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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

No birthday cards

71 replies

Curious78 · 09/04/2020 10:03

It's my DD's 4th birthday and I'm feeling down about the severe lack of cards. People, my own family included, have seemingly used the current situation as an excuse not to be able to send one. (My address is known). Is it ok to be upset about this or do I need to shut the hell up and consider the posties who could all be poorly? Feeling unloved.

OP posts:

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 09/04/2020 10:36

I’ve just ordered from Moonpig. A card and a present.

MereDintofPandiculation · 09/04/2020 10:37

Not only may people not be able to get cards, they may not wish to cause a parcel of contamination to be posted through your letter box. People are being advised to wash hands after dealing with post, many people are quarantining their post for 3 days. Why would you want to add to someone's problems by sending birthday cards?

EndlessUserName · 09/04/2020 10:38

Ignore the haters, you are allowed to be upset even if it is a bit undreasonable - you can't help how you feel!

TiredofSM · 09/04/2020 10:38

It’s your child’s birthday and you’re on MN moaning about how many cards they got? Nah, I think I’ve got it just right thanks.

Bbang · 09/04/2020 10:40

I’m with you, I picked up cards for every birthday through till end of August while I did my weekly shop last week, got some stamps too. I’m not bothering with gifts but I am sending cards, it’s my sons 1st birthday in about 6 weeks. Im hopeful he’ll get a few cards but I won’t be sad if he doesn’t.

Justgivemesomepeace · 09/04/2020 10:47

It was my birthday last week. I got a xmas card from my niece, a card from my sister that had no envelope and a brother card from Dd. She scribbled out the 'br' and changed it to an 'm'. It's hard at the moment. With things as they are I'd be happy with wishes via text or something. Just make a fuss of her and do your best to celebrate and have a lovely day. I hope your little girl has a lovely birthday.

gillybean2 · 09/04/2020 10:52

They could send an e-card such as Jacquie Lawson (sorry don’t know how to add a link)

MarthasGinYard · 09/04/2020 10:54

'my own family included, have seemingly used the current situation as an excuse not to be able to send one.'

Perhaps they genuinely couldn't get and send one.

PenguinsOnParade · 09/04/2020 10:58

I ordered from Funky Pigeon just a couple of days ago. I looked just now and they're restricting orders to certain items which they weren't doing when I ordered. I'd looked at Moonpig but they were taking a while to deliver according to a notice on their website.

A neighbour's DD had a birthday a few days ago and my DC drew cards on paper for her as we thought it would be a nice gesture when she can't go out for birthday treats or have anyone visiting and we didn't have any cards in the house to use.

PenguinsOnParade · 09/04/2020 11:00

Hit post too soon.

My DD's birthday was well before lockdown and the only cards she received were from us, her sister, and my DPs. I've noticed people don't send cards as much as they used to anymore.

Paintedmaypole · 09/04/2020 11:00

You can get stamps onlins. You can pay postage for larger items online, there are plenty of cards on ebay. There are ways round having to stay at home.

Applejaxx · 09/04/2020 11:01

I don’t think anyone has been bitchy OP. You do sound needy and entitled. Your child is still very young and probably won’t even realise she’s not had loads of cards.

I’m not sure why you are so upset to be honest? Be thankful that your healthy.

MigginsMs · 09/04/2020 11:03

YAB a bit U, my son is older and other than from us (I had the foresight to do a card factory run several weeks before all this kicked off) he only got 2 cards, one from a family member who I know will have had a stash and stamps in her house and one sent via moonpig. You can’t expect people to buy a card and go and buy stamps in the current time, if they remember when shopping for other stuff they could do I guess but so many people are also understandably just preoccupied. It’s different for adults but personally it’s my birthday next month and it will annoy me if people put themselves or others at risk to get me a card or gift.

Look forward to celebrating with her when it’s all over and hope she has the nicest day possible.

PenguinIce · 09/04/2020 11:10

I don’t think you are being unreasonable OP. Fair enough if people are still working then they can be forgiven for not have the time but most people have more time on there hands to be creative....you can order online and get a card delivered at card factory or if a person is worried about sending a contaminated card then they could record a birthday message over Skype or FaceTime. To just not bother is a bit crappy.

MinorArcana · 09/04/2020 11:10

I can understand being disappointed, but it’s genuinely more difficult than usual to buy and send cards. Particularly if someone is in a vulnerable group and avoiding the shops. Not everyone has a stash of cards at home already.

Also, I don’t know what the post is like where you are, but our Royal Mail deliveries have been a lot more sporadic than normal. Post isn’t arriving at the usual time of day if it does at all, and letters etc are taking longer to arrive. I’m assuming that’s down to a combination of more things being posted, and postal workers being ill or self isolating.

bruffin · 09/04/2020 11:15

I'm with you OP. Moonpig and the like are still operating.
No they are not, last week they were not taking new orders and i found some one else and they text me to say that i had to resend the order a few days later so card will be at least 5 days late.

goldpartyhat · 09/04/2020 11:23

YABU. A 4 year old isn't really bothered. People are no using a pandemic as an 'excuse'. It's a genuine reason to concentrate of home, family and jobs (or lack of them) and money. A birthday just isn't important in the grand scheme of things.

Fluffybutter · 09/04/2020 11:33

@Milicentbystander72 I always use Thortful so was glad they’re still operating .
Got a very funny card for my niece and my mum .
My dd’s 9th birthday on Wednesday and I’ve managed to find cards online via amazon or eBay so there is a way to send them if you really look.
I suppose it’s more the buying stamps that is the issue

Fluffybutter · 09/04/2020 11:34

@MinorArcana I think they are alternating , so one day they do letters ,then the next it’s parcels .
That’s what it is round here anyway.

Milicentbystander72 · 09/04/2020 11:37

Fluffybutter Thorful will post them for you. Job done x

Fluffybutter · 09/04/2020 11:47

Yeah sorry, I know that.
I meant people not sending them to the op. Not many people have heard of Thortful so I think after moonpig and funky pigeon it just leaves shops or like I said ,amazon but then you still have to send those ones yourself .
Didn’t find many good ones for kids on Thortful though but for adults there are hundreds

Lampan · 09/04/2020 11:55

My friend just had a baby and I would like to send her a card. But I checked and I don’t have any baby cards in my card stash, so she will have to do without. It’s certainly not worth making a special trip to the shop for one. Maybe if I happen to see a card next time I need groceries I might send one. But not otherwise. I’m sure she understands.

Playmistyforme66 · 09/04/2020 11:56

I always, always send cards and I want to but I haven’t over the past few weeks due to not being able to shop for cards or stamps and worried about posting my germs to people. I’ve made some cards where appropriate for members of my household.

The pandemic isn’t an excuse not to send a card as I love to send them but it’s not safe right now.

Playmistyforme66 · 09/04/2020 11:57

Moon pig etc are taking a long time to post out now, I missed the date for sending one out to a friend because it would take 7 days a lot longer than usual.

Fluffybutter · 09/04/2020 11:58

If anyone is a Vodafone customer then if you go on the Vodafone app then Veryme , they have a code to get a free card from Thortful, you just pay 70p postage

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