To feel annoyed that DH arranged to meet a friend for a walk?

[Overseasmom100]

Said he was walking to the shops yesterday whilst I worked from home. Thought ok that's good freshair exercise etc. That evening I find out he'd arranged or his friend arranged it...to meet along the way to walk together. I confronted him and he's all arsey saying what's the difference to mixing with people in a supermarket. I said hang on...we've been told not to meet with people outside our families who knows what he would potentially bring back. Im not meeting with anyone not even family. We've even drilled it onto our DS 15 he cant meet friends.

Am I being unreasonable?

Oh I take back my comment, I didn't realise you was breaking the rules too!

There is no restriction on meetIng one other person in a public place - www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/2020/350/regulation/7/made

"Im not meeting with anyone not even family."

Yet...

"Im not vunerable but visit my 88 yr old very vunerable (lung condition and housebound) DF once a week"

You sound a tad hypocritical tbh. And I think you're making a mountain out of a molehill. Are there underlying issues in your marriage to begin with?

Im sure he stood nearer to a customer than he did his friend.

There is literally no risk in this - people need to start using their brains. From Sunday we will be encouraged to get outside and they will start changing the message and telling us there was never any risk from being near people outside. The govts own scientific advisors are quoted in papers this morning (see the Times) - saying that there is almost no POSSIBILITY even (let alone liklihood) of transmitting the virus outdoors.

Please people think for yourself - the lockdown is winding down now you are all going to have to start thinking clearly.

It's as though people think we are going to live like this forever - the lockdown has been going on for SEVEN WEEKS. We will have to live with a tiny risk - as we have with many other things like getting in cars, living with air pollution.

There was never any risk of being outdoors but they needed /wanted people to change their behaviour. It's time to start getting out, talking to people and moving around...

This is interesting, almost identical posts to this 2-3 weeks ago got very different responses where everyone was saying it was totally irresponsible stay the fuck at home etc.

Do you really have to take your very vulnerable DF shopping? Surely you could do the shopping for him? That seems like a crazy amount of risk for your DF to be going to the supermarket when he has a lung condition and is in his 80's.

Dont the rules say you can meet outside the home but no more than 2 people?

Condradicts itself later by saying you should not be meeting up with anyone outside your household?

I'm confused!

Absolute hypocrisy. It’s no different to people in my village walking along having a chat 2m or more apart when they’re going to the shops etc. as everyone knows each other.

Perhaps you should have moved in with DF? So as not to mix households ? If you only need to see him once a week though is it massively necessary? Who sorts him out the other 6 days?

Ohh this is funny OP

Incidentally you are saying about how he isn't setting a good example to your DS, now you didn't even find out until the evening that he had met a friend, why did your DS even have to know? As adults I actually do a lot of things my DC don't know about. Who told your DS?

I don't think you can have a go at him for flouting the guidelines when you're doing the same thing in visiting your elderly father!

I am sorry you are annoyed but your risking far more than he is. You do not HAVE to take your father shopping, he shoud not be going out and you should take his shopping to the door. Your husband on the other hand was out doors which is less risky. You are putting your father at great risk

It's the principle that seems to irk the poster. Whereas the reality is that her husband ambling along with a mate outside (men are unlikely to be holding hands or embracing) is so much less of a risk that taking a very high risk father to the shops. Which is quite frankly totally bonkers.

That's why coming through this is going to be such a challenge. Peoples perspectives are totally unbalanced

People hve lost sight of the science here. We need to start looking at real risk - the govt needed to scare people so it set boundaries beyond what was needed by epidimology - there is NO REASON why people couldn't sit on grass, have picnics, chat to people in the park - however we were frightened into believing the virus was floating across open air like a miasma (total nonsense) -

Now the govt needs to begin to get us out of the house - so can people please use their heads - the evidence (which you can look up online in peer reviewed studies) is now emerging that transmission has mainly taken place INDOORS in CROWDED places with people spending LONG PERIODS OF TIME together (sorry for shouting). ie. funerals/ parties/ church gatherings. There is no evidence that people have caught covid in parks or open air.

Thank goodness you are around to help your dad. You absolutely must do that. I understand your worry. It's about increasing risk. Your husband didn't have to meet his friend. He has gone against your household rules. (And the technical lockdown rules).

However, I think some of us are getting ti the point of really feeling we need social contact from others. Just for our mental health. Just to help us to continue with this restricted life. For this reason a walk outside is probably the safest way of doing this. So cut him some slack whilst pointing out that you need to set the right example to your son.

Are you taking your father to the shops? ? Transport is a key risk for Covid transmission so I hope you aren't in a car with him. Taking him shopping is not high risk if you take it to his door and speak to him ouitside. We will need to be aware of this going forward so that people can safely visit and support isolated family.

I think the advice from Sunday will be that we can go out as much as we like if we stay 2m away from people.

I thought the original poster means she takes shopping to her housebound father. Not that she's taking him out shopping.

Yes he broke "the rules" but nothing I wouldn't do, it's very safe in the open air but the government treats us like kids who cannot tell the difference between socialising in a risky way (packed city bar) and safe way (sedate picnic 2 metres from non household members).

I thought originally the guidance was you could meet up with someone, as long as there wasn’t more than 2 from different households? If so, your husband isn’t ‘breaking lockdown rules’.

You are not to meet up with anyone outside of your household

Unless it's your father or your name is Neil Ferguson......

He is in the wrong. Full stop. If we all did this it would be carnage. What gives him the right to bend the rules? The whole point is that we all do it.

You can meet up with one other person who is not from your household so long as you maintain social distancing.

No that’s not right. You’ve misunderstood or are out of date.