cancelled birthday, what to do with gift

[tp777]

Friend cancelled her toddler’s birthday due to Coronovirus, do we still give the presents?

Absolutely, it’s the party that’s been cancelled, not the birthday

Please give the gift. It’s an awful time for a child to have a birthday. It’s DS birthday next week and he can’t see his grandparents or cousins.

Leave it on the door step. My dd’s bday is today is she has had everything cancelled.

Well when people cancelled on us in the past, they didn’t send the presents, am surprised so many of you say you would. I wasn’t sure of the etiquette

It's a completely different set of circumstances, they are cancelling to protect you as well as themselves and everyone else who was invited.

Of course you should still send the gift! Ffs

Ffs you are asking because there was no formal Celebration. Seriously?

Of course still send or leave gift on doorstop. More so now then ever to show love and support to everything especially those you were going to spend a few hours with.

Well when people cancelled on us in the past

I’m at a loss to your lack of compassion. They didn’t ‘cancel’. They are following Gov instructions and not having a party

OP don’t give a gift/message/card when you obviously do not want to. The would be receipent would be under some sort of obligation to you in your head so don’t bother.

Yes I would

Of course! Why would you consider withholding the gift, just because the party was cancelled?!

I think it is somewhat different circumstances here. They aren't cancelling cos they can't be bothered to hold a party. They are following Government guidelines and recommendations. They't went just choosing to cancel the party for the sake of it.

Of course you can always choose not to give the gift. No one will force you to do so after all.

Its just that it wold be a nice gesture to still send it for the little child.

We've just cancelled DD's 18th birthday party. We cancelled it before the closure announcements. We cancelled due to the growing concerns and the advice to practise social distancing. We cancelled it to be responsible members of society, to help reduce the spread of this virus - not because we no longer fancied having a party. DD is much older and understands, but having an eagerly anticipated party suddenly cancelled is disappointing enough without adding to it.

Well is it the norm to give a present for the birthdays you aren’t going to?

If you decline the invitation, no. But you would have gone to this one if it had gone ahead and have actually bought a present, so why would you not hand it over?
It’s not the child’s fault the party was cancelled?!

Well is it the norm to give a present for the birthdays you aren’t going to?

When will you get it into your head that nothing about the current situation is normal.

You don’t want to give a gift. Then don’t. Stop trying to justify your ridiculous thought process.

Yes, I’ve bought birthday presents for friends children when we haven’t been invited to their party. Send the gift

God, re reading your op, it’s your friend’s toddler, not even just a school friend of your child! Would you not have given them a gift anyway, even if they hadn’t held a party?

You're mean OP

Bad enough that the poor kid has to miss out on her party. Give her her pressie OP.

Just give them the bloody gift! You've bought it so you may as well pass it on. They didn't have much choice in cancelling so the least you can do is bring that child a bit of joy on their birthday

I would give her the present. It's for a child who is probably very upset at not having a party.

I think it is the right thing to do under these circumstances.

Why would it be abnormal to give someone a present for their birthday? Just because there is no party doesn’t mean a gift should be rescinded. Just take it, leave it on the doorstep and knock and wave from the street.

You're mean OP

Mean spirited and a Scrooge.

Well is it the norm to give a present for the birthdays you aren’t going to?

If you're really that mean then put the child's present on a Ebay 😳

Normally I wouldn't give presents for a party we couldn't attend. But DS (7) has been invited 2 parties this month, both very good friends (my reaction would have been different if it had been an all-class party invite where we didn't know the party child) and he would have gone if it was a different situation. So we gave presents at school last week. It's terrible for a small child to both not get a party or any present.

Well is it the norm to give a present for the birthdays you aren’t going to?

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
These are strange and unusual circumstances, so normal rules wouldn't actually happen.

However, in a normal world situation: child is having party and lots of friends invited; child gets ill and has to cancel at late notice. Would you still give the gift to the ill child?

Personally I would.

I think this situation is comparable. I would still give. It would feel mean spirited to me not to do so.

But OP - you clearly don't want to, so don't. No ones going to force you too.