Neighbour keeps going in and out.

[Bee128]

Hi all, I get on quite well with my neighbour generally. When I spoke to him a week ago he said his work had shut down and was intending to stay in apart from food shopping - he also said he had enough food to live on for a while apart from top ups. Middle aged chap lives on his own.

Now I never thought I’d be this kind of neighbour who is observing when someone leaves and gets home again but he has been in and out for days. He parks his car up right outside half the day it isn’t there. I know he doesn’t have any family locally - we try and chat with him as much as possible so he isn’t lonely.

He does have friends nearby.

Aibu to find this really annoying? I haven’t been out at all in 2 weeks. Oh has been going to work but the neighbour told me that he had finished and it’s baffling why he’d need to go out so much!

It’s starting to really p**s me off to be honest. He is in and out all day!

Oh well you might as well shoot me. I went for TWO short walks on our deserted streets the other day as my sciatica was hurting. Probably because the curtain twitchers on this forum made me feel bad for going out in the first place and I hadn't been out for several days.

Likewise I couldn't give two shits if big John over the road takes his pooch out for, er, two shits.

Yet another curtain twitchy nosey git thread.

I hear ya, OP! I was FUMING the other day, my neighbour had a friend in his garden, and they were talking those motherfuckers, I was FURIOUS! Should I phone police? SWAT? Ghostbusters?

No. Seriously. Couldn't care less, actually.

To my defence, I wasn't snooping and curtain twitching, I went outside to hang my laundry to dry and saw them.

Stop looking? Just a thought.

Go out and do a garden job/window clean at time he goes out and just find out what he's doing! Let us know of course!

Maybe he has an allotment.

It is a bit hypocritical towards the OP though, given how past threads on neighbours have gone on here where an OP has said they saw their neighbour looking out their kitchen window at them a little bit suspiciously and the rushed responses were to ring 101 and inform them immediately, don’t allow yourself to be a subject to danger etc and now there is an actual real life global pandemic in place, the same posters (or maybe different ones) on the same site are saying “it’s totally fine” and “chill out” and “mind your own business”...

I’m not a curtain twitcher and I have absolutely no idea what my neighbours are doing.

I do think those mumsnetters who are going to lots of different shops for lots of different vulnerable people are not doing anyone a favour really. No one needs to be getting prescriptions or bread or milk every single day. It’s absolute madness. It puts everyone at increased risk.

She can't help noticing if his car is outside her kitchen window. I'm sure her life is fine.

You can say something without being bitchy or judgy or spiteful. If you don't agree with her, fine. Doesn't make it okay to insult her.

So we're all clear: noticing someone coming and going in a lockdown in contravention to his stated intentions = bad. Being insulting and sh*tty to someone who notices such = fine.

Fair enough.

"Now I never thought I’d be this kind of neighbour who is observing when someone leaves and gets home again"

And yet here we are. This situation is really bringing out the best and the worst in people.

^^ although maybe it’s a different crowd and the regular weekly MNers will take up a different view on this if they read it tomorrow

Please mind your own business.

We try and chat with him as much as possible so he isn’t lonely.

On my god! Get over yourself OP.

I haven’t been out at all in 2 weeks.

You REALLY need to get out more.

Getting more and more like an episode of Dad's Army

Neighbourhood watch .

I haven’t been out at all in 2 weeks

Well maybe you should, unless you’re in the shielded group or self isolating due to symptoms. Fresh air and exercise is good for you. Helps you fight of viruses.

*off

FFS- my local FB pages are full of these type of posts
Mind your own fucking business

You have no idea what is happening in his life
And it’s nothing to do with you, unless you’re snogging him over the wall or he’s licking your door handles

I've not worked for 2 weeks but I still go out fairly regularly as I also work for a voluntary organisation. If my neighbours want to spy on me and record my comings and goings they can fill their boots.

Who the fuck even cares OP. Read a book.

He might be sat in a quiet spot fishing...nothing wrong with that.
Gosh I’d hate to live next door to you

Actually OP - I am in a similar situation. I am wfh - study window faces out on to the entrance of my cul-de-sac, so I see all my neighbours moves. The family opposite - 2 very retired individuals and their 30 year old son - all of them, in and out with the car(s) multiple times a day. I've known the family years - so no elderly relatives, no charity work, no going to work (the son cant keep a job - many long supportive conversations with the mum), no horses to feed and keep, no dogs to walk, no grandchildren to see, not on the local village COVID support network, not on the cul-de-sac's whats app group, etc. They are good neighbours, we get on, no feuds, but why the fuck are they going in and out so much every day. (me 2 weeks working from home, out once).

I wont fall out with them, I wont bring it up with them, but it is puzzling. When we next "talk" (shout across 6 feet) to each other I am sure they will tell me. But I do question the necessity. Every time they drive out they are potentially at risk of an accident needing emergency services. We've been asked to stay at home. They don't. Why not?

(They are in a modern house - fridge, freezers etc. They do NOT need to go out multiple times a day).

They are not the only family on the cul-de-sac who behave like this. There is a couple (2 cars), long-retired, family live elsewhere, who each individually go out several times a day and SPEED. I have known this couple nearly 25 years (as neighbours). This is fairly typical behaviour. They are fairly selfish. Again I wont fall out with them. But it is observable that they wont change their lifestyle.

So OP please ignore those on here being rude. Many of us are trying hard to comply with the "rules" but some are just not getting it.

@crazycadetmum
when did we all become so perfect and ready to snitch on each other

When Coronavirus hit us.

My husband has to pop out every other day because he cares for his elderly mother who has alzheimer's and an uncle who is 93. He limits trips, makes sure he does all their shopping in one go etc. but he has to go out.

The week before lockdown began, I was still working but was in/out a lot because I was caring for my dying Nana. This week, I have had to make trips out to the funeral directors, to go to her flat so some equipment could be collected and to the funeral itself.

You really have no idea what's going on in people's lives. Some people may be going out unnecessarily but the vast majority are not and if they are going out,have genuine reasons to.