Irritated, irritable and irritating. AIBU to be tolerant in RL and tell them to get fucked on this thread.

[fuckinghellthisshit]

IABU. Unreasonable and I know it.

I am just so fucking irritated at the moment. Everything is grinding my gears. DD's constant fucking exercising, DS leaving his shit everywhere, DH's following me around and just fucking breathing everywhere.
I am being a model of kindness and tolerance but I do wish every bastard one of them would fuck off.

And face timing my DGM97 every day at exactly 6pm to watch her slowly lose her shit (she's been in lockdown for 6 weeks already) and become unkempt is horrendous. Arguing with her for hours about politics (she lives for these debates and asks for robust challenging - good for her mh she says) is exhausting. I just want to lie down, I don't care what Mark fucking Steel is saying today - he can get fucked too.

My mean GD97 who has been living in isolation for 40 years and never wanted a visit or call but suddenly needs the warmth and kindness of his family - well the women in his family, and I am especially sought after as the busiest person. Fuck you mean old man, you are alone for a reason! you made your miserable lonely bed now lie in it!

My normally sane DM is in full lunatic mode, needing constant love and reassurance, leave me alone! I am your child! What about me! Why not rind one of my many bastarding twat brothers. And stop cooking for 12-18 people - there are only 2 of you there - that's why you're getting so fat - not stress hormones.

My tribe of idiot brothers who all refused to accept there was any problem and spouted full Trump rhetoric until my DGM's neighbour died and then had massive mantrums demanding I send them all food. Get fucked!
.
I love these people so very much. I also loved my small business and working, and being on my own a bit. I care so much, but I want a break and a vent. So here, in the safety of MN, I will tell them all to get fucked.

Thank you, I feel so much better now.

I want to join in! Twin toddlers, 4 cats and DH working from home! All chaos and noise all day every fucking day, twins are brilliant but demanding. DH gets fucked off at the work laptop with alarming regularity I’m wondering if I can use him as a timer, like a baritone Big Ben, would be “shitting fucking laptop” muttered under his breath - me “time to put the chicken in” - him “bastarding thing you fucking updated twice already” - me “time to add the veggies”... and so on!

He’s actually been nice to have home (bar the muttered grievances and threats to the poor laptops existence) but I do want to scream the following:

“STOP ASKING ME WHERE EVERY-TWATTING-THING IS! USE YOUR PISSING EYES AND ENGAGE YOUR PISSING BRAIN! IF YOU BLAME ME FOR MOVING SOMETHING ONLY YOU USE ONE MORE TIME I’M GOING TO RAM IT UP YOUR ARSE!” When he inevitably finds what he’s looking for he’ll fess up at least, but it’s always with this weird, deeply unsexy guffaw. I’d not be so bothered, but he moves my belongings around all the fecking time

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius it's a tough call. Eat until you burst to show her you're the boss or stop for the sake of your family. I don't have any answers but you are hilarious and I'd like you to hang around, and enjoy a pudding. Your call.

DP's discovered a new way of being fucking irritating.

He's watching videos of motorhomes on the laptop with the volume up, because he wants to hear what they're saying about them

Mine does that all the time, too! - Any chance we could get them to Skype each other and watch the bloody things together from our respective bedrooms and then they could share their comments with each other in a really manly way and I won't be getting called over every three minutes to look at the really efficient way someone has put a sink into a van?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius I really know how you feel. My Mum has criticised me my whole life about my weight. I look back at photos when I was a teenager and I had an amazing figure. I am naturally curvy large boobs and broad hips. Back then I had a tiny waist and was very toned (very fit and active). My sister was naturally very slim and legs up to armpits. I was constantly told I wasn’t allowed to eat this and that while my sister was allowed to eat anything. I actually think her obsessive way with food around me is what caused me to gain weight. Then when I was in my 20’s I pretty much stopped eating. My weight plummeted and I went down to age 11 to 12 jeans. I constantly felt like I was about to faint. My DM obviously was so pleased and told me how well I’d done. To this day she doesn’t know how I’ll I was. Thankfully I had support from friends and then got together with my DH who further helped me through it. I am back to being very overweight. I know it’s not the healthiest, but I also know it’s a lot healthier than when I lost all the weight. Having your own DM criticise you for it I think only makes you feel worse and more inclined to go for the wrong food or go the other way like I did.

CharlieTangoBanana i see your 1 knobdog and raise you 2 knobdogs. The dicks next door have been to pick up the dog of 1 of their parents to stay for a few days for a puppy sleepover with their dog. I am sick of the fucking singsong voices from both of them -"who's a good girl?", "stop that barking you silly boy", "awww I've missed you sooooooo much".

@malificent7 I remain very angry about your Morris Dancing burden of a twat-husband.

I love you mum, but please stop telling everyone you speak to that you pay or everything it makes me feel worthless after leaving my abusive ex I’ve given you every penny I have not much but 150 quid, and 50 before towards rent and working for you for free it’s a lot to me.

When I ask you to watch my kid so I can clean, cook, go to the shop or throw out the rubbish please watch them sick of coming back with you just sat in your bed and kid running wild.

Stop stop telling me off for not putting things back perfectly just fuck off. Just put it where you want it I do a hundred things at once while entertaining a toddler I’m barely holding it together and I need to try and work.

