Re people loitering and dithering in shoos

[Carbosug]

With one way systems, social distancing, people queuing outside AIBU to wish people would make an effort to move as quickly as possible up and down the aisles.

Standing for ages deliberating between products, phoning your oh to check what brand of marmalade they prefer, or standing for ages checking a shopping list in a narrow aisle where people need to pass is inconsiderate.

These aren't normal times and most people have adjusted the way they shop accordingly.
But you still get the oblivious faffers and delayers.

I do get frustrated with ditherers at the best of times. When I go shopping I like to get in, get out, job done.

Having said that in the first few weeks of lockdown I was doing both my weekly shop and my parents (over 70) weekly shop at the same time to avoid multiple trips. I’d have one big trolley and put their shopping one end and my shopping the other to keep track of what was for who while walking round the aisles with 2 big lists and having to stop and check I’d got everything at certain points. I was mindful of where I stopped though and who was around me. It’s been stressful. Thankfully we’ve been able to get click and collect slots the last 3 weeks so it’s been ok.

I went to my local Tesco at 6.30 this evening (usually quiet time) and was surprised that a) there was a queue of about 6 people and b) we were all allowed in one after another.
I asked the Door Guardian why and she said she had to hold the queue back for a while a one customer was taking a very long time to choose his potatoes (which are right at the entrance) and no one could get past him!

You need to find something better to do with your life. Perhaps find a way of helping than expecting people to adhere to your exacting standards.

Are you like this in other areas of your life? Results oriented, no empathy type. Everyone is different. You need to understand your own style and weaknesses of it. This post is an example of one of them.

My sister had a severe allergy. She has to pick up the packages and check ingredients to make sure it won’t kill her. Even more so at the moment with her normal safe brands often not being available

I think you need to chill out. Or just stay home and get everything delivered! People are doing the best they can you sound neurotic. It is what it is.

In most cases I'd say YABU but this week I got stuck behind a lady that picked up 8 packets of hot cross buns and I couldn't get around her because the aisle was too narrow. They were the same brand. Ffs

YABU.

It's understandable to feel irritated however there are lots of reasons that people dither. Shopping for others, social anxiety and other invisible issues. I hate my own invisible issues as you wouldn't think about them if neither you or anyone you were close to had experienced them. I have been to a supermarket once since lockdown and it was incredibly stressful - I was one of the ditherers, I was trying not to be in the way of other people and not have a meltdown which just meant I was stood still trying to calm myself at one point.
I ended up not even looking at the Frozen section because I panicked and just wanted to be done ASAP.

You wouldn't be able to tell by looking at me that I have any issues - I've only got vision in one eye, have coordination issues, my hands can shake and my right hand has a lower amount of dexterity... all of which tends to be more pronounced if I'm stressed.

What's the hurry???! It's not like we don't have hours of time to ourselves at the moment! People are doing 5000 piece jigsaws to entertain themselves, waiting a few extra minutes in a shop with a strange new system that some people are struggling to get their heads around, won't cause much distress to your "busy" day!

Yerroblemon you might have hours to while away but some people are not only still working full time but are doing longer hours as they try to respond to a constantly changing environment. Many of those are also helping out others who are vulnerable or trying to manage elderly parents health and other issues from a distance. Many people will, in fact have less free time than usual as well as being under extra stress at work and at home. But lucky you having all those hours to fill.

@allthembuckets

And it’s for people like you and others in similar that my heart goes out to in these situations and why a bit of care and patience goes a long way.

OP I’m sure the majority don’t go to a supermarket in these times to deliberately loll around enjoying a good browse as nothing better to do.

I work full time, homeschool kids so can only get there Sat am. I need to be quick as loads of domestics I can’t do in week and meals to plan. But I’m also shopping for others and haven’t a clue where some of their unfamiliar items are. So I will reverse and miss stuff. Additionally I usually shop online and can’t now so have to get used to store layout and usually have husband texting random missing items whilst I’m walking round.

