I feel so defeated today. Aibu to ask whats made you feel done today?

[cultkid]

I feel down because my three year old is genuinely the most exhausting child. He is so defiant. Everything is no. Every thing I ask him to do he won't. He's been constant today and I have a fever of 39 for the 4th day I am tired.
I'm worried about money and how to float ourselves through this Covid Hell.
I am worried about when I can see my parents next.
My back hurts. I really have lost my motivation today and feel sad and scared.
Whats Been making you feel defeated today? I can't be the only one.

Feeling down as my company furloughed me today...kinda knew it was coming but hoped they'd see I'm better at the job than my colleague.

Do you have anyone that can help you out that has also been isolating?

Are you taking something for your temperature? if it continues/anyway ring the doctors and speak to them.

Raising children is challenging, don't be tough on yourself. If you can, once child asleep take a relaxing bath/shower, listen to some music and forget the housework, take the pressure off yourself.

In the day use the tv whilst you feel down, you don't have to be super-mum, look after yourself too. Sending best wishes.

OP I'm so glad you started this thread, I've been so down today. Struggling with me and DH working from home while looking after an extremely hyperactive toddler who has suddenly decided not to nap and also throws whatever I make for breakfast/lunch/dinner on the floor. I have anxiety which I generally manage ok but today it was just too much and I'm physically and mentally exhausted. Also broke my diet but too fed up to feel guilty! Big hugs to everyone out there, it's ok to have off days

he acts like a twatty knob head with a knob face and a stupid knob

I recognise this feeling today.

yesterday was my dark day. my 6yo just spends all day telling me how I'm a stupid idiot, I hate you, go away, aggressive with her 2yo sister to the extent 2yo is having nightmares, and almost in the same breath all lovey and needy.

I lost it and yelled and slammed doors and took to my bed sobbing with little dd finding me, "you sad mummy, mummy huggy".

luckily today is another day and despite the same from dd1 I've been really Zen and generally worried about her rather than angry.

My dad died last month. I was with him when he suddenly collapsed; his heart had just stopped. I had to give him CPR, I broke his ribs, and I just can't get his dying moments out of my head.

I can't visit my widowed mum, she's all alone.

Every day I feel myself slipping further and further into depression. I miss him so much, it's like a a raw wound in my belly that won't heal.

I just want to go for a long walk through the fields. I want to spend time with my mum.

Part of me is scared of life returning to 'normal' because it never will be again for me. I'm just going to keep losing loved ones until it's my turn to die. That's what life is.

Bad day today.

I am so, so sorry for your loss, @SlowDecline. There are no words.

Did it all today, kids, meals, housework while DP worked in the home office. Fine. Until DP surfaced late afternoon for a cuppa and ranted about the ‘state’ of the kitchen ( clean, a few bits sitting that we’d just used) and how I’d managed to not load the dishwasher ‘properly’ again. Cue crashing of dishes being re-arranged while shouting .
Felt like crying. DP then buggered off again for another 4 hours.

F

Pica, that is horrible of your dh. Dh occasionally does similar about dw, not kitchen though, and I always call him out on it. It is unacceptable. What is about stressed people getting so irate about dw stacking. My mum does this too. They are insane. Best wishes, but dont let him get away with this micromanaging and interfering.

I've had the millionth argument with my 5 year old about being on his tablet or watching TV, where he hits and screams.
He's still bloody awake now after nearly 1.5 hrs of bed time.
My H, soon to be ex, is downstairs ignoring us... Told him last week I felt it was over, he agreed this week, but it's now just dawning on me, how much is going to change and I'm scared, sad but also optimistic a bit. Right now mostly scared.
It's my DDs 10 th birthday tomorrow and she was meant yo get tickets to matilda with me, not happening now. I'm sad for her and my ds that this year they'll remember as when their lives changed, on top of all this.
Just tired, missing seeing my friends, missing my job, drives to the seaside, my family.. Just want to hug people, anyone!

Big hugs to you all - things will get better soon x

My dog has literally had me screaming today. He's been a wee shite, with the shits! My home is covered in puppy poo pads, coz he keeps having accidents. The little twat got into my bedroom though, and the inevitable happened. . It's his own fault though for snaffling a huge cream meringue I was going to have with my coffee!!! (Vet has been consulted)

I may have to have my 15 year old cat put to sleep tomorrow. I've been trying to hold it together today for my DC (9 & 11) but couldn't. I just hope they understand and don't hate me for it.

