I’ve been named and ‘shamed’

[EstuaryBird]

Admittedly it’s only on our local WhatsApp group...

Opened it this morning and there’s a message from a ‘founder’ member of the group.

“Me, hubs and the kids were out last night making lots of noise for our NHS heroes. Disappointed to see that some of this group don’t care enough to give up 2 minutes of their time!!! Maybe you forgot..(then a list of names including mine). Will be sending you a reminder next week!!”

I know she’s a twat but I’m fuming. I’m not going to dignify it with a reply because she and her little crew of followers love a public war. I’m just going to ignore her but if she thinks she’s forcing me out next week she’s got another bloody think coming.

Tbh if I wasn’t on lockdown I wouldn’t even give it 2 thoughts but I’m winding myself up about it now!

AIBU to think that clapping is not compulsory and nobody else’s business?

This is the best thread ever. Made my day.

I didnt mean to upset anybody but I just thought it would be nice

Weasel words.

That comes from the same school of linguistics as "I'm not racist, but I just think that a LOT of black people...."

Regardless of whether she thought 'it would be nice' for everybody to clap, the fact is that not everybody did clap, for various reasons, so she extended that in her own twisted logic to think that 'it would be nice' to intimidate and shame people who didn't think the same way as her.

"I wholeheartedly apologise for what I did earlier - I was completely out of order and I am very sorry." That's all she needed to put, without any of the self-justfying.

So, a bit of a damp squib ending, sorry! My DH has told me to let it go because he knows I can get a bit bolshy at times!

Let it go now. She's got all caught up in the hysteria and is now slowly realising her folly ...

Maybe everyone should read The Crucible as homework.

Seriously 😂

I'd be replying with "oh dear, & who made you the lockdown police, perhaps you need another hobby" & then delete

Maybe the Nextdoor app is a better option

....And I'm guessing that she wouldn't even have sent that if Hubs hadn't had 'words' with her to the effect that he did want to keep his friends in the street.

Sounds like you’ve walked into a scene mash-up from Stepford Wives and Mean Girls. It is embarrassing knowing that this kind of person is clapping out of self-indulgent virtue signalling rather than genuine gratitude to the NHS
Also, ”me, hubs and the kids....” - yuck.

I live in a cul-de-sac of 10 houses, at the edge of an estate of about 100 ish.
I opened the window last night to listen, as last week we didn't know about it and didn't hear a thing - it was silent.
Couldn't hear anyone applauding or banging a pan with a wooden spoon or any other "look at me, I'm being a noisy twat because "the S**" told me to"

What a virtue-signalling cuntbag.

I honestly think that people who appoint themselves as spokespeople for these things are the biggest bullies going. Self-obsessed narcs.

The corona virus has seen the mass resurection of Mrs Mangle...highly annoying yet entertaining at the same time!

The hand clapping is a nice gesture of thanks, but shouldn't be compulsory. That was a shocking thing that she did, putting details on Facebook of those who didn't join in, it was a kind online bullying, IMO. It's good that she apologised but I would keep my distance from her now.

Nest Wednesday there's an appreciation for What's App founder group members. Everyone has to stick their bum out of the window at 7 pm

A local WhatsApp group? Christ. There is zero way I would let all the neighbours have my mobile number.

midlifecrash

What is the bear thing you mentioned in your other post?

Apparently we're meant to put things (i.e. rainbows, bears, drawings, etc) in the windows to give the children and dog walkers something to look at when they walk past. The more things you put the more 'good neighbour' points you get apparently. People were posting their addresses and telling people to 'come have a look and a wave' and then naming their bears, offering for others to name the bear as they walk past and encouraging children to leave drawings 'to be displayed next week'. Apparently we're also meant to put lit candles in our windows to show support for all the people who have died.

People were posting 'I saw X, Y and Z in the windows at numbers 14, 16, 18 and 20 but 22 ruined it with nothing in theirs. GET IT TOGETHER Mr and Mrs 22!!!' I came off the group, but then a flyer came through my door.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll. Oh yes, I totally believe she wouldn’t have ‘apologised’ if Hubs hadn’t told her to do it.

SingingInTheShithouse Next Door here is terrible, the number of posts ‘encouraging’ specific streets out to clap is really over the top this week.

“It really isn’t your designated role to ‘name and shame’ people for not going out to clap. I’m glad you see that now. Thank you for apologising.”

Tell her you were busy sewing scrubs. Ie something actually useful to help.

Our street is doing the bears and rainbows without the shaming. I do wonder of some of these instances of shaming are being exaggerated on here.

OP so Mrs. Clap wants to 'just forget it all' now she's been called out?

I didn't clap because I think it's pointless. The first one was a nice idea but I didn't clap then either. Further claps are a waste of time in my opinion and it's not an unreasonable view for anyone to hold either way.

If I were in that group, this is what I'd do - but that would have really pissed me off. I'd have replied to her apology publicly on the group:

Your 'apology' was disingenuos and backhanded. More importantly, your original 'name and shame' message was nasty, controlling, unwarranted and completely against the spirit of a neighbourhood WhatsApp group. For this reason, I am leaving this group and I propose to start a new, Whatsapp group just limited to offering genuine neighbourhood support only.

Then post a message through the doors of all neighbours except her, asking them to message you if they want to join the new group.

I wouldn't care whether anyone did or not because she'd forever be thinking there was a new group she was excluded from.

Petty, childish but utterly and joyously satisfying!

It's a bit of a shame that she was so quick to eat humble pie.

I think i would just reply,

'Thanks for the Apology PC Clap. I trust you will be closing this case now'.

Christ sake. I didn’t go out last night because I was in bed all day vomiting. Nobody has the right to judge. Tell her to bugger off.

I hate the clapping thing. I'd maybe point out that all this clapping, banging and noise might be disturbing the sleep of the key workers who they say they support. Once off is one thing but making it a weekly thing is shit.

I left my street Whatsapp group after someone bollocked me for politely asking a neighbour not to have a bonfire in the middle of the afternoon when people's washing was out. They are also doing all the rainbow crap. We are not. We are probably getting slagged off left right and centre but I don't give a shit.

One of my neighbours was clapping. Is it showing support for the NHS by still having your parents come to your house every day for whatever reasons??