WIBU to report them?

[thatmakesmehappy]

We live in a nice semi-rural area. It's a lovely community focussed village, and on the whole we get on with our neighbours well, or just ignore each other, which works well. We have 3 young kids (6,4,2y) and since lockdown have been using the garden non stop. Our garden isn't that big, and backs straight onto the house behind us.

Now onto the issue. The house behind is a young couple with 2 young kids, one must be 3ish and the other 1 and a half ish. The male of the house smokes weed in the garden. We started noticing it around November time and he does it most evenings. It didn't really bother us too much as the kids were in bed and not using the garden late at night, but since lockdown and the nice weather, and I guess he's home more at the minute, he's now doing it in the day and at night. We've had to stop using the garden and close the house up because it stinks and we don't want the kids exposed to it. It's every day now and it's driving me round the bend. I think it's inconsiderate knowing that their neighbours on every side have kids and have been using their gardens lots in this nice weather. Plus, he's smoking with their back door open so their house must stink of it too and their kids must be exposed.

Now, we have no idea what their circumstances are, if maybe he has some sort of condition what allows him to do it legally, or maybe he has a very stressful job (not sure why that would excuse him doing something illegal but some may thing that's okay) and I should mind my own beeswax.

Now onto my WIBU, WIBU to report them? Not only because it pisses me off, but also because it must also be affecting their children too? Or should I just get on with it and live and let live.

How bad can it be really? We share a few small joints from late afternoon and in the evening, outside for all of about 5 minutes every few hours, we always try to do it when its quiet and people aren't in their gardens.

All those people on here that think its ok to smoke weed around children are vile.

I don't see why the OP should have to take her children in during the day because someone else is smoking illegal drugs.

If he stuck to the night time to smoke then yes let it go, but the fact that he is smoking it in the middle of the day is wrong!

I'm not anti weed btw, if you want to smoke dope then do, but not in the middle of the day with children playing in their gardens! I bet all those who are saying that they don't see a problem would be all over a thread saying how terrible a bonfire or bbq is!

The police don't care about weed, my neighbours smoke it constantly so my house ends up stinking. Unless they're supplying the police don't give a toss. That's my experience anyway. The smell is awful isn't it, I hate it that my kids know what weed smells like, because of the dicks next door!

It's literally just a plant. Why does it matter if your kids know what it smells like? 😂

I think it's grim as well and frankly shocked by the hypocrisy on here (glass of wine of an evening? You're an alcoholic! A bit overweight? You're a lazy, greedy slob! Drug addict? You carry on and anyone who says otherwise is uptight!). Anyway, I wouldn't report it as I don't think anyone would care but it is disgusting and smells horrible to the small minority of us who don't indulge in casual drug use.

'Look, I need to tell you something - you can smell your weed from the end of the street. I'd take it indoors if I were you, there are some people round here who'll call the police for the slightest thing and I'd hate for you to get into trouble'.

Perfect.

And if he didn't stop I would report it. The things MN gets wound up about, and yet filling someone's house and garden with weed fumes and exposing children to it is OK But then I'm of the view that illegal drug use is something you should grow out of at university at the latest.

One of our neighbours used to do it and it stunk and in summer had to close all windows or out house stunk
The smell travels quite far

YABU
My neighbour smokes cigarettes and a couple of times a week a cigar. The smell of either is vile but it’s their garden and there’s nothing I can do about it. I also don’t appreciate my neighbours bbq smells gets in my house when windows are open either but it would never cross my mind to report someone over a smell they made in their garden

Report it ,but I doubt the po!ice will do.anything half my estate smoke it and the police are always walking up.and down nothing gets done

The smell is disgusting and it's an illegal drug, you're entirely justified not to want your kids exposed to it. I like the suggestion above that you frame it as 'just so you know you can smell it'. I'd be properly annoyed if my neighbours stopped me from using my garden like that.

The police will do precisely zero about someone having a spliff in their own garden, whether you dislike the smell or not.

It's disgusting and it's illegal. As pp said, some people are such massive hypocrites. It's not ok to do drugs around your children. It's not ok to involve other people on your habit when they've got no escape. Gross, disrespectful.

You're probably wasting your time on here OP. On here smoking normal cigs brings out the pitchforks. Smoking stinking weed is perfectly acceptable.

It really is a vile smell. Stand behind someone in a shop with the stuff on them and the shop people spray air freshener when they've gone.

Op, how often is he doing this? No one smokes joints continuously it’s not like cigarettes and if he did that he would be zombied permanently

So I’m guessing he has a joint at one point in the day and maybe one in the evening, which what, takes him ten mins to smoke?

Cmon now.

No, there really are people who smoke it constantly. Its naive to think there isn't probably makes them better parents like.

No one is smoking it constantly. Even twenty a day is not constantly.

If it annoys you just talk to them. Wtf are you going to report them for. Neighbours are going crazy! Everyone reporting eachother. Just communicate for god sake.

I wouldn't report them as I don't think the police will do much about someone smoking weed in their own garden.
I would just go round and be honest, say its never been a problem really but obviously now you and the kids are wanting to use the garden but the smell is drifting over and it's unpleasant.

I think it's grim as well and frankly shocked by the hypocrisy on here (glass of wine of an evening? You're an alcoholic! A bit overweight? You're a lazy, greedy slob! Drug addict? You carry on and anyone who says otherwise is uptight!).

Whilst I agree with the premise, you have ironically called anyone smoking weed a drug addict, you are doing the exact same thing you accuse others of doing.

I wouldn’t tbh, the police won’t do anything and it cause problems with the neighbour and no one wants drama like that. We have a neighbour that occasionally smokes it, it’s not the end of the world.

YANBU. I wouldn’t tell them, I’d just report it to the police.

The sorts of drug taking people who happily break the law to get their fix are not the sort of people who will take kindly to you having a word. Don’t make yourself a target for their low morals.

On here smoking normal cigs brings out the pitchforks. Smoking stinking weed is perfectly acceptable.

So your aversion is to strong smells, doesn't this take it down the rabbit whole of anti smoking threads where people don't like distinct perfume etc, I can imagine the hoops you will jump through to call someone out that they didn't like standing behind someone because of strong smells of food/perfume/body odure etc.

I quite like the smell tbh, I'd rather smell weed that fags.

Is it really any worse than the huge amount of people that drink a bottle of wine with kids about? At least he's doing it in the garden, not enclosed in the house around his kids.

It's a waste of police time asking them to do something that you could essentially do yourself.

Speak to him and ask if he would mind not smoking weed in the garden during the day as that's where your kids are playing.

No need to report.

@heartsonacake - that's rather a sweeping generalisation! I don't have low morals thank you very much I have suffered with night terrors since my early teens, several a night. I've had sleep studies done, been prescribed everything from antidepressants to bloody epilepsy medication and none of it worked. Smoking a bit of weed before bed works, I don't wake everyone in the house with blood-curdling screams several times a night every night. I'm not smoking it constantly and I try my best to be considerate and not smoke when people are in their gardens, I don't want to upset anyone I just want to sleep.