Nasty text - school parent issue

[Nonnymcannonymousface]

Urgh....I know everyone is stressed about things at the moment but I need a bit of perspective.

So, my DH appeared home from work today and told me he had a text from one of his good friends. It was asking DH a question about something. DH asked his friend how he knew about the issue and friend setbacks him a screen shot of an email he had received from a parent at the school. It included the info in a very shit stiry way but was also fairly rude about me. 😳. My DH wasn’t very impressed but went back and clarified the info

I’ve hardly spoken to this parent. Always been very civil when we have. One of my good friends and her DH are good friends with this person and their partner. My DH and I aren’t as they aren’t people we have particularly gel-ed with but are always happy to chat and have thought we had a perfectly pleasant relationship.

So - thankfully we are housebound for the foreseeable future but I am feeling really awkward about this as we have DC in the same year and obviously they are friends with one of my good friends so am now feeling vaguely paranoid. Actually, a lot paranoid. It’s not very nice to actually know that someone thinks thus a lot me. Plus, I was 😳 that my DH’s friend sent the text on TBH. Can’t go out to meet my friends for wine so turning to MN for some advice

I can't make any sense out of what has happened with you being so cryptic about the content, sorry!

Haha! I can't make any sense of that whatsoever.

it's hard to understand because we don't know what you said, or what they said, or even what it's about!

No idea what your talking about giving the vague information.

Do what?

What's the quote something about "what other people think of me is none of my business"

Easier said than done but this persons opinion is a reflection on them not on you. Carry on being civil, it won't have any affect on your child. Try and forget about it.

When someone is mean about another person I judge the person speaking, not the person they are speaking about.

I'm not sure I follow either.

Is the problem that the other parent was also rude about you, when you've never knowingly had any unpleasant dealings with them?

Or is it that they've mentioned the mystery issue?

If I'm understanding correctly, this is about something you have done or said or a situation that somehow involves you.

If that's the case the what you do now really depends on whether or not you had done something that deserved criticism.

Nope, not the foggiest idea either.

A mutual friend of you and your friend slagged you off in an email?

You need to put your big girl pants one and shake this off. It doesn't matter that everyone doesn't like you - it's the way that life is.

Eh

What?

Sorry - been one of these annoyingly vague posters

In a nutshell, my DH had forwarded onto him today an email which was very rude about me as an aside to the general content. The email was written by one of the parents at school who is a mutual friend of this friend who forwarded it on.

I had always thought we had a perfectly civil relationship. Not close but pleasant and polite. we have only talked about very neutral topics etc so no idea where this has come from. The parent has a child in our child's class. I am somewhat flabbergasted by this and am feeling rather paranoid now. So paranoid that I am now writing incomprehensible posts here. Sorry 😂

This was from a parent at the school

Oh - and the email was quite gratuitously rude about my character as an aside which was totally unrelated to the other issue. Hence why I was 😳 and am wracking my brains as to what I could have possibly said or done.

Why was the parent sending emails about you at all? Are you in the PTA or a governor at the school?

Sorry I still can't follow this at all.

Surely a this at the moment had put this playground shit in perspective for you? It doesn't really matter. Be civil when spoken to by this person but otherwise, drop them off your radar.

Isn't it hard to get a delivery slot at the moment? If you manage to get one can we share? Oh, by the way, I think nonny is a twat

How was your name brought into it?

Pure noseyness on my part I'm afraid

Yes, but what exactly did they say? It sounds pretty unpleasant and I would be tempted to let them know that you know (by making a comment on the content (not the comments about you) and copying them all in (Inc anyone else who may need to see the info if it's school related. In essence, don't confront them directly, but let them know that you know and also let other parents see how unkind they have been. Make them feel bloody awkward and except no apologies.

Jesus. This is so vague! Was the rude email about how vague you are? If so, understandable on their part.

How can you post like this? ‘Something happened but I won’t say what it is. Someone told someone about something that happened and it implied something about me that someone else said. AIBU?’

... yeah you are. But god knows what the hell happened.

C’mon, what did she say?

Why was the parent sending emails about you at all? Are you in the PTA or a governor at the school?

No! So I am gobsmacked.

ola - of course it puts it into perspective. But, like lots of other people, I'm feeling fairly discombobulated at the moment which has probably made me more emotional. I don't actually want to discuss it with my friends in due course as a lot of them are also parents at the school and I am certainly not a shit stirrer. So it's not very nice to see this written down in black and white when cut off from your usual coping stragies like going to the gym or meeting some friends further away who aren't school parents and getting it off your chest

Okay - so it’s something like...

Friend to DH: Hey, is Nonny okay? I heard she wasn’t well?
DH: What? Who told you about that?
Friend to DH: Oh, it came up in this email...

Email: Nonny isn’t getting involved because she’s not feeling very well. Not suprising really. She’s always been a bit selfish.

That kind of thing?