To ask. What age is most difficult to look after during lockdown?

[louise5754]

Those with primary age children I think it's will be hard to remember back to having babies and we haven't had the teen years yet to compare.

But.....

I reckon the most difficult age to keep entertained would be the toddlers 1.5-3 ish?!

Anyone else?

Mine are 8 nearly 9, 12 and 14 nearly 15 and pretty easy aside from the youngest's school work.

We're abroad and had 3 weeks of term time school closure but today is the first day of our holiday lockdown. School children here are expected to get through a serious amount (6 scheduled lessons of 50 minutes each plus an hour's homework daily, sent by email no online lessons) of full on very much compulsory set school work and have been told in no uncertain terms that nothing will be repeated and parents who don't ensure their children complete the set work will be disadvantaging their children. This has unapologetically included new content.

That has been hardest with the 8 year old by several miles.

They're all getting on fine though, pretty much no arguing. We're lucky to have a reasonably big (4 bedroom semi) house and a small garden and to be a few meters from a massive forest where we see maybe 3 or 4 people if we spend a couple of hours there. They're fairly young for their ages in some ways and have been lovely company.

I've also been working healthcare shifts so get to leave the house without them which helps.

The teens socialise online in their allocated screen time (DD watches films online with her friends and chats during them, ds1 games online and uses discord to chat) they've really adapted well. Dc1 misses school but dc2 isn't bothered.

If I wasn't utterly failing to do my own college work it'd all be fine tbh. That's stressing me out. I can't do it though, partly due to constant interruptions and dc3 needing my focus with his school work and party due to being tired from work and the kids being clingier than normal and emotionally blackmailing me a bit for going to work, so I feel they need me when I'm home...

@CarrieErbag Been there. It’s not easy and this must be a major spanner in the works.

i have a 3yo and 3 month old. we aren't suffering too badly (very fortunate with our outdoor space particularly), but standards are low and my 3yo is being left to his own devices more than he should be probably

I feel so much better after reading this thread.....mainly that my feelings of dispair are completely justified.

2.5 yr old twins.

Toddlers suck. Never been so happy to still have to go to work in the evenings....then DP spikes a temp so Im stuck with them now 😩

Toddler, ten and teen. Toddlers need to run around so I’m so grateful to have a garden where I can say run!

Teen misses seeing his friends but can at least chat every day

Ten year old wants me a lot but also plays very well with toddler

I’ve no other children but wfh with my 2 year old is carnage. He won’t play by himself for more than 5 mins, if that. And, being a curious wee guy, if I’m using a laptop or on a work call obviously he wants in on that.

My daughter is turning 9 next month and has been so easy. I'm going through menopause though and I'm having terrible anxiety issues about everything, can't concentrate and feel like a terrible mum.

My 7 year old is OK - she enjoys quiet activities like reading and playing on the computer. 4 year old is a nightmare, he needs lots of interaction and both parents are also trying to work. 7 year old actually helps keep the 4 year old entertained. We have a tiny garden, our daily walks are our only lifeline at the moment.

2 year olds! God I love him but he is driving me insane!

Toddler plus 4 year old isn't a fun combination. Toddler is basically at the end of being containable in a playpen and there's lots of jealousy for attention.

Can't plonk a screen in front of 18 mo to give 4yo attention because any screen just grabs her attention and 18mo is a whirlwind of destruction if he gets the chance!

Definitely must be the toddler phase!! Remember those years, it’s so hard to contain them

I have a nearly 3 year old and a 12 week old

I am really struggling, the nearly 3 year old doesn't understand what is going on or why we can't see people or go out or why she can't go to pre-school at the moment. It's bloody horrible and I want things to hurry up and go back to normality

Mine are 6, 4 and 15 months.
6 and 4 year olds... fine.
15 month old on his own... fine.
All three together... hell. Trying to keep the older two amused (and educated) with a destructive toddler around is impossible.

My 2 year old is finding it difficult as you cannot explain why they cant go to their grandparents, park etc.

