To cuddle my 2 year old DC to sleep at night?

[ComeOnEileen11]

Or to at least sit with them til they fall asleep...
I know that I should be working on putting them in bed, saying goodnight and leaving them to fall asleep.
I BF DC to sleep until 15 months then moved to cuddling them. They're now 2 and settle with either me or DH sat by the bed, sometimes with a hand resting on them or being cuddled to sleep.
DC is a very affectionate and cuddly child and often climbs onto me for cuddles throughout the day and loves to snuggle up.
Still will nap in bed/the car/the pushchair etc though so it's not exclusively being cuddled.
Complicating factor is that we have a baby on the way so DC1 has a sibling arriving shortly.
I do love our snuggles though. If DC1 wakes at night (rarely - if poorly or teething) I will try a good long while to settle them back in bed before snuggling them in my bed.
Am I being unreasonable?
I mean, they won't want this as they get older. DH doesn't object. My sister did the same and get DC settle nicely on their own now and have from about 3 years old. DM and MIL disapprove.

Enjoy it while you can!
I first breastfed, then rocked them to sleep until they were about 1. Then i sat/cuddled with them.
They are now 4 and 5 and i still do that twice a week with each.
Its literally the best time of the day for me. Im in bed with them cuddling and they tell me everything about their day or whatever is on their mind. I dont always stay until they are fully asleep now.
I swap with DH, so we have 1 child each and swap the next day.
They fall asleep on their own some nights as well, but we all love the cuddly times.

Yes there's something about bedtime, a cuddle and a chat. Lovely.
Then suddenly they're teenagers... no cuddles, a chat if you're lucky, and going to bed the same time as you

I fed my son to sleep until he was 3. It's fine, perfectly normal. Your DM and MIL can take their beaks elsewhere.

Ours is still cuddled to sleep, we all enjoy it and pretty sure they won't still need it at 18, so don't worrt about it. 😊

How is everyone cuddling multiple children to sleep?
What if you’re a single parent? Or partner works evenings?

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with your routine if it works for you and your child but it’s going to be pretty tough to do this with a newborn isn’t it? I’ve got 18 mths between mine and I couldn’t logistically manage it as partner often working nights. I have an incredibly clingy youngest as well. I wouldn’t get away with a long snuggle session - we do cuddles and stories on the sofa then off to bed with a kiss and quick snuggle so I can get back to baby.
It might be wise to at least know that she can self soothe occasionally? What if you have to stay in hospital for a week after baby comes or something? I’d be worried if she couldn’t manage the odd time without me

If it works for you carry on and enjoy it.
We hugged our children to sleep until they didn't need it any more. My husband has always worked away from home a lot and it was a great bonding time for him when he was here.
I'll never regret a single night hugging a child in their bed or ours and neither will he. It was a short but lovely time in our lives. Only ten to twelve years, but now it seems it was a blinking of an eye.
Cherish it.
If you don't like it, ignore me!

We snuggle our almost 3 yr old to sleep each night. We also co-sleep.

He sleeps right through. We just love being close to him.

He’s such an easy-going child too.

We’re moving soon and he has asked for a Dino room, I have no doubt he’ll transition to sleeping alone then. :( Maybe I’ll go in there with him 😄

The girls are 8yrs old and soon 5.5yrs old and they take themselves to bed, read a book and fall asleep whilst I deal with their brother.

How cheerless for a 5 year old especially to bot even be read to at night

But it's ok you're breastfeeding a 3 year old and hugging him to sleep whilst your girls are left to it.

I cuddle my two and four year olds to sleep. I have one arm around each of them 💕 before transferring them to their beds. I didn't realise I shouldn't do this or anyone would think it was wrong. They both sleep well and I love the sleepy cuddles so much.

