to think that funeral video is a little bit too much?

[FearlessSwiftie]

My best friend's grandma had passed away the other day and the funeral is tomorrow. Among other things my friend ordered a special funeral video with her grandmother photos and some videos from family archive. There also will be a song by Leonard Cohen and my friend says the video will be played while people would be saying their farewell to her grandma. I don't mean to sound petty but it seems to be too much to my mind. A VIDEO at the funeral! I can't even imagine it, but I'm not going to tell my friend that, this video idea makes her happy. AIBU?

I completely misunderstood. I thought you meant they were having a video made of the funeral itself. I was going to say YANBU but actually, yes YABU.

Did this for my FIL. A slide show of photos of him, and a song played as part of the funeral. During the bit you'd normally have quiet time to pray if you were having a religious funeral. It was actually really lovely

How kind of you to not tell your friend how you feel about her grandmother’s funeral arrangements that aren’t to your personal taste and instead discuss it on a public forum instead.

We had a photo montage video set to music at both my parents funerals, at the crematorium. We just sent them the photos and music choice and they did it all. People loved them and we put a few humorous ones in to lighten the mood (very in keeping with their personalities). I really don't understand your objection.

That sounds lovely. YABU

I think that this could be a really nice way for people to remember their loved one. It isn't right for everyone, and if you don't like the idea, @FearlessSwiftie, that is fine. You're supporting your friend and keeping your feelings about the video to yourself - exactly what a good friend would do.

All the people saying it would be terrible and intrusive to video a funeral, sadly it is necessary sometimes.

My friend's funeral was videoed for her father who was in a coma following the car crash that killed her.

My friend died of cancer and she filmed a piece to be played at here funeral

At my uncles funeral we had a photo slide show.

My cousins little boy. She played a video of him playing in his little car in the garden- why because you have never seen a happier child than in that video and that is how she wanted him remembered.

It’s pretty normal these days, for many funerals are no longer days to dress head to toe in black, face like a slapped arse and with a vicar droning on. Many people now want a celebration of there life.

@ItsAllTheDramaMickIJustLoveIt I think so too. Online space is completely safe while you are being anonymous which I certainly am, so people can share their views and ask questions as long as they want. I'm surprised by how many people don't understand that and judge me for posting something they don't agree with.

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius @Sweetener12 thanks!

Not only is it a nice tribute but for the relatives or friends putting it together it gives them a sense of purpose and something to focus on in that awful limbo time leading up to the funeral.

I edited a video for my grandad's funeral, though we showed it at the wake. I didn't want to read anything out at the funeral (had a newborn to look after), but the process of making the video allowed me to process the same feelings, and my family all still have it now and watch it fondly.

Surely it's essentially just a slideshow but in a more structured order? I can't see why you'd have an issue with that.

It’s a video photo montage, not the person’s last moments... it’s a nice way of sharing pictures. Calm yourself.

Its the norm in the states to have a video montage of the deceased and their loved ones. People get upset when there isnt one

We had this at my mother's funeral, it was lovely. YABVU.

Online space is completely safe while you are being anonymous which I certainly am, so people can share their views and ask questions as long as they want. I'm surprised by how many people don't understand that and judge me forpostingsomething they don't agree with.

Are you really surprised that you post something on an open forum that thousands of people would have done at their loved ones funerals and judge you for expressing your judgement at it.

Why come onto an open forum, full of people at varying stages of grief and start a thread judging your friend doing something so personal?

We did a video with photo montage for my mother's funeral. We had it running on a loop in one part of the room where we had the reception after the service. Everyone went over at some point to view it. I think it's especially important for people to see something of a person's whole life, especially young people in the family, who may only have a sense (and sadly often ageist view) of the person as old. My mother died in her mid-90s, and there was a great picture of her at about age 25 or so in a boat wearing shorts and a blouse tied at the waist holding up a great string of fish she had just caught with a huge smile on her face. That was a side of her most of the younger members of the family never saw before.

My aunty had this at her funeral. It was beautiful and a celebration of her life.
I find church funerals with the odd hymn at intervals that nobody knows how to sing completely impersonal.

YABVVVVU!!!

I did a slide show for my DM's funeral last year. Putting it together really helped me. I laughed and cried at memories.

You have no right to judge your friend. A horrible post

My aunty had this at her funeral. It was beautiful and a celebration of her life.

This. We had serious and hilarious photos at my Mum's funeral, I have photos of her in the chapel of rest and a video of her funeral. Judge away because I don't care what anybody else thinks, it was right for me.

Just let people say goodbye and grieve how they choose to. It’s not causing any harm, leave them be.

Yabvu op it's a wonderful idea and more people should do it ! I do understand that everyone has different views as long as you are a supportive friend that's all that matters