the time.

Saying excuse me doesn’t mean you just barge through.

Nicknacky · 12/05/2020 14:49

Dead 😂😂

zscaler · 12/05/2020 14:49

I also don’t like Facebook vigilantism but it’s hard to be sympathetic to the couple in that scenario. That poor kid was clearly frightened and said excuse me many times. They ignored her, even after seeing her, and then they were thugs about it when she crashed.

You can argue that the kid shouldn’t have been cycling if she couldn’t maintain perfect control of her bike, but accidents happen and a small amount of decency on the part of that couple would have avoided this situation. I really can’t see any excuse for their behaviour.

olympicsrock · 12/05/2020 14:50

Agree he should have told his daughter to get off the bike and wait until there was a wide enough place to pass and let them move 2 m away. Silly to ride a ride on a narrow footpath like this. Rude to post on social media too

Sparklingbrook · 12/05/2020 14:50

OMG. Why didn't the parents tell her to stop?

No need for him to kick her bike at the end though.

ivfbabymomma1 · 12/05/2020 14:50

Yanbu aside from they didn't have to kick her bike!

GlummyMcGlummerson · 12/05/2020 14:50

Looks like it happened yesterday. The parents must be on MN as they've reported the couple to the police

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 12/05/2020 14:50

It doesn’t look like they heard her. Still doesn’t mean you barge on through.

zukiecat · 12/05/2020 14:50

TheMandalorian

I shouldn't laugh, but I am, at the wee typo about the couple who might be dead

Picturing two zombies out for a stroll 😀

Rocksandstones · 12/05/2020 14:50

Yanbu! So entitled. Why didn’t he tell her to stop and wait until they could pass them safely

qweryuiop · 12/05/2020 14:50

Absolutely.

It was also quite upsetting that the man cared more about having a go at the couple than about his daughter who had just fallen off her bike and was obviously upset.

MarcelineMissouri · 12/05/2020 14:50

The dad absolutely should have told his daughter to slow down and stop. Not their fault at all.

Sparklfairy · 12/05/2020 14:51

Jesus, the comments are all in support of the poster!! What planet are they on that they think it's okay for the child to barge between them on a bike!?

GlummyMcGlummerson · 12/05/2020 14:51

I don't blame the little girl at all FWIW she's only 6 bless her and when you start to learn you need complete direction from the person instructing you. She should have been told to stop. Poor kid.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 12/05/2020 14:52

Reported to the police? For what exactly|?

GrimmsFairytales · 12/05/2020 14:52

That poor kid was clearly frightened and said excuse me many times. They ignored her

Whilst it's not great that they ignored her, saying excuse me doesn't mean people have to move out of the way, especially in this case as they had nowhere to go.

If she was frightened her dad should have shouted at her to stop, and they could have gone past when there was space to do so.

stuckindoors77 · 12/05/2020 14:52

Why did the little girl wobble, scream and ride into them in a panic? If she didn't have the skills to control her bike then she wasn't really ready to be riding along a public footpath independently. Dad should have kept her at home or walked alongside her until she was a bit more in control.
I must admit I'm getting a bit fed up of cyclists on footpaths and pavements recently who seem to think that they have right of way over walkers. So whilst the behaviour of the couple wasn't good, I have a bit of sympathy for them.

somewheresorted · 12/05/2020 14:52

Obviously I do not condone at all what this guy did but the Same thing happened to me yesterday - walking on a narrow pavement with my DD when we heard a bike bell ring behind us. I turned round to see a small child on a bike with Mum behind. I refused to move until it was safer for all.

Having been a family of cyclists ourselves, I always instilled into my DC when they were young and occasionally riding on pavements or paths, that they were respectful of pedestrians, slowed down and waited until it was clear to pass.

I cannot understand this sense of entitlement that some parents give their DC!

Maybelatte · 12/05/2020 14:53

Meh I mean, the couple should have and easily could have parted ways to let her past. I’m not sure why they didn’t even turn around when the Dad was shouting excuse me ten times, surely it’s natural reaction to wonder why someone needs you to move out of the way? Plus they’ll have heard the child approaching from behind and again, just continued going.

The Dad probably should have intervened sooner to prevent the fall but the couple were arseholes and the man kicking the bike is pretty childish behaviour to say the least.

nanbread · 12/05/2020 14:55

YANBU, he didn't tell his DD to slow down, stop, wait etc - totally entitled arsehole behaviour and really letting his daughter down not teaching her how to behave properly on a bike. Saying excuse me doesn't give you the right to do whatever the hell you want.

The people he crashed into may be arseholes too, but that doesn't make him less of one.

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