I’m finding the spread of ages the tough thing. 4 children, 9.5 years down to 6 months, including a toddler. Thank goodness we have a garden!

Finding lockdown with a 2-year-old pretty gruelling! DD2 is old enough to understand that something’s different, but not old enough to grasp the reasons why her nursery and classes are closed and she can’t see family members. She’s quite perceptive and has definitely been unsettled over the past couple of weeks - E.g. she’s unnerved by seeing people wearing masks and has commented ‘lots of people feeling sad’ when we’ve been out for our daily walk.

In many ways we’re luckier than most; I’m currently a SAHM, I’m a former teacher so ideas for activities are too problematic, DP is working from home but around to pick up some of the slack at times and our house is small but comfortable and we have a small garden. But it’s still pretty hard going having to come up with a continuous timetable of activities in 20min chunks from 7am to 8pm, with none of the outside distractions or down time we’d usually have. She doesn’t really nap any more, so once she’s up it’s pretty relentless. And tech solutions really don’t cut it for this age group - toddlers can’t learn through screens in the same way that older kids can.

I’m relieved that she’s not missing any formal schooling, but having studied child development and worked in early years for a while I’m concerned about the implications of lockdown on social and communication skills - so much learning at this age is through experience and everyday social interaction, and this cohort of toddlers obviously aren’t getting much of that at the moment. I can see this becoming an issue when these children start school in a few years’ time.

I am very relieved I have to say that mine are 10 and 8 - we are in a bit of a golden period, they are both reasonably independent, reasonably reasonable, can entertain themselves a bit, can play together most of the time. Eldest is not yet hormonal but youngest is well out of infancy and its demands and emotional storms.

Teenagers. At least it’s easy to keep the little ones in the house! I keep seeing groups of teenagers walking past.

Oh Lola, that’s tough. I was coming on here to say that I thought your combo would be the hardest. I have a 9 week old (also bf) and four year old pre-schooler. It’s tough, as the four year old is very active and missing everything but at least sort of understands why and can entertain himself a bit. Solidarity and hope it gets easier for you .

DS1 is 3.5 and DS2 10 months, I'm on mat leave. Both would be fine on their own but I'm finding the relentless attempt to meet both their needs so so hard. Prior to lockdown, DS1 was going to nursery 3 days a week which worked well. Now he's watching far too much TV while I settle DS2 for naps, cook/clean up dinner. He's done remarkably well with only being able to go in our garden (we were in isolation for almost 3 weeks) though our sofas have turned into climbing frames.

I'm back to work as a doctor on Wednesday and while I fully expect it to be crazy, I'm looking forward to having some headspace of my own without somebody whining at me!

Toddlers must be the worst...it's that hideous age where you can't leave them alone in room as they need constant supervision. Must be relentless. Mine are 9 & 12...at least I can hide from them occasionally!

Feel lucky mine 11 and 13. Toddlers would be tough

I have a severely autistic 14 year old. All the things that he has enjoyed for years and that kept him calm he cannot do. He is spending his days stimming, hurting himself or hurting us because he doesn't understand why things have changed and isn't coping.

I've got a 2.5 year old daughter and a 18 week old son. I'm absolutely demented just now.

All I'm getting from my daughter is constant backchat, tantrums, fridge raiding, the haunting sound of those music books in which the battery is dying and just sounds demonically possessed with the added brucie bonus of her obsession with pooing in her potty every time she goes for a pee.

My son is just a clingy koala bear who is teething and either wants a cuddle or the boob.

If you have to work from home without childcare obviously older babies and toddlers must be the hardest. In the UK nobody with a very small baby would be working, and small babies obviously either are impossible to put down/ colicky or reflux/ teething/ velcro / only sleep on a parent/ constantly feeding or are completely the opposite way and sleep a lot so can't be generalised about...

However I don't think its universally true that very young children are hardest if you aren't having to do paid work or study without childcare. Then it just depends on all the other factors...

I agree living in a small flat without outdoor space and trying to work from home with multiple under 5s would be hardest... Impossible, in fact.