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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can people say thanks when I run into the road for them?

306 replies

Fizzysours · 15/04/2020 11:25

I am a runner and going out once a day. I try to choose a quieter time. I ALWAYS run into the road to give pedestrians of any age plenty of safe space. It's usually really obvious to see that I have done this as our area is fairly quiet. A quarter of people say thanks or a cheery morning. By 'thanks' I mean a smile, a raised hand or ANYTHING. It would be nice if more people could manage the tiny pleasantries that make everyone's day a bit friendlier, especially when we are all so divided?

OP posts:
MoonBlood · 15/04/2020 11:29

I’m heavily pregnant and wrangling a two year old when we go for a walk so people often step into the road before we get a chance to as I’m so slow moving these days, but I always say thank you or smile. My DD has started copying me aswell which usually rewards us with a lovely smile from whoever we’re passing. You’re right, especially in the current situation you’d think people could be a bit nicer, I’m sorry you’re encountering such miseries!

Original poster
Fizzysours · 15/04/2020 11:34

See, toddlers smiling is what we need!!!! Cheers everybody up!!! 🌞🌞

OP posts:
BusterTheBulldog · 15/04/2020 11:36

I’m the same as you-it did drive me mad! But now I’ve realised that half of these new people out walking / running / cycling are just ignorant idiots so I’m resigned to it. That being said I had some lovely people say thanks yesterday, and one even moved for me for a change! So maybe there is hope

teenagetantrums · 15/04/2020 11:39

I wouldn't care if you ran close to me so l wouldn't say thank you. I would think you are running into to road so you don't come in contact with me. That's your choice.

BabyYoda · 15/04/2020 11:39

I would always say thanks or offer some sort of acknowledgement for that but people complaining about others not doing this really bothers me. I get equally annoyed by people demanding thank you letters or complaining that people don’t say good morning to each person individually as they enter the office in the morning.

In conclusion, I am a crotchety old grump and YABU Grin

Inkpaperstars · 15/04/2020 11:40

YANBU, they definitely should thank you.

Anon3742577 · 15/04/2020 11:41

I walk into the road for other pedestrians all the time. It's rare that anyone says thanks..

TBF, I think as a runner you should be the one going out into the road. Your breath will be affecting a larger area due to heavier breathing, plus you're moving faster so easier for you to get out of the way Smile

PersonaNonGarter · 15/04/2020 11:42

Oh FGS.

You’re doing what you should! Yes, it’s nice if they thank you, but they don’t need to. Presumably you aren’t putting yourself in actual danger? Stop if you are.

MrMeeseekscando · 15/04/2020 11:44

It depends really.
3 of us plus a dog all moved into the road so a runner didn't have to break stride, he blanked us and ran into a house before we passed by each other.
We decided it was because he looked like he was about to pass out. Rude though.

Doingtheboxerbeat · 15/04/2020 11:45

Runners are the new cyclists at the minute, so welcome to being hated /ignored or blamed for everything from bad weather to pandemic causing. Enjoy.

Original poster
Fizzysours · 15/04/2020 11:45

Well somebody has to move. So it is 50/50 if I should or they should. So...nice to say thanks, no? FGS? Not really difficult is it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fizzysours · 15/04/2020 11:46

That was relpy to @PersonaNonGarter

OP posts:
clareOclareO · 15/04/2020 11:46

YABU. You should be giving plenty of space!

Porcupineinwaiting · 15/04/2020 11:48

You want to be thanked for not barging past people and breathing all over them? Ok. Hmm

GrumpyHoonMain · 15/04/2020 11:49

You should be moving well out of the way of pedestrians as you as you can - you have no idea if any pedestrians you encounter have the ability to dodge you.

somewheresorted · 15/04/2020 11:50

Go out running when it’s dark - it’s honestly so much easier and less stressful!

onanothertrain · 15/04/2020 11:50

I agree OP and as a runner and pedestrian I thank anyone that moves to let me pass. Although currently on here runners are the new MIL so get your hard hat on

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 15/04/2020 11:51

I got a sarcastic 'you're welcome!' from a mum out cycling with her family the other day when we cycled past. They'd stopped to let us past, I could see her and her husband but not her sons who were waiting round the corner, so I had assumed that the parents were waiting for the children (we had passed them earlier so I knew the children were missing if that makes sense). Anyway I'd said thanks to every other bloody person that stepped out the way, we tried to go in the road where we could (daughter is 4 and cars round here have been a lot faster since roads are quieter) or cycle on grass verges etc to keep out their way, and I am constantly reminding my daughter to stay in single file and give people plenty of space while ensuring shes not cutting me up etc. It pissed me off a hit to be honest, yes I was impolite but it's not her job to police my manners like I'm a child.
People arent always rude when they don't say thanks, they might be a million miles away, or having a horrific day, or might think you are fine running in the road (which I've seen runners round here do on quieter roads).

LisaSimpsonsbff · 15/04/2020 11:53

I agree that it's just nicer if people can be polite, but I've sometimes found myself instinctively not acknowledging people when I'm distancing from them - in the supermarket yesterday I suddenly realised I was avoiding eye contact with people as I was leaving the 2m space. Once I noticed I stopped doing it - there's no reason not to be friendly even from a distance! - but it feels quite natural to ignore someone you're physically distancing yourself from - it's quite unusual in 'normal' life that you'd physically move away from someone but want to engage with them. I've noticed lots of other people doing the same so it's not just me!

Original poster
Fizzysours · 15/04/2020 11:54

I would never verbally attack somebody for not thanking me. Agree people may be fielding a toddler / upset / stressed. But not three quarters of people every day? And previous poster...what part of my posts suggest I would ever barge into anyone? Lol

OP posts:
PersonaNonGarter · 15/04/2020 11:55

Well, if you think you are so entitled to thanks, why not just assume it?

Your behaviour and decisions are for you. You cannot control others, especially not into interacting with or praising you. Which is what this is about.

IDontLikeMondays88 · 15/04/2020 11:56

You could also just slow down or stop. Think that’s what the official protocol is. But most runners do not want to slow down at all is my experience.

If it’s any consolation I am heavily pregnant and yet my husband and I spend all our time crossing roads and getting out of the way of others while on our walk.

Original poster
Fizzysours · 15/04/2020 11:57

I am enjoying the idea that runners annoy people. How irritating that those that are able to, are keeping their fitness up!! Of course, we're less likely to use healthcare resources... just sayin....

OP posts:
Pinkblueberry · 15/04/2020 11:57

I do this all the time for pedestrians and I couldn’t give a shit quite frankly. I’m busy running. I’m busy looking to see if there’s cars in the road, then I look down at the road and the curb so I’m not tripping over, get back on the pavement and then I’m gone. I don’t tend to have time to make eye contact and look around to check if people are saying thank you... Most runners I see don’t make much eye contact, their pretty focused facing forward. Sounds like you weren’t really running before this lockdown?

ch3rrycola · 15/04/2020 12:01

I wouldn't care if you ran past me, so doubt I'd say thanks, assume you were moving to avoid me. I've had people walk away to avoid me walking past them, I also don't thank them.