I have a 2 and a half year old and a 10 month old.
Before the youngest was born the oldest did co sleep, but we knew when a new baby came along we couldn't all sleep in the same room. Everyone would just be waking up everyone else.
About a month before my due date me and DH took it in turns getting DS1 to sleep in his bed, we cuddled him until he fell asleep, and if he woke up in the night, took him back to his own bed and cuddled him back to sleep.
Then when DS2 was born we started taking it in turns, one with DS1, the other with DS2.
Once paternity leave ended DH cuddles DS1 to bed most nights, and deals with his occasional night wakings.
DS2 can wake up everything from 1 to 10 times a night, but is probably around 3 times. So I get him back to sleep as I'm the SAHM.
I don't think theres anything wrong with snuggling your babies to sleep.
And I think it would be a bit hard on him to stop because of a new baby.

I do the same with my two year old.

I sit with my nearly 4 year old until he’s asleep 🤷‍♀️ (Doesn’t take too long if he’s been active enough that day and they look cute when asleep)

Well I lie with my DS until he's asleep every night. He's nearly 7. Not bothered what anyone thinks.

As someone currently navigating the jealousy between my 2 year old and 3 month old, I HIGHLY recommend you get the self soothing sorted. Your eldest won’t know any different once they’re used to it, but you’re setting yourself up for serious hassle otherwise IMO. Mine has gone to sleep by himself since he was a year old or so, and bedtime is still a favourite time to play up because he’s tired. Your 2yo will feel so pushed out when you can’t do it as you’re with the baby...

I have a very long almost 4 year old and I still cuddle her to sleep a few nights a week. Now that I'm 27 weeks pregnant I need a bit of help from DH lifting her off me and putting her in her bed on the other nights she lays in her bed and drifts off after a story, so no problems with settling. Do what feels right for you both

If you're happy then carry on. I would say maybe if you aren't sure if it'll be as easy to do with a newborn as well maybe figure something out so that it isn't just baby arrives, mum and dad stop cuddling me to sleep; thats a lot of change at once.

I bf to sleep until 17m then continued to lie with DS until about 18m when it was DH turn to do bedtime. By that point it was taking about an hour of lying silently and still in a dark room. DH had to nip to the toilet and explained to DS. By the time he was back 2 minutes later DS was fast asleep! It turned out us being there was actually disrupting him and now we have a lovely time getting him to bed and at 3.5 he still goes straight to sleep. It seemed manageable to comfort him at the time but as soon as that stage was over I was so glad to have my evenings back. I was getting in from work at 19.30, lying in DS room until 20.30, quick shower and shove dinner in to be back in bed for 21.00 as started work at 7am the next morning. It really wasn't all that healthy looking back!

Do whatever makes you both the happiest and gets you the maximum amount of sleep. At 2 mine both likes being cuddled to sleep - by 4 neither wanted/needed it

I know parents who have had to maintain this until their children are well into the primary years. They hate the lack of time to themselves in the evening. Its no good for your mental health and seriously your children need to get used to sleeping by themselves. It might be cute now but when they are 9 and screaming at you to still be holding their hand past 9pm, you'll wish you had had another tactic to getting them to sleep. Especially with another one on the way!!

Self soothing is a great skill to have. You are cuddling to sleep for your benifit, not theirs.

I get in bed with my two every night to read stories and sing songs and snuggle. They are 8 and 5. We all love it. Sometimes they fall asleep while I’m in there, sometimes I do. Sometimes I leave before they have drifted off. Works for us!

They tell me they’ll still want me to do that when they are 15.... let’s see

Up to you what you do but don't you ever go for a night out? What happens or would happen if you left them with a babysitter or family to put them to bed?

@ooooohbetty I was going to ask the same

My 4 (almost 5yr old) still likes to be cuddled to sleep, he is able to go to sleep by himself if im busy with his sisters but at least 5 nights a week i cuddle him and i sit in their bedroom whilst they go to sleep partly because the 3 of them would keep each other awake but also because they like knowing im near. It wont last forever and if it was taking hours i probably would rethink but they are all usually asleep within 10mins so if they need the comfort of having me close then im happy to carry on sitting there.

I think that’s why second children are often considered easier, grump

DC1 cuddled, rocked, sang to for hours until she falls asleep

DC2 lights out, night night