To tell my neighbour to STOP

[Helpmememe]

23:05 neighbours been doing DIY since early afternoon. For a few months now is he building the fucking Trojan horse and usually it ends about 8.
Lovely neighbour each time we see each other we don't have much conversation as he's not into the whole small talk kind of man, lives alone, has kids every now and then.
Don't know how to ask him to kindly NOT be drilling and hammering at 11pm at night, it's a terraced house so his walls are basically mine.
We both have kids so you'd think he'd have the consideration of kids sleeping!
It doesn't wake my kids but it keeps me awake and they get up at 6am!
I don't want to start a neighbour feud but don't think I can take this for however much longer he needs to finish his Noah's ark.

Tell him it woke a child and you are really sorry but they don’t sleep well as it is, so could he please not do any such repairs etc on the adjoining wall between houses after 9pm. He’ll probably have more sympathy if he thinks he woke a child. But I think just being apologetic about asking while you ask but still being direct will help.

Bang on the door like the four horsemen! What an arse.

Definitely tell him to stop! Also tell him that you expect him to be courteous enough to wait until at least 8am before he starts up again!

Maybe he doesn't realise just how much it's carrying?

I think the hard part is because we hardly talk anyways if I suddenly knock on and our first real conversation is going to be my "complaint" it'll be even more awkward. We both own our homes so I don't see anyone moving anytime soon - not wise to start a bad relationship?

Also I heard all the abuse his ex gave him hence he now lives alone - so I also feel sorry for him.

Sigh

Just let him know the noise is carrying through. Get grouchy the 2nd time around.

Can you put a note through (polite) unsigned, saying the late night DIY is causing concern amongst the neighbours and if he could finish at 8pm that would be most appreciated?
Sounds a bit wimpy but then even if he sees you he will think you are just the messenger. I bet other people can hear it too.

Just speak to him, nicely, like a normal person.

Just speak to him, nicely, like a normal person.

This ^^

Whats wrong with telling the truth?

Hiya, your diy is keeping me awake, the children get up early so im suffering!
Can we come to an arrangement around timings?
Thank you.

And leave your number on it should he want to discuss.

Most people will be helpful, most of the time.

As we should be social distancing, a note is best imo.

Please don't put a note in his door.

Give him a knock tomorrow, it’s thoughtless of him to be making loud noise so late but it’s possible he doesn’t realise how much the sound travels or lost track of time. Just be very civil, polite but matter of fact and explain you have kids in bed and can he please stop with the loud noises after Xpm. Most reasonable people will get it.
You could post a note but there’s a chance it might be misinterpreted as pass agg and he’s more likely to listen if there’s a human face asking rather than a note.
Standing a safe distance from his door of course!

Nooo - please don't put an unsigned note in through his door. How dreadful. Just speak to him.

Yes, ignore my note idea. I'm a wuss but thinking on it that might make him feel pretty bad. Ignore!

God you're patient.!
I would have been round at 10pm clutching a pint of gin and crying piteously

As we should be social distancing, a note is best imo.

What? Because the OP doesn't know how to knock on a door and stand 2 metres back?

I once made a bit of noise (sanding a wall after the first coat of paint!) and didn't realise it was so late. My neighbour, who I didn't know by name, knocked on the wall and I stopped. I felt bad for making such a racket, not the other way around :)

I took better notice of the time after that.

In my block of flats, we aren't allowed to do DIY after 5.30 pm, or on Saturday afternoons or Sundays. Obviously that won't apply to your house, but I think it works as a good general rule of thumb as to what is inconsiderate and what isn't. And your neighbour is being inconsiderate.

Agree with others that you should knock on his door. You could ask him how long he expects his DIY works to carry on for, and if it's more than a day, tell him how much it's screwing with your life and sleep and please can he not do it after 7 pm.

Just ask in a normal neighbourly manner, if he would keep the noise levels down, and have a reasonable cut off time of working. Some people are not self aware of the annoying things that they choose to do.
Being polite about these things that annoy you, is better than an aggrieved rant at someone.

I have a neighbour who's been doing DIY for years, it's literally one project after another. We've had to say something to him occasionally.

He's always been fine, I think he genuinely doesn't realise how noisy his power tools can be. I'd do as PP's said and let your neighbour know that you can hear the noise late at night, it's disturbing the children, etc.

The good news is that our neighbour's putting his house on the market in the near future.

Ask him to stop using his power tools after x time, eg 8pm, as as this is when your children go to bed and they’re struggling to sleep.

Saturday afternoons or Sundays?

That's really limiting. If you work full time, Monday - Friday, you'd never have time to get anything done. I think all day Saturday and at least part of Sunday is reasonable. 5.30/6 is a good cut off.

If you work full time, Monday-Friday, you’d have Saturday & Sunday to enjoy the peace & quiet of your own home. So some consideration on doing works during the weekend is not unreasonable.

I never understand threads like this. You are a grown adult with children , surely you are capable of going round and asking your neighbour nicely if he could stop DIY by x time? why do you need people to advise you on this? What are you expecting to hear? This is just part of adult life. You dont need to go round and be uppity and aggressive and there is no need for it to affect neighbourly relations unless he chooses that. In which case you have already said you hardly speak to him so who cares ? He's the one in the wrong.

Why would anyone suggest an unsigned note? Or any note for that matter? It's so passive aggressive. Can people really not have simple face to face discussions without being terrified/mortally offended etc?

Just give him a knock, stand back, and when he answers say, "Hi, how are you? (Insert a few more pleasantries if you wish.) Could we agree a time that your DIY will stop please, as it's keeping us awake? I was thinking around 8 p.m. would be reasonable..." There is absolutely no reason why this should set off World War 3.