Irritated, irritable and irritating. AIBU to be tolerant in RL and tell them to get fucked on this thread.

[fuckinghellthisshit]

IABU. Unreasonable and I know it.

I am just so fucking irritated at the moment. Everything is grinding my gears. DD's constant fucking exercising, DS leaving his shit everywhere, DH's following me around and just fucking breathing everywhere.
I am being a model of kindness and tolerance but I do wish every bastard one of them would fuck off.

And face timing my DGM97 every day at exactly 6pm to watch her slowly lose her shit (she's been in lockdown for 6 weeks already) and become unkempt is horrendous. Arguing with her for hours about politics (she lives for these debates and asks for robust challenging - good for her mh she says) is exhausting. I just want to lie down, I don't care what Mark fucking Steel is saying today - he can get fucked too.

My mean GD97 who has been living in isolation for 40 years and never wanted a visit or call but suddenly needs the warmth and kindness of his family - well the women in his family, and I am especially sought after as the busiest person. Fuck you mean old man, you are alone for a reason! you made your miserable lonely bed now lie in it!

My normally sane DM is in full lunatic mode, needing constant love and reassurance, leave me alone! I am your child! What about me! Why not rind one of my many bastarding twat brothers. And stop cooking for 12-18 people - there are only 2 of you there - that's why you're getting so fat - not stress hormones.

My tribe of idiot brothers who all refused to accept there was any problem and spouted full Trump rhetoric until my DGM's neighbour died and then had massive mantrums demanding I send them all food. Get fucked!
.
I love these people so very much. I also loved my small business and working, and being on my own a bit. I care so much, but I want a break and a vent. So here, in the safety of MN, I will tell them all to get fucked.

Thank you, I feel so much better now.

www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200421-why-zoom-video-chats-are-so-exhausting

Woke up hurting from the left shoulder to my little toe, which wasn't helped by the standard cooking, cleaning, feeding, queuing and shopping. Every time I try for a sit down the poor bastard dog, bored to tears with no drives out or visitors or visiting, wants me to go out and play ball in the garden. Teenager treats every interruption to eg be given food as a huge fucking imposition on my part. Now DH is sitting downstairs making cracks about how I've been welded to the sofa all day, so it's my turn to get up to give him rhubarb and custard.
Rhubarb and custard, by Christ. It'll be laced with strychnine next time, you mark my words.

Will this disappear if it’s not moved? I really want to revisit this thread and don’t want it to have a time limit! It’s like reading the inside of my head!

@Dowser My son is in a similar situation. His school has decided not to cancel, but postpone Prom.

I know it won't be the same as having it in June, but hopefully he'll get to actually meet his mates again, rather than just texting/chatting/etc.

I think AIBU doesn’t vanish, @Inarightpickleandpreserve.

That’s great thanks as this is one of those things that will never fail to make me laugh! Some things never get old and the comments on here are definitely in that category!

Can I have a rant??
Although I'm isolating alone I haven't escaped the RAGE.
Dear Mum, I know you're unwell. I know trips to the hospital have been scary. But please don't complain when they want you to stay because they don't have transport to take you home, and you moan that much they agree to you getting a fucking taxi ffs. You are high risk. Why the fuck do you so desperately want to be at home ? I know its not to be with your DH! I know this because every fucking time I call you you are slagging him off! HE CAN HEAR YOU!! Don't complain to me you are lonely again, PLEASE. I haven't seen another living soul for FOUR COCKING WEEKS 😪. You may well live with a twat, but you have known this for years Mum. You have had a choice to stay or go for those years! Your lockdown is really no different to any other time for either of you! Neither of you normally leave the house except for your health appointments!!
So for the love of my sanity STOP TELLING ME YOU'RE LONELY!!
Dear siblings, take a turn with checking in on mum please. My mental health is at breaking point and I cannot do this every single cunting day!!! 😫😫😫😫

Feeling slightly better 😊
Thank you all for the laughs

I have decided that I am not bloody cooking today. I tend to do the things that take more chopping and preparation - like the seafood laksa we had yesterday or the pork sweet and sour from the night before - and tonight was supposed to be home made sausage meatballs in tomato sauce, with pasta.

But I cannot face the thought of making sausage meat into stupid little balls, frying the little fuckers, chopping onions and celery and making a cocking tomato sauce to cook the little fucker meatballs in, and having it all ready so all someone has to do tonight is to heat it up and cook pasta.

So I have told dh we are having carbonara tonight - he is happy to make that (and it is delicious), so I do not care one whit that the meatball pasta would have been much healthier, and packed with veggies, while the carbonara will go straight to my hips and stomach.

Behold the field in which my fucks grow - see how it is barren. I have not a single fuck to give.

'What's for lunch'
😑

For those of you sick of cooking, If you haven't tried Simply Cook, it's a Godsend. They send you 4 recipes a month, they provide the pastes/herbs/spices, you just buy the fresh ingredients ( usually not more than 4 ), they take about 20 mins to cook and taste pretty good!

Link here

www.simplycook.com/landing/PPCB?utm_source=PPC&utm_medium=Brand&utm_campaign=Brand&KW=10001&gclid=CjwKCAjw-YT1BRAFEiwAd2WRti0LWMPhjfkXyI2SV7859JtTKq9rU_NfaEnyLOpvJiLJibpd4-45yxoCePoQAvD_BwE

Behold the field in which my fucks grow - see how it is barren. I have not a single fuck to give.
Fabulous

I can’t take credit, @nearlynermal - I got it from a FB meme.

