To ask. What age is most difficult to look after during lockdown?

[louise5754]

Those with primary age children I think it's will be hard to remember back to having babies and we haven't had the teen years yet to compare.

But.....

I reckon the most difficult age to keep entertained would be the toddlers 1.5-3 ish?!

Anyone else?

Dd is 20 months and ds is 9. Finding it really hard to entertain them both simultaneously. If it were just one or the other I don’t think it would be too bad. Dd gets bored and needs a new activity every half hour if that. Ds is very bored and disruptive as he is usually out on his bike 24/7. So sick of hearing ‘what can I do????!!’ ‘What can I eat???!’ Have a bloody orange and get one of your million things out of your bedroom

We have a just-turned-four-year-old and a almost-two-year-old.

The 4 year old is going a bit stir crazy being cooped up indoors for most of the day and is asking a lot of questions about why he can't see his friends and go to the park, but at least he can be kept quiet for an hour or so with the iPad or Paw Patrol on loop.

The 1 year old is obviously too young to really notice what is going on, but is currently teething and being very clingy, which is tough when I'm meant to be WFH.

Together they are a nightmare. They can't seem to play nicely in the same room, either together or alongside each other. Within two minutes they are either fighting over the one toy that they absolutely must have that very second or beating the shit out of each other.

I think my kids are the easiest ages for this situation; 13, 11 & 8. They don’t really miss their mates and are used to school holidays being at home with me (I work in a school).

At one point I had 3 children under 5 and that was hard work, so I guess my pay off is now. Apart from a bit of bickering and needing prodding to get dressed/do school work they’re all pretty self-sufficient (I still have to feed them!).

I was always very mindful of not having to constantly entertain them/play with them as young children (I was more of a ‘buy the thing or take you to a soft play or facilitate a play date and off you go whilst Mommy drinks coffee with her friends, which is having benefits now, whilst I’ve been poorly with what I think is Coronavirus for the last two weeks).

DDs are 6 and 8 and incredibly easy.

More so when we had the structure of 'school' (no daily learning in the 'Easter holiday').

The things that make sibling rivalry worse...
Same gender (check)
Close in age (check)
One or more higher intelligence (check)

have actually worked out well, DH and I were saying we're incredibly impressed with how well they've been getting on.

A garden, fields and woodland behind our house and being able to FaceTime their friends has definitely helped.

I think late primary / teens who want to be out with their friends would be hard.

Toddler without a garden would be hard.

A child without siblings would be hard.

I don't think I would want more than 2 either!

Something like this really highlights how some parents struggle to engage their children and rely too much on things like soft play centres and toddler groups etc.

When my DD was young she wanted me to play with her, all day and mostly I did (the house looked like an absolute tip for years) even pretending to be a baby rabbit or grumpy bear or whatever role she made up for me that day for what seemed like hours on end I did lots of craft (I did craft at the toddler group for years after she left) as I am quite creative, and baking, games etc... but for my own sanity we had to go out most days. I hated soft play as I always thought it was a bit of a germ fest, and we didnt have the budget to do lots of classes, so mainly for walks, the library, one toddler group or I put her in a council run creche for an hour while I went to the gym. I had PND after my 2nd DC and realised I had to let DD entertain herself to a certain degree, for my own well being. I would have found it incredibly difficult to be in with 2 toddlers.
There must be very few people that occupy and entertain their very young children 24/7 on a long term basis without ever wanting or needing any outside activity or influence be that the tv, a library or toddler group, a grandparent or other relative or just popping round to a friend.

Something like this really highlights how some parents struggle to engage their children and rely too much on things like soft play centres and toddler groups etc.

Imo what a lot if crap. Children are like adults, they have different personalities. Some children are happy to play pretend games for hours (and might your input), others will do some drawings/art and crafts fir the whole afternoon (which you need to organise). And some won’t. They just won’t do that for more than half an hour and then will NEED tu runaround.
I remember my two spending hours chasing each other on a ride on. Ds2 wasn’t even walking at the time . Going to a playgroup or a soft play wasn’t a cop out. It was an issue of safety. Nowadays my teenagers are the same. Ds1 does a 10k run almost everyday to be able to cope with being inside all day.

I also have a clingy 3 year old, he told me last night that it makes him sad when I go and doesn’t want me to ever go again. I’m a teaching assistant and a bank HCA. It breaks my heart that I make him sad x

I've got 15,9,6 and 5 at home and over all it's fine.
There is a bit of bickering but mainly they are just getting on with it. Obviously there is time yet!...
I would find 18months-2.5 years hard they just seem to be on a mission to kill them selves or at least do as much harm as possible that combined with usual 2 year old frustration would be very tricky.
This is one occasion where having a big family seems to be an advantage there is always someone to play with although part of it is definitely down to space. If I was in a very small house with no garden things would be much harder.

Something like this really highlights how some parents struggle to engage their children and rely too much on things like soft play centres and toddler groups etc.

And then you go on to say it was hard and you had depression... so you'd like parents to lock themselves up in isolation with their children and ruin their mental health is that it? I've been there and trips out were the only thing that kept me sane. I didn't "struggle" to engage my children because of a trip to the library/toddler group... there was still 10/11 looooong hours in the day to "engage" with them which was much easier to do when I was getting my own needs met. Different things work for different families but If I had never left the house my children would most certainly have suffered from having a very unhappy, stressed mother.

I only have one 8 year old DD and it has been quite hard going as she has no body to play with and is frequently bored and lonely. She is able to chat to a couple of friends on the phone and an online game that they play but it’s not the same as having someone there.

My sister has 2 kids 8 & 9 and even though there have been a few squabbles over the weeks her 2 will occupy each other for part of the day.

