Are high heels used to make women weaker?

[angell84]

I am in a cafe having a cup of tea with a friend.

A small woman stumbled in, in high heels that she could barely walk in. She was with a large domineering man - he was striding ahead, and she could barely keep up.

I looked at her, and I had a thought that I have had a few times.

Why do women wear high heels? And Why do the fashion industry keep pushing high heels at women?

They are uncomfortableto wear, they physically hurt us in the long run- I looked at a scientific study online before I wrote this. It said that wearing high heels weaken women's muscles.

And they make us incredibly weak and vulnerable - we are barely able to walk - let alone run, wearing them. I.e it suits men with bad intentions - for us to wear them.

Does anyone else think this?

I love heels. My DP prefers me to not wear them, I say stuff him I love wearing them and always have. They’ve always kept my legs nice and toned? No weakness, though I appreciate they’re not great on the old knees, but neither road running! Can’t win!

Yabu and that comes from someone who owns not a single pair of high heels now.

And pp is correct. Fashion industry promotes it, because it sells. They won't spend money on something what doesn't sell.
"They force us to wear it by promoting it"... If there only was something what could save us.. independent will? Own thought?

Everyone can wear what they won't. If you don't like high heels, don't wear them. I you like them, wear them.

She was with a large domineering man - he was striding ahead, and she could barely keep up
Just want to add that this is how we walked into places with my friend (The striding ahead) number of times because I was fuming after all afternoon of "wait a sec, slow down, the heels ya know"🙄

I absolutely love heels and have almost exclusively worn them since I was c.14/15 (now mid-30s)

I’m pretty tall anyway but in heels I’m 6ft + so I always feel more uncomfortable NOT wearing them as I’ve grown so used to being eye to eye with most men & when I take them off it feels weird to suddenly be “looking up”.

I used to practice walking up and down a stoney lane to my friend’s house when I first started wearing them (practising for fantasies of being on a catwalk 😂) so I find them as comfortable - actually far more comfortable more - than flats.

I also love the sound of wearing heels walking down an empty corridor... not sure why!

I wear them because I enjoy wearing them. I have a couple of pairs that are incredibly comfortable, and I’ve worn them all day in very active jobs and my feet haven’t aches, unlike some other shoes/trainers/boots.

I can walk, run and dance the night away in them. Like all my other footwear they fit properly with no toes/heels overhanging - wtf is this about?

I also see the fashion industry use other footwear not just heels. They aren’t forcing anyone to purchase anything. Like other advertisers, they are just saying this is what we have available.

Oh and I have a few that I can simply kick off and run if needed. I have some flats that are heavy to run in, but the laces prevent them for being easily kicked off. And unlike my heels I cannot run in them.

I love heels but can no longer wear them. Or to be more precise I loved my ONE pair of heels that were comfortable, looked good and I could run in them.

Now I consider high heel shoes as works of art. Something that we can appreciate the beauty of without feeling the need to wear them.

A leg length discrepancy, bad back, knees, hips and joints as well as a tendency to go over on my ankles means I rarely wear heels now.

It's just fashion. I find wearing calf length boots worse than heels. Just because they're uncomfortable and some people have difficulty with them doesn't make a big plot by men to control. My husband doesn't buy my shoes, I do. When I was younger some of the fashions were a bit different, it all changes and you buy what you want. I suspect its less to do with men controlling than women fitting in with their peer group.

Haha yea the art of the shoe.
I do have a thing for shoes.
I have some that are wonderful to look at and that’s why I bought them. I’ve never been able to walk in them, but they appeal to me in some way.

I see some people suggesting that it's just individual choice, and that the industry responds just to what people want to buy. I think that is over simplifying things. What makes us like the things we do?

If you look at fashion through the ages, or across different countries, it's pretty clear that what we think of as "attractive" is driven by culture. Ie by the society we live in and societal norms and expectations.

And it's pretty clear to me anyway that society rewards ( approves of ) women and girls more for "looking good" and following fashion , and it rewards men more for other things. needing to belong to society is fundamental to humans.

And the fashion industry plays on that, the more people it can persuade to like the same new thing, the lower their costs and the higher their profits.

It's a self reinforcing circle , so working out where anything started is hard. But I suspect that misogyny played a role in ensuring that high heels remain a polished and professional look for women but not for men.

