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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it’s normal to give to grandmothers on Mother’s Day.

51 replies

GA2012 · 10/03/2020 17:27

Do you give cards to gifts to your children’s grandmothers or your own grandmothers??

I’ve always done so for my granny/dc’s great Granny and I also get a card and gift for dc to give to my mum - their Granny.

All the shops have cards and gifts for grandparents too so I always thought it was normal. I’ve always liked to treat my own granny. She’s an incredible woman. I’ve only ever met my granny on my mums side. I don’t know my dad or his family.

My partner doesn’t think it’s normal and you should just get for your mum and that’s it. He doesn’t think dc should get a card or anything for his mum - nanny.

Who’s being unreasonable here?

He was never close to his grandmothers so maybe that’s why he doesn’t think it’s normal?

OP posts:
FluffyAragog · 10/03/2020 17:28

We don't in our house, I wouldn't think it odd though if others did.

user1483387154 · 10/03/2020 17:29

nope. never.

Tobebythesea · 10/03/2020 17:29

I personally don’t and find it a bit weird. They’re a mother but not your mother.

Myneighboursnorlax · 10/03/2020 17:31

I was never brought up to do so, but DH was, and even now as adults MIL insists we send something to her mum. I’ve always thought it was weird!

EmrysAtticus · 10/03/2020 17:32

No neither DH or I do.

Original poster
GA2012 · 10/03/2020 17:32

Thank you. Interesting to know your thoughts. I was always brought up to do so.

Like I said in my original post my grandmother is incredible. She had a massive input in my upbringing so maybe that’s why?

OP posts:
Spied · 10/03/2020 17:33

I always gave a card and present to my great grandmother, grandmother and mum. As a young child I also bought a card for an aunt who was like a second mum to me.
I continue the tradition with my own DC.
Dp doesn't have the same kind of close relationship with his family but our DC do give his mum a card.

hammeringinmyhead · 10/03/2020 17:33

It is weird. But MiL always made DH send his nan a card so now we have a toddler we feel obliged to send her and my mum both a Grandma and a Mum card.

DuesToTheDirt · 10/03/2020 17:33

Everyone seems to be included these days...I just bought a card for my mum, and next to it was a card saying, "To my wife on mother's day." Confused

TeenPlusTwenties · 10/03/2020 17:33

We don't.
I buy for my DM. My DC's buy for me (hopefully).

Miscella · 10/03/2020 17:33

Absolutely, always have done - cards and some flowers/pot plant and chocolate.

DesLynamsMoustache · 10/03/2020 17:34

I do! She always gets a card and some flowers Smile Makes her happy so why not?

strawberrylipgloss · 10/03/2020 17:34

Only if the grandmothers play a mothering role imo.
I've seen Mother's Day cards for stepmothers, aunties, grandmothers... and I assumed that it was for that reason

greensnail · 10/03/2020 17:35

Yes, I always gave my grandmother a card and my children do for their Granny and Grandma. It's mothering Sunday or mother's day so I think grandmothers definitely count in that. We don't do grandparents day though which I think is a thing now.

user1493413286 · 10/03/2020 17:35

I was brought up sending a card to my grandmother so my DC now do it; I don’t think there’s any right or wrong but it’s nice and I miss it now my grandmother has died so I would say there’s no harm in it

DeeCeeCherry · 10/03/2020 17:35

We don't, but if others do or don't I can't see why it's even an issue - if you knew it was normal you'd know lots of people who did it, and wouldn't need to ask here. As you likely asked your H & he said No, then that's his own personal norm which is absolutely fine. You can still do cards if you want to. I don't recall ever seeing a grandma card for Mothers Day but perhaps that's because it wouldn't cross my mind to search.

nagynolonger · 10/03/2020 17:35

I didn't give anything to my grandmas growing up. My parents gave them cards and a bunch of flowers. As children we made cards and picked daffodils for our mums. Back in the day when everyone called it Mothering Sunday.

BennyBanana · 10/03/2020 17:36

Absolutely yes. Why not? It’s nice to show appreciation.

Twospaniels · 10/03/2020 17:37

No. I give to my own mother and my children give to me.

Mayhapitis · 10/03/2020 17:37

I've never done this.

Minimamame · 10/03/2020 17:39

YABU

outnumberedmummy · 10/03/2020 17:39

I’ll give my mom a card and flowers from me and the kids and will do the same for my nan

WillowySnicket · 10/03/2020 17:39

Yes, totally! In fact, we (growing up) used it as a general "Mothering Sunday" celebration of motherhood in general. So would give little flowers etc to women who were mothers, grandmothers, mother-figures. Just our culture, perhaps.

underfall · 10/03/2020 17:40

Not all grandparents want their grandchildren to be told they “have to” draw a card / choose a gift for more than one mummy.

What if grandmother’s mother is still around? More compulsory card-drawing / gift-giving for the children?

Birthday and xmas is surely enough

Thisismyusernamefornow · 10/03/2020 17:40

Normal in my family.