I love you and thank you for saving me from my abusive ex but I need a little more tlc.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius clearly my kids have been round your house with their crumb trails. Honestly, I’d never lose them, I just need to follow the crumbs. And the noise. My ears are practically bleeding from the noise. Does anyone else’s kids feel the need to bellow at each other? Like living with Foghorn Leghorn

OP thank you for making me laugh! I wish eldest would shut the fuck up talking about bastarding fortnite. Honestly it is all ge talks about. I could not give one shiny shit. I real life I am the perfect mother and listen dutifully and say oh really at the appropriate places, hell I even ask questions ffs! He's the easy one. My youngest is a god damn lunatic! Talks incessantly about absolute bullshit. Asks nonsensical questions and gets livid if I dont give the answer he was looking for. He is asd so his world is very different to mine! The cat is a little shitting machine and keeps walking it through the kitchen ffs and she nicks any bloody food in sight. I love them all so much, but ffs I wish they'd all just shut up for 5 minutes.

Anyone else experiencing tinnitus due to stress? Is that even a thing? Homeschooling can fuck right off after the humdinger of an argument I had with DS on Friday over his RE project. It’s all about survival now. Just. Get. Through. The. Day.

OMG this thread is the best thing! It is pure, sweet relief. Thank you all so much

carnivalisover im so sorry but i have tears from laughter at your post

Thank you @fuckinghellthisshit and @RoseLillian - I am lucky to have you lot around, you wonderful people, you!

I’m steering clear of Skype with mum for the foreseeable, though! Thankfully she didn’t enjoy her first ever Skype call, so I doubt it will be repeated any time soon!

fuckinghellthisisshit

Indeed it is no more, gone, departed; I am not exactly sure of the method but we are one fucking shit down in the household. Its bin day tomorrow so if they refuse to empty it I’ll know what he did.

Anyone else experiencing tinnitus due to stress? Is that even a thing?

Yes and yes, Vinotinto

I have tinnitus anyway, but it's "liveable with" and I "mask" it with audible books or harp music (only instrument that works for some reason), turned down very low at bedtimes - just loud enough to hear.

The past few days it's become really seriously exacerbated - nothing masks it and it's actually painfully loud and the pitch is excruciating. And it makes me dizzy (does that sound daft?). It's like vertigo.

And many years ago my GP told method although tinnitus isn't supposed to be affected by stress, in her experience it was. (I'd made a comet very similar to yours.) It was she who suggested that I experimented with different sounds/ music/ speech until I found something that would mask it effectively.

I bloody hate it!

If I hear my husband swallow one more time I swear I'll choke him in his sleep

Also can someone please tell GPILs that when we are on zoom for the weekly torture of the family quiz that we can HEAR YOU WHISPERING THE ANSWERS AND FUCKING RUINING IT

SchadenfreudePersonified I don’t usually experience much tinnitus but it’s been very noticeable these past few weeks. Particularly when feeling overwhelmed. Thought I was going mad. Appreciate your reply.

He's watching videos of motorhomes on the laptop with the volume up, because he wants to hear what they're saying about them

I have discovered a very effective counter measure. Go to more4 and find a nice foreign language drama. Pick something in a fairly unignorable and unsoothing language like Danish or German, preferably with a lot of gunfire and some screams...

It usually irritates the fuck out f him in a matter of seconds. To which i say (with a Paddington Very Hard Stare) I’ll use MY earphones if you get yours.

Can I recommend Reuben Kaye’s weekly “Un-wine-d” - he’s on Facebook and Instagram and I think a lot of you would appreciate his guided meditation with added swearing and booze.

“Breathe in... and fuck off...” 🍷

I have a lovely, over 80 yo friend. She's great, really keen on modern technology- but since she's put herself into isolation she seems to believe she's some sort of Facebook and Twitter warrior posting so much shit every day, none of which she fact checks before passing it along. It's really starting to irrationally annoy me - I should just mute her on fb (as I have on twitter) shouldn't I?!

I checked my db earlier to see comments from a lady i used to use for a particular service ripped me to shreds for my cover picture that ive had since on my page since november 2018to spout that i shouldnt be setting sky lanterns off and how its dangerous, i fucking know this!!! I dont like them and have never used them. I told her it was disneyland tea cup ride at night and got a snarky response saying well i should of said that. She commented on the pic thats dated 2018 ffs 😂😂 and my neighbour today asked if i was pregnant... that REALLY pissed me off especially since shw knew id had a termination at xmas time and its 4 months since it tomorrow. Fuck sunday it can fuck off!!!

My boyfriend is just so loud!!! The breathing. The constant noise if he's not playing a game loudly then he's watching a loud video on his phone or learning German with the volume full blast. The clattering of pans for no reason all day fuck my life

H is currently not working.

Conversation- him ‘what do you expect me to do?’
Me ‘well help me with my job’
Him laughter and walks out.

Ffs I’m really fed up.

I don't want to do any FaceTime calls or zoomskype type shit. Why do I want to look at some cunt's boring fucking face when I don't even want to speak to them?! Shit idea. No to all quizzes and 'fun'. Would much rather stare into space or ruminate over intrusive thoughts, kwim? Nothing worse than having to act normal. And a big fucking punch to the cunt to anyone who asks me what I'm up to, what my plans are... Etc etc. Fuck. Off. A) why do you care and B) what plans you fucking spoon?!