Fallen out with neighbours

[Pooshweens]

Not sure how to handle this situation with our next door neighbours

Until now, we have been good friend with them since they moved in a couple of years ago. We've had bbqs, drinks, play dates with them etc and they seemed lovely

They do like to party and often wake me up at night with noise, to which I rarely say anything (unless it wakes the baby for
Example)

On Sunday morning, I found a wine glass had been chucked into our garden. My 2 year old almost stepped on the glass bare foot until I clocked it, and it was a pain to clear up as it had shattered everywhere. We have 2 small kids so this annoyed me thinking they could have walked on it. I also cut my hand clearing it up

Having found the glass, I sent them a message saying what they had happened and could they have a word with their guests (I knew they'd had people over from the noise, and could also see a smashed glass on their patio)

They didn't apologise but instead left the chat. My DH then saw them yesterday and they basically said they were fed up of me complaining to them about the noise at night. I felt this was uncalled for when he told me, and having checked all of our chats, I have asked them very nicely if they can keep the noise down, two times since nov 2018

They also denied any of their guests doing it, but our other neighbours are 80 year olds so I don't think it's them!

So their reaction seems harsh to me. AIBU? I then sent her a nice message, to ask about all these supposed messages, and she just said she didn't want to argue and hoped we could move on from this. Isn't that a bit extreme? As I wasn't arguing, just trying to straighten it out

Sorry, this is a bit of a storm in a tea cup and long winded to explain but I feel a bit put out!

You're in the right but they sound determined to be unreasonable.

They don’t like being told off so are making out your a nag and make themselves as the victim of your nagging

They're dicks

They aren't nice people and they are more interested in partying than being good neighbours or friends. You should have complained properly about their noise years ago. Don't be so nice about it!

It's them not you op

YANBU - neighbours like that are the reason people feel like Britain is broken. They should have apologised and demonstrated their understanding that someone in their party had had a serious short-circuit of their "reasonable" chip. They are entitled, selfish, pompous twats with chips on their shoulder probably from days of being inadequate (school days?) who now would rather be chin-raising paragons of indignation rather than allow anyone to feel they have right to tell them off (which is how they will have interpreted your reasonable approach). People like this grind my gears - why can't they just hold their hands up and say, "What a fucking embarrassment; that's blood awful - I'm so sorry." Has anyone seen "Eden Lake"? ("Not my kids.").

I do find this odd, when people who don't modify their behaviour get "fed up" with others continuing to complain about it. As if they ignore it for long enough it will cease to be a problem!

Selfish wankers. Don't bother yourself. Why would you want a friendship with people who act like this anyway? They're decided that rather than changing their behaviour and acting like good neighbours they'll fall out with you and make you out to be the problem instead. Since your friendship is over I'd get the council involved if the noise disturbances continue. They'll write to them and if it still carries on they'll issue you with equipment to record the noise.

I wonder if they woke up hungover with ‘the fear’ and that’s why they left the chat. And we’re embarrassed of their guests shitty behaviour yesterday?
Her message since seems much more reasonable.

Sling it back over their fence.

Blame your 80 year old neighbours, high on Sanatogen tonic wine and iron jelloids. Say they had a glass-tossing competition in the garden.

You know this is true because you found a broken glass in your garden too, and you know it didn't come from CFNeighbour , so it must have been from the oldies.

One consolation of coronavirus, presumably they won't be able to have any more parties for a bit.

Do you mean, the exited the Whatsap thread (or similar)?

What exactly did you say in the text? To be honest, I probably would not say something over any isolated incident like this but their reaction was unimpressive.

Judy they actually had a party last night would you believe!

Schaden I would love to do that, I definitely considered it on Sunday morning

I bet they do continue to have party’s. Some people are just unreasonable.

Selfish bastards

Shocked you'd let your child walk around outside barefooted?? What about cat poo or stones?

Sounds like they're trying to gaslight you. Just respond by saying "Please stop deflecting and apologise for your guest's disgusting & disrespectful behaviour and then we'll say no more about it"

Sounds like they're trying to gaslight you. Just respond by saying "Please stop deflecting and apologise for your guest's disgusting & disrespectful behaviour and then we'll say no more about it"

Yes, that's the perfect response.

Whaaat?!? They sound terrible neighbours. Who has non-stop late night parties when there are tiny children sleeping next door?

Making some noise is unavoidable, but partying and shouting and music late at night is certainly not that!

I am paranoid about my kids making noise - my neighbour is an elderly lady who is always there, and our staircases and front doors are right together. I don't let them play on the stairs/race up and down at night (Well, I try). They will make noise during the day, but it can't happen at night. We all have to be considerate. Your neighbours aren't. The guests chucking glass about is completely out of order too. I'd get the police to have a word if that happens again.

We once lived next to an appartment that was rented out quite cheaply for shortish periods of time. It attracted all sorts. After every party my ex (wannabe dj) would get up at 6 in the morning and play the loudest, most awful punk records that he had through his professional speakers. They all never did it again.

@itgetsthehoseagain Well said, you’ve hit the nail on the head. I’m utterly sick of people with this mindset and there are so many of them. It’s a peculiarly Gen X trait I think, and it started with the decline of discipline in schools.

If it wasn’t their guests, that means it was them.

There is no reasoning with people like this .What utter arseholes . What if one of your DC had cut themself ? As above PP said they are the type to carry on having parties ,even with the corona virus rules in place to stop social contact .