I wear heels probably a few times a year, on the rare occasion I go “out out” or to more formal events.
I like the way they make my legs/bum look on a nice dress and I like the way they seem to improve my posture.
No way could I wear them everyday though! My mum is a hairdresser, and back in the 80’s and 90’s she used to wear pointy-toed stilettos to work every single day without fail. I have no idea how she’s not crippled now.
She’s still working as a hairdresser, but he embraced the “comfy shoes” nowadays

Yes and no.

I wear heels and love them. They make me feel powerful and put together and although I'm a rabid feminist I have no qualms wearing heels.

But in part I think that's because a lot of women like subverting the stereotype and taking control of the negative. May not be a popular idea here, but in some ways I think there are echoes of the way some women have started to own the word "bitch". Yes we know its a negative and yes we're going to turn it on its head and own it.

Deep down, if I'm honest, I think it is based on some antiquated sense that a woman needs to look decorative and sexy and with a subtle implication that looking sexy is a subtle limitation on her freedom to operate.

Like so many symbols in modern life, its complicated and needs a bit of unpicking.

Don't be riduculous it is personal choice FFS!

In what way does society reward females for looking good and following fashion?

I know many successful people who are still wearing clothes from the 80’s and own nothing that has been deemed fashionable for years. Even back in the 80’s 🤣

Or am I misinterpreting what you mean?

subverting the stereotype and taking control of the negative

This with bells on!

I saw a lass on a night out once, in proper sky-scraper heels, running for her taxi, still clutching a glass of wine in one had, a kebab in the other, and still managed to flip the bird to some arsehole who cat-called her from across the street without stumbling or spilling anything.
That takes special skills that men simply do not possess

Heels are less popular now, but some women still enjoy wearing them. As long as they're not being pressurised into wearing them then it's up to them really.
I think the majority of women set our own fashion trends now, rather than be dictated to by designers. Hence why you still see so many women in leggings, flat boots/trainers , and other comfy things, and why cosy pyjamas are probably way more popular than silky lingerie.

Yanbu If you mean slim heels like stilettos rather than wedges or trainers with chunky soles.

Although when it comes to fashion someone really need to have strong words about wearing your pjs around the supermarket, with whatever ‘designer’ considered this.

Those commenting on the discomfort and subservience to men, please read my post regarding my sister who has physical issues and they are a god send

Reward as in praise as the start

A baby wearing pink will have people say " aw, what a beautiful baby". Before that baby can talk it's starting to associate the word beautiful with happy sounding adults, that's training the girl to work on being beautiful. And the they see images of beautiful women, getting oscars or in magazines, all wearing heels and the association Beautiful = good= heels is formed

A baby wearing blue is much more likely to hear " what a strong little boy"

You see it o here...you are much more likely to have a mum complain" my beautiful daughter wants to cut her hair " because being beautiful is considered an important part of being female

But I suspect the subconscious goes a lot further.....at this point I have to say I think the Uk is changing strongly away from heels....but certainly 10 years ago I suspect you would find it easier to get a boyfriend or a job if you wore heels, easier to get promoted. In fact there was a case of dismissal recently that focussed on wearing of heels ( and whilst it is everyone's own choice, no one should be forced to wear things that are known to be harmful)

Just because some people can be successful without conforming does not negate the argument that on average as a whole what happens is that conforming people are more likely to get ahead . And many none conforming successful people conformed before they became successful

Prince certainly never looked weak or tottering in heals.

High heels may be a bad thing, but 95% of the blame for wearing them rests with the wearers. How many women are wearing them because they've been given an order they dare not disobey?

YABU, because it's unlikely that the people forcing heels on themselves think they're making themselves weaker.

I'll tell you what. I usually wear heels for work. I had a meeting in central Paris the day after the Bataclan attacks, and I fucking made sure I wore flats that day. So I could run if I needed to.

As another poster said on here,

"if aliens landed and they saw women (women only), walking around on spikes, they would wonder what the f*ck they were doing.

I agree. I just get highly suspicious of something that is constantly promoted to women, and not to men.

Why aren't men walking around on spikes?

It is changing though. As a teen in 1980s I loved a white stiletto. I work with troubled teens now and whilst some do wear clothes you'd probably prefer your teenage daughter not to, none of them totter on heels. It's trainers or flat boots, even when they're all dressed up.

But today, they are simply decorative and associated with sex work

Yes, by people of below average intelligence