To be so peeved with MIL attitude to ‘stay home’

[Ohmaidaiz]

I’m sure I’m not the first or last thread of this nature!
MIL defies the stay at home/no social interaction rules, continues to see her sister who lives in same village everyday!
Now I completely understand it’s hard for them both (both live alone) but ffs, they are carrying on like they’re exempt from the rules! MIL has her sister over for a cuppa and they’re both interacting with others in the village.
What really grinds is the fact that, on the whole, it’s the elderly who will suffer if they contract coronavirus. So the truth is largely, we are all staying home and not seeing our friends and family in person to save the elderly. (Yes I know that young people and those without existing health conditions die from it too but on the whole it is the elderly who are suffering the most) and then there’s quite a few of the elderly flouting these rules even though they’re put in place to give the NHS a fighting chance of saving their lives when they contract corona. Just infuriates me!!

If you'd said that your mil only sees her sister and no-one else (and vice versa for the sister) then I'd be a tiny tiny bit understanding.
But also seeing other people in the village is ridiculous.
I've just got back from my daily dog walk and saw three people who are almost age 80 out walking.
It's beyond frustrating and disappointing. Some people just don't seem to get how important it is.

As I just said on another thread, people must follow the rules to ensure we get through this as quickly as possible with the minimum loss of life.

People always think the rules apply to other people, not them.

There probably isn't much you can do with your MIL though, stubbon people aren't likely to be persuaded by rational ideas like "staying in = less deaths".

I have heard some very elderly people being very resentful of these rules. Those who know they are in the last months/years of life anyway. They would rather spend that time with friends and family, even if that shortened the time they have than isolated afraid to touch anything. I think they've got a point.

and what if they do catch it and end up in hospital taking up a precious ICT bed and infecting half a dozen poor nurses/doctors as they dont have enough PPE ?

But they don't really have a point @KenDodd, because it's not just the elderly that may die (see the news of the poor 21 year old). And all the people whose chemotherapy has been stopped because hospitals are expecting to be overloaded. It is a selfish attitude because it only considers the effect on their own lives.

@KenDood they have a point from a personal point of view but it's not just themselves they are endangering, its everyone else they come into contact with.

@KenDodd tell the poor NHS workers that are working tirelessly to save people who have it that they've got a point

Surely one could move in the with other for a few weeks? @KenDodd whilst I sort of understand where you are coming from, that is madness! You would rather potentially make your family and friends seriously ill or worse DIE than adhere to the rules for a few weeks. Incredibly selfish!

Dh and I used to joke that we live in a retirement village. It’s mainly elderly that herewith very few young children.

Lots of elderly out doing their gardens and having a chat to people passing by - they are stood a couple of meters away though.

Nothings really changed here!

If they are too lonely could they temporarily move in together?

Yes if they lived together this would be ok. They should move in together.

If they were seeing only each other this would be quite understandable. But they should stop seeing others.

Why don’t they move in together. I’ve seen elderly say well I have to die somehow but they are putting others in danger

Anyone of any age should be following the rules in place.

This will just be another thread where it's an opportunity to have a go at the elderly.

I heard an elderly person ranting in the street to two pals "they're picking on people our age" last week. Well no, we're trying to stop you from dying and from killing other people FFS. Two days ago a middle aged man in Aldi was saying that he'd be in every day now the pubs were shut as he was really bored, while touching a member of staff on the arm! He then tried to chat to a woman with a small baby, standing about an inch away from her. He was buying a chocolate milkshake.

It makes me think we'll be isolated a hell of a lot longer because of these fuckwits.

I'd ignore them and let them take their own risk. Bloody hard to do but some people won't take it seriously until it affects them or they know someone that is suffering because of the virus. I'm grateful my dad took it seriously and is at home. It's burying their head in the sand time, won't last for long

If they get sick and can't be saved they will die alone that's the saddest part without a proper funeral.

A 90 yo woman I know, is determined to carry on as normal. I spoke to her on the phone on Monday, she said this is likely to be the last year of her life and she's not spending it alone in her flat.

For what it's worth, I don't think this would be her last year, unless she got CV.

You are extremely delusional to think its just the elderly who can have severe consequences from the virus

@Leaanb don’t you read the OP? I’m well aware it’s not just the elderly who suffer from Covid but they do make up the majority of those suffering and dying from it!!

@Bunbunbunny that’s the other thing. If she got sick and had to go to hospital it’s not like we could go visit her without risking spreading it back from the hospital!

Well it may be that some of these elderly people would die soon anyway although many wouldn't, but not only is in selfish to put others at risk as people have said above, but they really will very likely have a horrific death if they succumb to this. I am sure when slowly suffocating either alone at home or in a ward crammed full of other suffocating strangers with no resources available to ease their struggle, they will wish they had followed the rules. Or would do if they were capable of thinking straight in that situation rather than just desperately gasping for breath.

Some people might look at it differently and say well, if I believe I only have a few months left, I am not going to spend it putting the lives of much younger people at risk and potentially taking decades from them.

There will be no hospital visits to anyone.

It's out of sight out of mind :( My best friend lost her Dad on Saturday to the virus and my Dad's best friend is in a coma due to the virus and today they've asked to turn the machines off. It breaks my heart I can't see my dad to comfort him and we know we won't be able to say goodbye to some we love dearly. I'm still praying he pulls through this. I can't comfort my best friend in ways I normally would either by being there for her. I feel completely useless and I don't know when I'll be able to see my Dad as we both have underlying health conditions that put us at risk. The government are going to be dammed either way if the deaths are low then people will say they over reacted or if it's too high they did too little but people forget it's their own actions that has an impact. I'm trying hard not to feel emotional when all I want to do is help :(

@Bunbunbunny I'm so so sorry for your losses.

I'm a community nhs nurse and was in a warden controlled home yesterday seeing one of my patients. The warden collared me as I went in to say she's having an absolute nightmare trying to enforce the rules on the residents there. She's shut down the lounge and stopped the residents using the dining room, only one in the laundry etc. When I got to my patient her and her husband were FUMING with the restrictions!

This is a lady with end stage COPD gasping for breath. I think it's lack of awareness and maybe some ignorance around it, the reality is just not sinking in.