Furious at my DH

[NotTheVeryNice]

DCs and I self isolating, but DH is a key worker so goes to work every day. I expect him to self isolate while not working, but he does not. He goes to see family members 2-3 times a week 'just for a chat'. Family members are all in their 30s, no children. Yesterday he has informed me that family has invited us for BBQ on Sunday and DH expected us to go. I am fuming! Yesterday he went to see his friend, who is single and who's uncle died from corona, and see nothing wrong with it, as 'friend has been self isolating for weeks (friend is a worrier even in better times) and I wear PPE at work so it's fine'. I can not imagine how to get in to his head that we have to have as less contact as possible. He is a covidiot, and should I just leave him to it? If I had second home to go to, I would leave him- that's how annoyed I am. Sorry, just wanted to vent and I can's sleep.

PositiveVibez well said!

fagashJackie you might not have meant that you would rather see all loved ones and risk getting ill but that's what your original post implies. So who's the numpty?

I wondered who the idiots were who think the rules don't apply to them.

What is he thinking? What a selfish fool.

Plus he ‘expects’ you to go to the bbq. Apart from the outrageous disregard for safety, who expects other adults to do as they’re told? Is he God?

2countbackfromten
I hope you get well soon.

Well, we have a Communities Secretary who has stood on podium at the 5pm Press Brief and urged us to Stay Home, Protect the NHS and Save Lives. He has been found to have visited his parents in Shropshire to take them some groceries. The man, Robert Jenrick, has demonstrated the “it doesn’t apply to me/I’m different” attitude that will see BBQ’s/parties/picnics happening up and down the UK, this weekend.

How are people to get the message above when those in Govt. don’t get it?

Your DH is a fucking idiot.

I'm continually flabbergasted that people like your husband think this is ok. The rules apply to everyone. I'd tell him to go live with his wider family for the lockdown and he can see you and the children after restrictions have been lifted. And I'd report the bbq.

The more people are being exposed to who may have the virus, even mildly, possibly the worse it is because of viral load.This is one explanation for why some healthy medical staff have got it so badly. So his coming back from visiting lots of different people is a real problem.

Countdown, hope you're better soon. Take all the advice you would have given to your patients, I know doctors are notorious for not following their own advice.

I’ve had an argument just this week with my DH. His sister has been bugging him to go fix a light for his dad. He arranged to go this weekend. I went off it when he got off the phone. He’s no longer going! Had he gone, he wouldn’t have been coming back here.

His sister is an arse hole. She takes shopping. Goes in for a cuppa etc etc! I can’t work out if she’s just absolutely stupid, or one of these thick people who think it won’t happen to them!

Your husband is a dick. He wouldn’t be living with me anymore.

much fury on this site. Where do you find the energy for it?

Oh I don't know it kind of arises all by itself when I watch people die without their loved ones at work and then worry about my asthmatic DH dying to... and then read about selfish idiots who don't follow rules and therefore risk lives.

God Laguna, you looking for a gold medal in witless sanctimony? Yes, my dear, you have won. Won for nothing.

@midsomer people are allowed to feel emotions beyond bland pleasantness.

You may have the emotional range of a teapot, it doesn't mean we all do.

I'd tell him to stay with his parents until this is all over. He's breaking the rules and putting your life at additional risk with his behaviour, as well as others'.

What an arse.

@FagashJackie

Are you for real?

Your DH is a stupid arse. If it was my DH I would be changing the locks next time he went out unnecessarily, it’s the only way to keep yourself safe.

@EverythingChanges321

It was co-authored by researchers from Guy’s and St. Thomas NHS Foundation Trust, as it clearly states in the article I linked.

I’m sure the NHS and KCL would really be encouraging people to take something that could make them worse at this time, especially something that is out of patent

If my husband did this (he wouldn't, he volunteered to shield with me for 12 weeks) he would not get back in the house ever. If he tried, i would call the police, tell them what he'd been doing and have him removed. He's endangering yours and your children's lives. That is not someone I could love and respect.

I've come to the conclusion this has brought out the stupid and selfish in a lot of people.

If I was the op I'd be telling my dh to get alternative accommodation from now onwards

And as for the poster who said I'd rather run the risk of getting ill than be separated you may find you get permanently separated by death if you carry in the way you are:

There is a serious amount of stupid around.

Well, we have a Communities Secretary who has stood on podium at the 5pm Press Brief and urged us to Stay Home, Protect the NHS and Save Lives. He has been found to have visited his parents in Shropshire to take them some groceries. The man, Robert Jenrick, has demonstrated the “it doesn’t apply to me/I’m different” attitude that will see BBQ’s/parties/picnics happening up and down the UK, this weekend.

He also apparently took them medication. That's allowed. And we don't know if there was any other way of getting it to them as we have no more information.

I don’t know anyone who would think this is ok, let alone any key workers!

If my partner was putting me and children at risk like that I'm not sure I could view him in the same way in future. Sorry no suggestions on what to do. Sorry he's so selfish.

as he goes visiting private homes, including, vulnerable people's.

So it's not just the OP's family he's putting at risk. Idiot.

Thank you all so much for the kind words and best wishes. I should be preparing for a night shift right now in intensive care but instead feeling guilty and very drained by this virus already. Hopefully will just be mild.

I just want people to stay safe. I cannot tell you how heartbreaking it is to think my face covered in my mask might be the last thing someone sees when we need to sedate and intubate them because of covid. Or how we have to ring family members to deliver the worst news. This has been the hardest time of my career and I just want people to stay safe so they don’t have to experience any of that horror.

And can I thank every single person staying at home and following the rules of social distancing - you are helping us to save lives

I'm co sorry, @countbackfromten I hope you make a good recovery. It's such a nasty virus and I really feel for all the medical staff doing all they can to help their patients who are suffering from it, and who are fearing catching it themselves.