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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No birthday cards

71 replies

Curious78 · 09/04/2020 10:03

It's my DD's 4th birthday and I'm feeling down about the severe lack of cards. People, my own family included, have seemingly used the current situation as an excuse not to be able to send one. (My address is known). Is it ok to be upset about this or do I need to shut the hell up and consider the posties who could all be poorly? Feeling unloved.

OP posts:
NoMorePoliticsPlease · 09/04/2020 10:08

Your 4 year old will not be upset if you celebrate the birthday. It is you that feel slighted. I have noticed an increasing push in our society, I believe largely from card manufactures. It is a cynical ploy. UK and US . There isnt this frenzy of card giving in Europe. A birthday can be whatever you want it to be and your child will be thrilled its a special day. I do think after this many people will step back from many of the expectations that I have seen cause pressure and resentment in th elast few years. Its a bit like weddings, the monster grows and if you dont do ABC your are being short changed. Maybe its about you and your family together making this a special day

Applejaxx · 09/04/2020 10:10

YABU. We are not living in normal times, they may have forgotten because they have more important matters on their minds or they may not have been able to get out and get a card. Also the post is weird
at the moment, we are getting it every other day, sometimes late afternoon.

I doubt a four year old will care that to be honest.

TeenPlusTwenties · 09/04/2020 10:11

People won't be making trips out to buy cards.
They may not think to get one from the supermarket (if sold there at all) as part of a weekly large shop.
Plus, post is getting delayed, we have sometimes had nothing for 2 days and then a great bundle on the third.

Pippa12 · 09/04/2020 10:13

It’s my child’s birthday in the next couple of weeks. I’ve decided to let it pass and celebrate with friends and family in the summer when he can have the party and attention he deserves. I figured everybody has the weight of the world on their shoulders, I don’t want anybody risking their health/spending money they don’t have when we can celebrate in the future.

Paintedmaypole · 09/04/2020 10:13

YANBU unless someone is working on the frontline or has illness in the immediate family you would think that they would make more effort to cheer other people up, not less,

delilabell · 09/04/2020 10:13

I'm struggling to buy cards. Moonpig and funky pigeon aren't accepting online either. It could be because of this?

Etcni · 09/04/2020 10:14

Perhaps your family don't want to have to go out on an additional trip or trips to get the card and stamps, then be touching the card and envelope, then out to post it, after which it may come into contact with several more people before reaching you. But if they're going out and about fairly frequently and it does just seem to be an excuse, YANB that U to be put out, though it does seem from your post that it's more you who's upset than your child.

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/04/2020 10:15

Happy birthday to your DD. It’s fine to be disappointed. We’ve had a few friends birthdays since the lockdown and I haven’t missed one, I have a drawer of cards and the postbox in on my daily walk. The harder things are the more important it is to celebrate where you can.

What nice plans do you have for her today?

peekaboob · 09/04/2020 10:15

I'm with you OP. Moonpig and the like are still operating.

dramaqueenforlife · 09/04/2020 10:16

A bit unfair. Buying and posting a card involves going out making what I deem unnecessary in this current climate. Queuing up possibly to get stamps. And I know the online card companies cannot cope and most have suspended online card ordering temporarily.

Billyeyelash · 09/04/2020 10:16

There's no where near us to buy cards except supermarkets (I guess they are selling)

So it's a make own cards if you've stuff in and stamps.

I feel days are driftng and people are forgetting the date. Lucky if we can recall the day.

Hope you can make it a celebration.

lidoshuffle · 09/04/2020 10:16

Thousands of people are dying and we are told to minimise our shopping trips. You need to get get some perspective of a birthday card over potentially a life.

Bunnybigears · 09/04/2020 10:18

It's my sons 13th birthday today, there has been a few less cards than normal but I know some people have sent cards but with the post being odd they havent arrived yet. A few people have also text him happy birthday instead of a card I wouldnt let it upset you, you have your health and a full day to play and be happy with your daughter.

inwood · 09/04/2020 10:18

Moonpig isn't operating anymore @peekaboob

Applejaxx · 09/04/2020 10:22

Moonpig isn’t operating at the moment.

SmallPinkBear · 09/04/2020 10:23

I tried to send a card to a friend’s daughter and couldn’t find anyone online (moonpig etc) who was accepting orders...

TiredofSM · 09/04/2020 10:25

@peekaboob I think you’ve got that wrong.
To be honest OP you sound incredibly selfish and spoilt.
I’m getting my shopping from online deliveries as we are having to isolate.
Will I be making a special trip out to post a card for your kid? No way. My life is more important. Sorry about that.

Original poster
Curious78 · 09/04/2020 10:25

Thank you so much for the positive comments of unreasonableness, I had braced myself for a barrage of abuse Grin

It didn't occur to me that Moonpig etc may well have downed tools, I take it all back!

We will be celebrating the day with a little gathering of friends over lunch online and a stroll afterwards. She's really happy tossing her balloons at the minute - like a few have said it's only me that's affected by the whole thing, she's loving it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Curious78 · 09/04/2020 10:26

I spoke too soon !! Thanks @peekaboob your judge of character is terrible x

OP posts:
myBumJuiceSmellsLikeRoses · 09/04/2020 10:28

I tried to order from Funky Pigeon with no luck, the day after I placed an order on Moonpig then they stopped taking new orders too.

The card shops are closed and supermarkets are concentrating on restocking essential food items.

Yes it's poop for little ones but it affects all ages, it may just not be possible for people to buy cards now.
I had 4 birthdays to think of in April, luckily nothing in May. Hopefully by the June birthdays I can buy cards for my family again.

Making sure my nieces and nephews stay alive is more important than sending them a folded piece of paper.

Milicentbystander72 · 09/04/2020 10:29

Try Thortful for online cards. Really fantastic quality and very much still operating.

RuggerHug · 09/04/2020 10:29

Can you ask your relatives/friends to do a video call/message with her to say happy birthday instead? As long as she's getting the message that way I think she'll be ok with lack of cardsSmile

Original poster
Curious78 · 09/04/2020 10:31

Sorry @peekaboob my reply should have been aimed at @TiredofSM - you are a terrible judge of character. Bitchy too

OP posts:
Milicentbystander72 · 09/04/2020 10:31

It's my friends 50th next week and we had arranged a party. I've just managed to order her a 'Self Isolating' funny themed birthday card via Thorful. The only thing they could add on it's a chocolate gift as they've sold out.

user1493413286 · 09/04/2020 10:35

It’s mine and my DDs birthdays this month; I was going to suggest to people that they send her a little video or voice clip in place of a card which I think she’ll probably enjoy more than the card and still shows effort and recognition that it’s her birthday