I think I've had covid. Have been ill for 13 days now, struggling to breathe, chest pain, high temp. Honestly thought I was going to die, but I was too scared to call for help.

Anyway, started to feel a bit better today! Yay! This evening, started getting a sore throat, so now I think I'm getting a cold 😢 I just feel like, it's not fair. I want to be well, I want to bake, and clean, and garden, and play with my kids. I've been stuck in bed for over a week now.

Big hugs to everyone

I’m glad I read this thread, it gave me a little perspective. I have a DD (2) a new born and a SS who is now with us full time until things start to improve. I cried today because my newborn won’t do anything other than scream or feed and the guilt of seeing my DDs face when I snapped that I couldn’t play with her yet again because I was busy broke my heart. I’ve been struggling to deal with all three kids and attempting to keep the house in an acceptable state while my DH works. This thread showed me that there are plenty of other people struggling just ask much as me and more and still surviving. Makes me feel like I’m not alone.

I don’t hate teachers
I don’t know anyone that does

I’m sorry you feel bashed and low
And I don’t understand why

It’s not me and not anyone I know

I'm so glad I found this thread. "Defeated" 100% describes how I'm feeling this morning.

DH and I both working from home full time, while looking after a toddler (who doesn't bloody sleep) and trying to home-school older DC is proving stressful and exhausting. We're having to work in shifts from 7am- 10pm or later to fulfill our contracted hours, so although we're locked down in the same house we hardly get any time together and I miss him. When we are together we're irritable and snappy with one another due to being so tired and stressed out. My 6yo cannot get her head around the fact that I'm home all the time but not available to her, especially as she knows it's the Easter Holidays and I normally work term time only. Yesterday she said to me "I feel lonely because you're always working" and I felt like the worst Mother who ever lived. Then my work phone rang and I had to walk away from her to deal with yet another urgent safeguarding concern. Then I read threads on here about how school staff aren't doing enough, we don't know we're born compared to private sector workers, why should we have the summer off when we've been sat at home doing fuck all for weeks now etc. etc. and I just feel like jacking it all in to be honest.

Some days it feels like nothing you do will ever be good enough for anyone.

@tootiredtoconga

I agree. I'm seriously considering not returning to teaching after this is over. I can't take the hatred and vitriol anymore.

Hey all of you,
I hope today is better 💔
I still have a really really sore throat
I have called the GP
I was on hold for over 40 mins and number 19 in the call
Someone is going to call me
I think I have a throat infection

My husband is really grumpy today he's moaning about sex and feeling neglected
The baby is bored
But my three year old is In a better mood
I am going to do something nice with him when the baby goes to sleep

Sending all the love to everyone

The thread made me feel so much less lonely last night. The power of mumsnet 💓

@cultkid

Hope that today is a better day for all of us!

cultkid he needs to understand there is nothing less attractive than a man whingeing about not getting sex. Especially when you're feeling poorly! I hope you get through to the GP soon

@cultkid Hopefully you can get a quick diagnosis, some super strong antibiotics and get well soon. In the meantime lots of ice cream (it’s medicinal!)!

Today I am going to hide any school threads, put my marking on hold and concentrate on MY children today. We are still in our pjs and watching ‘Ralph Breaks the Internet’.

Sending positive thoughts to everyone on this thread - I really needed it yesterday!

Serving in the supermarket, watching a woman (totally unthinking) lick her fingers before she riffled through the money in her purse and handed me a tenner.

I was wearing gloves and I could have refused to take the money of course, but I was thinking about her. She Didn't. Even. Think.

She'd been round the shop, touching all the products, touching her basket...and she licked her fingers.

Add me to the list.

I've just started a new role in a completely unfamiliar department. I feel sick every night and morning as I feel so horrendously out of my depth. My line manager is conspicusouly absent.

I have to present a bit of work at 4 pm which I haven't even started (not been able to book time with the people I need to consult with). The team I'm presenting to are notorious for being bastards and ripping people to shreds. I'm just over it now.

I found texts to 3 different women in DP's phone the day before lockdown. I will be booting him out as soon as this is over. In the meantime, we're having nice conversations, cooking together, enjoying walks etc. It is the biggest mindfuck ever.