Jesus bastarding fuck, do NOT moan to me that I bought too many of the crisps you like, eat those, then tear into a bag I bought for myself and cunting well finish them off before I've had a sniff of them, then get arsey about watching people go to the shop for unnecessary items like, er, crisps.
We're not actually short of crisps. For now. But it's the thin end of the wedge. He insisted the other day that he didn't want me buying him any more alcohol. This is fine, but he's getting dangerously close to finishing all the wine he had in the house.We like different things usually, but see crispgate above and you'll understand why I might get twitchy.

Cleaning, or more to the point NOT cleaning the bathroom is my current bugbear. If you wipe the sink and the loo after you’ve used it, especially after you’ve shaved then it stays reasonably ok, if however you think the bloody cleaning fairy does it and don’t bother then it very quickly becomes gross and I don’t see why I have to clean up your shit - literally and metaphorically. And then when I ask you to do it don’t just sigh and shrug and get arsey with me. Somebody help me!!

Thanks OP I needed a thread like this. Loads of things irritating me at the moment. DH and me have stuck to the rules for the last month.
I love a walk in our (fairly local) large forest, but it’s 20 mins drive and understand that for now, it’s just not possible. Then see on the DM a load of people mingling in London last night for the 8pm Clapping!! WTF!!
I just feel bloody sick and tired of all these virtue signalling bloody idiots!!

Today I googled ‘how many people could tigers eat at a time’ but didn’t google ‘nearest tiger sanctuary’ in case the police use it as evidence against me.
Thank you for this thread

Dh is mean and won't let me have a pet tiger, @YesIDoLoveCrisps. He says it would eat us, but I think that, if I had it from a tiny cub, it would grow up civilised and be a very big house cat.

I want to snuggle with my own tiger and that bastard won't let me.

Can anyone explain why my idiot husband has bought a huge red cabbage? He went to Aldi yesterday despite us having had a food delivery as “he had no beer for the weekend “ - to be fair that was ok because he had been somewhere else that counted as “essential “ and went past Aldi on the way home. He asked if needed anything and I said just a cucumber and don’t get loads of food as the fridge and freezer are full
So home he comes bearing a huge great fuck off red cabbage looking all pleased with himself. I enquired what he plans to do with it he thought I could cook it like I do at Christmas . Now don’t get me wrong I actually do like a bit of red cabbage with my xmas dinner but I’m not sure it’s going to fit in with our Friday night curry or the BBQ we have planned for Saturday. Then he got all huffy about wasting food “in the current climate” and how upset he was going to be if I threw it away like the last one he bought (because it went mouldy) and that he was sure the dc would eat it. The DC have made their red cabbage related opinions very clear on at least an annual basis - they hate it!
So now I’ve sliced it thinly and put it in the freezer, there by putting the issue on ice (see what I did there?) and hopefully he will forget about it until xmas.
And did he get the cucumber I actually asked for? Nope

DH randomly bought a red cabbage right at the height of panic buying too. It sat in our kitchen, like some beacon of hope among the empty shelves - and after 3 attempts of fucking it up completely cooking it - it went into the bin.

Seriously - we never have red cabbage - what the fuck is it with men and symbolic red cabbages?

It makes a nice coleslaw.

Not quite the point, I agree!

This is actually a really nice Turkish slaw, would go great at a barbeque!

www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/may/23/six-of-the-best-barbecue-side-dishes

Brilliant thread, can I rant too please??

I'm on leave at the moment but DH is working from home and is almost never able to take a decent break, so I am alone with nearly 3 year old DS all day every day. I adore him but he's driving me absolute bloody batshit. He repeats inane sentences approximately 17,000 times and expects me to do the same. He refuses to engage with any "fun" activity I try to do with him, preferring instead to chuck his toys as hard as he can with a massive flourish and then voluntarily go to the naughty step. He wees himself, let's me change him, then immediately wees himself again. Sometimes he goes on to do it a third fucking time too and I end up just not bothering to put clothes back on him for the rest of the day.

We live in a flat and it feels soooo tiny. I'm sick to death of preparing food and washing up and doing it again and again. I tidy up and it's back to how it was within seconds. There is always a gigantic pile of laundry to do. While DS and I were on our daily walk earlier, as he stopped to closely examine every. Single. Fucking. Daisy and every. Single. Fucking. Dandelion, I found myself gazing around and fantasising about sneaking through the gap in the fence that I could see and just fucking off to wander the lands by myself.

That's better

God I love this thread. I’ve got a Velcro 8 year old DD who follows me everywhere it’s worse than when she was a toddler. I feel like screaming you’ve got two parents you know! I fucking hate doing school work, I’m so pissed off with DH who doesn’t even think to offer to do any of it with her, yes he does still have to go to work but not every fucking day. I have to play with her as she’s not got any siblings and I’m knackered and fed up of it I. (I also feel so guilty that she’s not got siblings). If I didn’t manage to escape for a run or bike ride on my own a few times a week, I would have probably screamed all this in real life by now.

That feels so much better.

Bloody bastard Sainsbury’s didn’t deliver my bottle of Kahlua, so I can’t try making an alcoholic coffee milkshake today.

My life is full of tragedy.