To be really fed up with my friend.

[Ilovecats23]

I might be being unreasonable so please tell me if I am, but if not tell me how to approach this.

My best friend has lately been really difficult to talk to. Obviously with lockdown life is feeling a lot more difficult at the moment and sometimes I’m having a really bad day, but she always has to say that her day/life/child is worse.
Every single time we talk (multiple times a day) she complains about something, and I try my absolute best to be supportive and offer advice, but if I complain about anything she just says ‘at least you haven’t got my life’ or ‘I’d swap with you but then you’d be worse off’.

Personally I wouldn’t say either of us have it worse, life is just difficult and some days one of us has been screamed at by a toddler all day while the other has had a pretty quiet day, but it’s starting to feel like a constant competition.

I honestly can’t take much more of it, I don’t want to lose her as a friend but I’m starting to dread talking to her, and I don’t have many other people that I’m close to.

AIBU? What should I do? Should I say something? I don’t want to start any arguments or anything so I’m tempted to just leave it, but I also don’t know if I can handle it for much longer, it’s draining.

Oh God OP, you need to cut back on contact or this will drag on forever.

I have a friend like this, everything is harder for her and easier for me. I have spent hours listening to her moaning about stuff and have given her the space to rant about a subject that she pretty much brought on herself, although I would never say that to her. Then last week I had something to moan about and I got the subtle but not subtle enough smirk and eye roll and she changed subject.

This is not a friendship.

If you describe somebody as being all doom and gloom that means they are depressed.

That is simply not true. Pathologising someone's dour character traits as a mental illness is spectacularly unhelpful - for the person themselves and then for those who are genuinely suffering with mental health problems.

@MartySouth when I said my friend is all doom and gloom, in as she looks for the worse in most things just to have a good shit stir, she likes a good gossip about people therefore I don't trust her. She never asks me how I am, always goes on about herself. She is very rude if I want to talk about something positive, and just wants to talk about herself. I thought to myself, after many years, enough is enough. She is toxic .