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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask at what age you bought your "forever" home?

183 replies

Daisypop89 · 09/03/2020 09:56

Myself and DP bought our first home last Spring (at 29 years old). We had DD1 already when we bought it and DD2 arrived at the end of last year. The house is a new build in a nice estate, about 30 minutes from my hometown. I just don't know if it's our "forever" home. It's in a nice quiet area, schools etc. all around are lovely.

I'd like to know what age you were when you bought your forever home? Perhaps I just feel we are still so young to be tied to the same property for the rest of our lives, and maybe one day we will want something bigger/better.

OP posts:
ellanwood · 09/03/2020 11:03
  1. It really was our dream home for raising family. But they are almost grown now and we will definitely downsize. If we won the lottery we'd stay put but we need the money that's currently locked into the house for our retirement.
mambanumber5 · 09/03/2020 11:04

I was 33. Big, period, 5 bed detached. I'm happy. My husband however wants to move to the coast so it may not be our forever home after all. But it is a proper family home.

Aebj · 09/03/2020 11:11

I have lived in 11 houses over my lifetime. Being ex forces I’ve also lived on many bases , all lasting 1-2 years.
We brought our current house 10 years ago and I love it here. It will take a lot to move even when I get old ( we have no stairs and a small easy to maintain garden ). I was 35 when I moved here. I live 14,700 km from mine home town now. My boys are settled here

22Giraffes · 09/03/2020 11:14

Mid 30s and don't think I'll ever be in a position to buy any kind of home.

Halloweenbabyy · 09/03/2020 11:14

First home under around 25/26.
Dream home 31.

occulus · 09/03/2020 11:18

I also can't stand the phrase. I think it puts people under unnecessary pressure and financial overstretch. But then I've never been overly into houses themselves, just love having a home where I feel happy and safe and an interesting neighbourhood.

GrumpyHoonMain · 09/03/2020 11:20

No such thing as a forever home, as most people do need to move out of a family home when they get older.

makingmyway10 · 09/03/2020 11:22

we just did, moving in two weeks Smile We are 44.

Jocasta2018 · 09/03/2020 11:22

I live in a 'forever area' not home!
I can walk to shops, GP, Post Office, etc in 5 mins yet the area is quiet. I'm a 25 min walk from the main town & railway station. There are lovely parks within walking distance and the countryside proper is a 25-min drive away.
I might downsize but I really don't want to leave the area!

irregularegular · 09/03/2020 11:23

15 years ago. I was 33. DH was 44. Pre-school age children.

madcatladyforever · 09/03/2020 11:25

i thought I'd bought it at 42, wonderful house in a perfect location then my husband left me and I've had to downsize considerable in a different county.
Looking back at it now I could not have managed the garden for much longer as it was so big and could never have finished all the building work on my own on one salary and the place made me feel sad after he went.
I don't know where or what my forever home is now. one day I hope to be back by the sea somewhere. Maybe in a tiny cottage with a woodburner and not too far from the sjops, I really don't know any more.

KahlanRahl · 09/03/2020 11:31

At age 39. We bought a large bungalow type house which suits a family with one child or a couple. The hall and stairs are large enough to fit a stairlift in if necessary. Downstairs has two extra rooms which easily could be converted to a bedroom and bathroom if need be. It's easy to keep clean and maintain. It has a nice garden with a platform and a patch of grass. Very low maintenance garden. We have our own driveway and a shop nearby. It's lovely here and it feels like a vacation home. We don't ever intend to move. I also couldn't think of a nicer house within our budget.

HavelockVetinari · 09/03/2020 11:40

Bought first flat in London aged 26. Bought our forever home up North aged 32.

Londonmummy66 · 09/03/2020 11:54

31 - been here more than 20 years - bit tight with 2 teenagers but when they move out it will be fine until retirement. We will need to downsize at that point though - and I want to move to the coast.

Grasspigeons · 09/03/2020 12:00

We are in our family home. I hope to finish raising the children here which would be another 10 - 15 years. Then, we will see.