I also have a sister who is 16, she found it extremely hard the first 10 days or so as she is used to being out and about socialising with friends and seeing her boyfriend but she said after a while she has accepted this as the new normal and chats on SM to people now.

My 36 year old husband drove me mad the first few days... kept walking from one room to the other, looking out the window, sitting down for 2 minutes then back up to walking again.. he is a very social person and more of an extrovert than me but he grew up under Saddam Hussien and he said this kind of takes him back to a time where regular curfews were placed on his town and is stirring up some old feelings of that time if he has a job to do at home he is better so we have together made a list of things and he came pick one to do a day to focus his mind

Teenagers are the worst by far. I'm a childminder and could have a million babies/toddlers but my teen is a nightmare

I know it'll be hard for the under 8's but they'll cope and pretty much forget it. The teens are hard, they are socially motivated and without that they're bored and go through patches of trying to get on with things and then not seeing the point and hibernating. They've been through this cycle already and we're only 2.5 weeks in! I feel bad for my 18 year old, he had so many plans this summer, just starting to find his feet in an adult world but with no cares. I remember the summer I was 18, so much carefree fun.

I have a nearly 5 year old and a (extremely active/crazy wild) 2.5 year old, I was honestly terrified about this time but I'm actually enjoying it... (not the general situation of course but spending time with them)
We do have a garden so that have helps, but I'm actually finding it ok, I'm not doing loads of homeschooling with older one, just trying to not put pressure of doing much in particular.

I think hardest would have been baby and toddler for me, I found it so difficult and would go crazy if I wasn't out the house everyday.

2 year old dts and dd is 7- the quality of dd’s learning is so poor! I simply cannot effectively divide my time and attention between the three of them and everyone is getting a complete shit show!

I think my adult DC is finding it hardest. She's been used to being independent at university living with friends having a blast and had big plans for the summer etc.
However all my four are used to entertaining themselves. We spend a lot of time at home normally. We've got quite large age gaps so often days out haven't worked well in the past, so we've focused on doing things around home for the past few years. This is a bit like our average school holidays minus swimming a bit of soft play for the younger two and the odd big trip out.

I've got 3 DDs who are 14, 11 & 18mths... at the minute I would say the 18mth old is the hardest work to keep occupied. She is very used to going to various toddler groups & getting out and about most days. The 14 year old is definitely missing her social life a lot... she's normally either at Youth Club or ballet lessons after school most days & at the weekends is very social with her friends - going ice skating/shopping/sleepovers etc. She is spending lots of time on Zoom or Facetime with her friendship group. My 11 year old is a bit more of a homebody and loves spending hours colouring/doing jigsaw etc so she has been in her element. Having said that, she has been quite sad/worried about potentially missing her last term of Primary School. All age groups have their moments but for me, it is definitely keeping an active toddler busy that has been the hardest.

I think if the parent/s are having to also work from home, then it must be babies that are hardest, then after that I would say it's those with children in reception or Y1, as it's difficult to do your work as well as trying to educate them, as they need a lot of input into doing the school work that older children generally don't.

All of mine individually are fine, all of them together is hard!

The 1 year old is probably the hardest work for me because he needs constant supervision. But he does nap for an hour or so.

The teens are ok, struggling to focus on school work and far too much screen time but they’re happy enough.

It’s the 4 year old who is most missing out. We don’t have a garden. Usually that’s fine because she plays outside a lot at preschool and we are very close to the beach so play there a lot. Now she doesn’t have preschool and we can go for walks but not to hang out on the beach to play. I try to set up activities for her but the 1 year old just bulldozes his way through, I can’t just leave him so I can play with her. If I ask the teens to play with her they just put the tv on or hand her the tablet. She’s not getting enough attention or stimulation and is having far too much screen time. I worry about her development a bit.

Sorry if this message is in the wrong place but I am new to MN. I’m currently on mat leave with my 5 month old son and for the past 6 weeks my husband has also been home with us as he has been furloughed. I’m the last 2-3 weeks my son has gotten used to having at both at home and having a lot more attention as there are now two of us at home with him. Because of this he is now completely reliant on one of us keeping us amused constantly! Even if we are in the room with him he screams if we are not giving him attention. He used to amuse himself on his playmat inbetween outings, classes and me playing with him but now he just lays there and screams. I’m really worried that he’s developed separation anxiety and that if the lockdown continues much longer this will just get worse. Is anyone else experiencing this? I have tried letting him cry it out but he gets so worked up and I can’t bare to leave him in a state!

I have no problem with my 3 or 6 year old.

My 8 month old is driving me to despair however

I would say 3, my daughter turned has had her birthday in lockdown.

We both work and it’s hard juggling childcare and work. She wants constant attention, I have been following suggestions with how to keep her entertained however her concentration is limited she won’t do it if she doesn’t want to. I try phonics, counting and there’s time when I read her a story and she doesn’t want me to do it! She can be so bossy and talks back at times. But then you have one of those great days where she’s an angel and it’s so much easier...

I’m genuinely feeling like I’m failing and she’s getting left behind!

Heaven knows what she will be like when she is back at Nursery from September....

Is anyone else experiencing this?

I have a nearly 3 year old. And it hasn't been easy. My eldest is 7 and much better at keeping herself occupied. Definitely the toddler stage is the hardest for me but then I don't have teenagers yet lol

Dd7 is a dream DD but my 19 month old Dd is a nightmare who had also decided she no longer requires any form of nap during the day

3 years old and one 6 months. Miles apart in terms of needs. Hellish

I have a 2.5yo old out of childcare and a five month old. I want to weep