I like to get the job done but equally the journey is just as important- I do my best to not tread on everyone else along the way.

Many of us are shopping for elderly neighbours. We have lists, not pictures of the products, the lists are never in any logical order and it can be difficult to find the correct items and nearly impossible to choose substitutions. Whenever I read a thread now complaining about what was substitued for something unacceptable in an online shop my sympathies are 100% with the pickers.

Countrygirl99, the majority of people are either off, "furloughed" or "wfh". Obviously if you work in the healthcare profession then yes, you will still be working and for that we are v grateful. And apologies for assuming everyone is stuck at home bored of cleaning out our cutlery drawers etc.

The majority are not off

I don’t know a single person wfh or furloughed and I’m not healthcare

There’s hundreds of jobs still going

yerroblemon I don't work in healthcare. There are millions of people still working outside healthcare. Virtually all my friends are still working and only a couple are in healthcare. Many are wfh, but I can assure you that doesn't mean a holiday for most,. I often get my first phone call of the day around 7 when I'm out on my walk. And although I try and make sure I log off by 5.30, in the morning I will be dealing with emails that colleagues have sent late into the evening. We are dealing with constant firefighting as colleagues go off sick/isolate /sites need deep cleaning etc and now we are trying to second guess what will happen when lockdown eases so we can plan for it. Tasks that usually take a few minutes a week are taking 2-3 hours a day. Tasks that didn't used to exist are taking 3-4 hours a day.

Countrygirl99, the majority of people are either off, "furloughed" or "wfh". Obviously if you work in the healthcare profession then yes, you will still be working and for that we are v grateful. And apologies for assuming everyone is stuck at home bored of cleaning out our cutlery drawers etc

Oh you're one of those people who's decided that working from home isn't working.

There are also millions of people working in keyworker roles which are not medical.

We have a toddler with allergies so need to double check ingredients if the brand's we know are okay are not available. But we do try to be quick about it and prefer to do the bulk of our shop online, delivery slots allowing. But we've had a few with loads of missing basics and then had to go out anyway. Try to be as quick as possible. I assume a good chunk of people dithering are doing the same, or are just stressed by the whole experience.

YAB very U, why this pressure for us all to whizz around because you can't wait five minutes? You can't go back if you forget something, you can't go out more than once a day - no such thing as nipping to the shops for something you've run out of, you've got to get it right first time. Sometimes I like to check the ingredients of products, or compare prices or refer to a list. I've waited in the queue like everone else including you.

, the majority of people are either off, "furloughed" or "wfh".

“WFH” - you’re implying that means not actually working. DH is “wfh”! And boy is he working! I only see him between 8 and 5 if I take him a cup of tea or we cross paths on the stairs during a “bathroom break”.

I go into school a couple of days a week and also do a couple of hours a day “wfh” (I am only employed part time anyway).

I don’t know anyone who has been furloughed but I do know plenty of people WORKING from home and/or GOING To work which IS allowed where it can be done safely.

“WFH” - you’re implying that means not actually working. DH is “wfh”! And boy is he working! I only see him between 8 and 5 if I take him a cup of tea or we cross paths on the stairs during a “bathroom break”.

Thank you! Like you DH I and my whole department (non-clinical NHS hospital department) are wfh and we most definitely are working. Many of us are doing a lot more than our usual hours to make sure the work coming in to us gets done. Not everyone in "healthcare" is a doctor or nurse and has to go to the hospital to do their job.

I wfh usually 2 days a week and it has been implied that it's not really working 🙄 I start earlier and finish later quite often when wfh which doesn't tend to happen in the office as I was reliant on bus schedules so couldn't work 30 mins late.
Now hopefully my whole team realise that as we're all wfh every day now.

You also have people - like us yesterday - who haven't actually been to the shops since before lock down and are experiencing all this for the first time and trying to learn a new system others may have become familiar with now.

Every so often a thread comes along that astounds me

In that I can’t believe people get annoyed about something so minor and inconsequential

And here is another gem