To be feel quite happy at home during lockdown

[caperberries]

Inspired by a survey, which suggested that most people feel closer to their families, less likely to split up from their partner and happier under lockdown.

Do you agree? In some ways, I really feel much happier under lockdown - I am spending more time with my family and rushing about far less without the school runs etc. It feels like a slightly more relaxed pace of life. Admittedly, our work situations are not difficult, which would make a big difference. Fifty percent of people in the survey I saw weren't currently working at all. AIBU to quite enjoy lockdown?

Much, much happier. And I thought I was happy before.

From the outside looking in my business has been tanked and will likely take a year to build up and I've lost 70-80% of income.

But we are spending no money, getting to watch loads of tv series we missed out on, spending loads of time chatting and hugging and many hours just pottering about.

We are both having to take our life in our hands one day a week going into school but we are not concerned - even though I'm travelling on multiple forms of public transport in London. It's not within my control so I don't worry.

I'm quite enjoying it too, and so is my DD (early teens)! My DH and younger son, not so much. However, I'm still working 4 days a week (NHS) so in reality, all that's changed for me is that I don't do school runs and I can't see my friends and extended family.

DD and I are both home birds anyway so to be forced to spend more time in a place that we're happiest isn't really a problem. I really feel for people who are experiencing financial difficulties, loneliness, boredom and the myriad of other issues the lockdown has caused.

It can be lovely - for many it is just a holiday. It is good that people are happy and not suffering - although that can only apply to a minority of the population longer term.

This, however, combined with the fear factor, might make it difficult to restart. Why would anyone go back to work, send the kids to school, restart a difficult life if they don't have to. The govt might have to use a combination of stick/carrot.

Me - I'm ok at home pottering but my savings are decreasing by the day and I have no income. I will lose the house eventually. Ex Dp is ok, kids/teens not so much.

I am enjoying it. I’m retired so no work to worry about. No children to keep entertained. The only downside is that we have some holidays booked which we likely won’t be able to take.

No, I'm bored shitless. Want my freedom back. Sitting in the house watching box sets is fine for a fortnight, but this has been far too long.

Especially when we're in the period of the year with maximum daylight.

Life is better. I’m a single mum and I don’t have to rush. I can supervise school work, run or cycle, clean my house, redecorate...

Once I realised what lockdown/furlough meant, I took the view this was my one and only chance to be a stay at home mum and I was going to make the most of it.

I’ll be happy to go back to work, and there are days when I crave company but in the whole it has been a chance to rest, spend time together with my DS and get the house and garden straight.

For those who are bereaved or struggling, I am sorry, I know it doesn’t help.

I have fleeting moments when I miss the outside world, and of course I am aware of the horrors that many of our nhs workers, sick, and bereaved families are facing.

However, personally, I am quite content. It’s nice not to feel the pressure to be constantly doing something. And being able to sleep in later and start my evenings earlier with no commute either side is great.

I started off thinking it was fine. I was actually engaging with DP [who has a history of not listening/remembering anything I say, so over the last few years I decided there wasn't much point in conversation].
But during lockdown we have been chatting, doing quizzes, talking on our walks etc...
All good.

Then the other day it was obvious again that he wasn't listening to me. The topic wasn't important, I give you that, but I always listen to him no matter what rubbish he may come out with.

So I stopped in mid sentence and he had no idea. He eventually twigged [felt the daggers I think!!!], looked up from his phone and asked me what was up. I explained he hadn't been listening to me and he managed to repeat an earlier part of our conversation.
I then asked him about the last bit and he couldn't say anything about it.

Then he immediately did a tit for tat thing and threw many accusations at me. All very childish in my opinion and NOT the point of my issue. His not listening/hearing has caused a MASSIVE rift over the last few years - and throughout out 30 years of marriage.

So here I am withdrawn again and wishing he would just piss off.
And now there's likely to be several more weeks of it.

We are trying to make the best of it but pretty bored. We live in London because we enjoy the nightlife, going out to eat, seeing friends and having access to museums, theatres etc. Yes we can find things to do at home but it’s not the same. We can go for nice walks as we live in a very green leafy area but I’m bored. We have friends who live in small towns/more rurally who haven’t seen much difference to their day to day life as they weren’t going out several times a week before.

Oh and we are stressed because of DH’s work and potential for redundancies at the end of this.

It has been good for but then I have a job that I love that I have been able to do from home, a very nice understanding and protective employer, a child that studies long hours without much prompting and can keep a very active social life over the internet.

It is however not the same for a huge number of families and I think it is unreasonable to make a fuss of how good it has been for us when so many people are struggling with financial worries, abusive situations and being cut from any social interaction.

I'm really missing what i would normally do, if the weather was so nice as it has been. If it had have been a usual year weather wise I would agree.

I can see how people who are off work and have slowed down would enjoy it, though.

I have found it very challenging (fooking hard) looking after kids and still trying to do my job from home. Feel like I cant give either my full attention. On the plus side I haven't missed the commute and have saved some money.

I love it too. We have an expensive lifestyle and actually I don’t miss it, one of the main reasons is that I don’t feel like I should be doing anything eg going on expensive holidays, eating at expensive restaurants, after work drinks etc, and the fact that no one else is doing these things either makes it all the more palatable. But I do worry about the economy in the aftermath, we are hoping to sell out house in the next few years and need to get what we paid for it back at the top of the market. And obviously the underlying reason for being under lockdown is quite worrying. Aside from all of that, I love being at home, much more than I thought I would.

