AIBU to think whoever coined the phrase sleeping like a baby...

[Dennisreynoldsduster]

... had clearly never witnessed a baby sleeping.
I’m lying here trying to sleep while three month old DS is thrashing about, whimpering, grunting, noisy breathing combined with big sighs, occasional squeaking or squawking and sometimes coughing (my least favourite) or odd little throat sounds (he has reflux, lot better now but does drop up here and there). Oh and the startling himself awake (either startling or accidentally whacking himself in the face when flailing and thrashing about) ... why just why

He is asleep through all of this while I’m here trying to ignore the rowdy baby goat that’s apparently in the crib next to me

Why are they so bloody noisy? Will he grow out of it any time soon? Currently doing a bout of loud deep breathing followed by little whimpers. I’m going to be whimpering myself if I don’t get to sleep soon

Not sure on the growing out of it, my 10yo quite often startles me during the night when he rolls over and collides with his bedroom wall. He talks in his sleep too.

My 3yo still cosleeps and does a lot of thrashing, grunting, farts followed by sleepy giggles, and this random move where she lifts her legs in the air and then slams them down into the mattress.

Rowdy baby goat I hope you manage to get some sleep soon.

The farting... ye gads the farting.

Why did nobody warn me about the sheer volume (both audio and quantitative) of babies farts?!

I'm just jealous your baby is in a crib next to you :D Our crib was royally rejected!

I say like "slept like a baby, just not Ours" on a serious note, have you tried a swaddle bag, had a friend who's LO started out like yours with the reflux, swaddle bag saved the day (and anti reflux formula 🙂).

I remember this all too well! Our lo used to make this strange grunting noise so I couldn’t sleep. I had a Snuzpod so she was right next to me. She’s in her own room now but still makes noises. She cries out in her sleep, sucks her finger noisily (which I like - ha ha) and thumps her coat with her feet! The only thing she doesn’t do (like others have mentioned) is fart! Well rarely. So yeah... what a stupid phrase...

@TimeAintNothing I have a leg slamming child too. He is a very patient at night 4 month old. If he is hungry and he starts stirring he slams both his legs up and down on the mattress so it echos through the floor. He does cry/yell once he is fully awake.

OP I had a very noisy baby (little monster in my case) and although I have heavy breathing still he has settled down. I think half the issue was he would get cold. He is now in a sleeping bag and settled a lot more than he was when under blankets.

I'm sat now holding a sleeping 4month old DS but when I put him down he wakes up and starts thrashing about. He settles for a few seconds then starts again. This seems to be getting worse the past few nights. He also lifts his legs and slams them down. An hour ago he seemed quite awake and was talking to himself. He's just laughed in his sleep

Just hoping I can get a bit of sleep when he naps today!!

My first baby slept like the dead, for over 12 hour stretches, so of course I thought that was normal. The next one snored on night one, like a fucking old man.

Don't forget the clicking... Swaddling is a good shout as it stops the startle reflex waking them up. Mine sometimes farts so loudly he wakes up...