Poptart4 · 09/03/2020 12:02

I was 35, waited 14yrs to finally get our "forever" home. Now we have it, its bitter sweet.

In one sence I hated renting, never knowing where we'd be living from one year to another. Not being able to decorate or put our own stamp on the place.

Now we have our home I love that its ours and we can do as we please. I also love the stability, I know we're lucky as alot if people will never be in this position BUT the thought that this is it forever is abit daunting to me. Like you I feel I'm too young to be in one place forever but realistically I cant see us affording to move again.

OnlyTheLangoftheTitBerg · 09/03/2020 12:05

I’m just grateful I was able to get back on the property ladder in my late 40s. This is not my dream house in terms of location or layout but it’s likely to be the only one I can afford and all being well the mortgage will be paid off before I retire, so I count my blessings that I’m no longer facing an uncertain future in rented accommodation in my 60s.

Lumpjumpbump12 · 09/03/2020 12:11

We were 35 when we bought what we thought was our long term family home, spent a lot of time and money investing into making it somewhere special. 5 years down the line we're planning to move due to noisy neighbour's and be closer to ageing family so I now don't believe in "forever homes"

BroomstickOfLove · 09/03/2020 12:16
  1. When i bought it, I thought of it as a "starter" home, but as house prices rose, we realised that we'd actually bought a gem - a solidly built extendable house with a garden, near outstanding schools, within walking distance of the city centre, major employers, parks and green spaces, with plenty of local community activity, and at a bargain price because it was built as a council house. I can't see us moving any time soon. Friends have moved to bigger houses in the suburbs, but I prefer a smaller, mortgage-free, centrally located home.
RainbowsandSnowdrops · 09/03/2020 12:18

We’re hoping to move next year. I’ll be around 30. That’s when we’ll max out our mortgage and actually work to pay it off. Our current house is a small 3 bed and whilst I love it and will be heartbroken to leave, as we have lovely views. It’s just not big enough especially when DD has friends over or we have another child.

I don’t want to be constantly climbing the ladder to get something bigger. I want it all, nice house, holidays and to retire fairly young. You need to plan well financially to do all those things!

Obviously if we got any inheritance or needed to downsize etc. we may move again.

Sypha · 09/03/2020 12:19

How can you have a forever home when you don't know what life will throw at you? You might need to move for work, expand, downsize, be unable to manage the stairs, be affected by climate change like flooding or subsidence.

We've been here nearly 20 years and I'd hate to move because I've put my heart and soul into building the garden. I love it very much. But circumstances can change and Ican make a new life (and garden) elsewhere if I need to.

Sprigware · 09/03/2020 12:21

'Forever home' is just estate agents marketing speak.

Exactly, like 'superior quality detached executive villa'. It's aural wallpaper designed to make you think you're supposed to have a started home and go on clawing your way up the property ladder to said 'executive villa'.

Plus it sounds like a woodland burial facility.

We've moved around a lot between countries we've just moved again and will probably stay put for a few years this time for DS's schooling's sake. We're in the process of buying a big Regency terraced house, which suits us well for now city centre, close to DS's school, interesting area for the arts -- but will move on again when circumstances change.

Sprigware · 09/03/2020 12:22

'Started home' should have been 'starter home'.

MerryDeath · 09/03/2020 12:30
  1. well, i hope this is a forever home. we have enough space for it to be and we are pouring a lot of blood sweat and tears into it.
bathorshower · 09/03/2020 12:33

A colleague's mum used to live in her 'forever home' - it was where she'd raised her family. But she'd got older, been widowed, could no longer drive. The fantastic family home on the edge of town was now isolated, and she couldn't keep up with the gardening or maintenance.

She was persuaded to move to a flat in the centre of our city - it transformed her life. Everything she needed was 2 minutes walk away; she could get out and do things whenever she liked. She had a new lease of life for several years.

We may need to do the same one day - not being too attached to our current house can only help.