People's happiness in lockdown is largely governed by their situation I think. If you don't work and have a reasonable sized living space it's probably fine. If you are trying to be parent, teacher, carer of the elderly and employee all at the same time, in a tiny flat with no outside space then probably not so much.

I'm loving it too, I'm missing my wider family but are lucky enough to have our youngest daughter and toddler granddaughter living with us.
We're lucky in that as a family we haven't been affected negatively either financially or health wise. It's so relaxing compared to our usual day to day life. I haven't been bored once and love our daily walks. The only thing I miss is time to myself. I'm quite a sociable person but occasionally I love a day to myself and that's only happened twice since lockdown. Our daughter is a nurse so she's out four days a week, me and my husband are working from home (with a toddler to help ) . My husband is going to start going into the office twice a week from next week so I'll be getting some time to myself when our granddaughter is at her dad's house.

Life is pretty much the same for us. We are both working from home which is great and means we have a routine to follow.

I'm not missing the morning routine of getting kids out for school or the commute dropping them off.

We have saved £1000 a month in march and April - I've no idea where our money went! We are saving petrol, probably £120 a month, no football for ds but thats only £14 a month. We are not going to the shops much but when we do are spending over £200. Take away every other week which is about the same.

I could do this for another 4 weeks then start to get back to normal for june/july so we can take our uk break in august.

Worried about family member who is not getting the medical treatment they need, sad that I may not be able to visit my father (abroad) before he dies. But also very happy to see how much healthier dh is looking now he doesn't have a 4 hour daily commute.

As for me, work is more stressful under current circumstances and I have been told I will lose half my income in the autumn due to cut-backs, but otherwise I'm fine. I can still work, dh and me and adult children all get on, I love my garden and my tropical fish and we have plenty of books, I keep in contact with colleagues via the internet and skype them regularly: the risks of my ever getting bored are very low indeed.

I miss the countryside and my office, but I have a lot to be thankful for.

We both used to travel a lot for work, so this is the longest we have actually been together at home. Both WFH and enjoying cooking together in the evenings.

He is perfectly happy and I now have a schedule of daily walks and social events via Zoom. In a thirty year relationship, I had not actually spotted that he is an introvert.

We are both very aware that we are luckier than many https://www.ft.com/content/e4334e46-890b-11ea-a01c-a28a3e3fbd33

Two of the biggest divides are between those with income protection and those without and those who are living in nice conditions, (space, garden, lovely partner), and those who are not.

It isn't fair. Sooner or later is a situation is unfair enough for long enough there is a response to that.

No its shit. Try working full time from home with a 3 year old with no outside space. It's not a holiday for a lot of people. It is so tough.

Also spare a thought for the people trapped in DV situations. Or the shielding group who know that if they caught the virus it would likely kill them. Or the NHS workers who go out to work every day wondering of they will catch corona and be seriously ill. The same with supermarket workers who are paid a pittance for putting their health on the line so people can have food.

Also the amount of people who have been made redundant already and may lose their homes.

I am fed up of seeing posts of "makingmemories and #soblessed on social media of people with gardens, a stable home life and no financial worries.

I'm much happier at home. I compare my life now to this time last year and it's worlds apart.

I'm a teacher, so I'm still working from home, recording videos explaining concepts to pupils, setting work, responding to emails, etc. I'm also "teaching" year 5 dd2 (dd1 is a uni student, home for lockdown but obviously managing her own workload). Dh is still working from home. We've settled into a pretty decent routine.

I have less work to do. Not because I'm spending less time per class, but because I had a year 13 class who had 3 hours a week of teaching but took 5-6 hours a week planning and marking. So that's 8 hours a week I've got back, through no fault or choice of my own. It feels much more relaxed as a result, although I am very worried about my vulnerable pupils and about when/how we can go back to school.

I appreciate that I'm one of the luckiest people in the current situation. We haven't lost any money (dh is getting more money because he's in online retail and people are ordering more from their websites and he's working overtime from home), we quite like each other (most of the time), and we have enough space to let both of us work from home without too much encroaching on each others space (he has the living room, dd2 and I share the dining room). Others aren't so lucky. My sister is really struggling, she's lost her job, and although she is on UC (was top ups, not fully reliant on it) she also now has bigger utility bills, larger food bill, etc because her and the 2 kids are at home all the time. She's also much more sociable than I am so she's struggling more with the lack of contact with others. My brother has been furloughed, and doesn't know if his job will still be there when furlough ends, there isn't the work around for them. He's struggling with that worry, but enjoying the time at home as much as he can.

I do think it’s dependent on work situation what’s yours OP? I am much busier than normal and finding the work/home balance difficult to achieve. Also worrying a lot about secondary school dcs education. But I know we’re luckier than many because we’ve still got jobs. I personally much prefer my old life.

Two of the biggest divides are between those with income protection and those without and those who are living in nice conditions, (space, garden, lovely partner), and those who are not.

That ^ with bells on. It is nice only if you are (financially) safe and comfortable.

We are loving it but I think DH particularly has been practising social distancing his entire life I think some of it is the pressure about what we should be doing is off. I always felt slightly guilty about doing sod all even though it's my natural state of being, but now I can do it unashamedly.

Eeyoresstickhouse _ I agree. Those loving this are mostly able to do so because of those who are going through hell.

The lovely dinners that "DH and cook together" are only possible because other people, (low-paid) are working extra hard. The "we have bought puzzles and garden toys" - same. The "we are saving so much on DC extra-curricular activities and eating out" means three or four self-employed or small businesses have lost their income.

It cannot go on. (I understand it had to happen but how we get out of it is going to be crucial).