Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is ridiculous

192 replies

Sparkly212 · 06/03/2020 15:47

DS (18) works in retail at the weekends. He has had a hard time since he got This job last summer with his new manager who started a few months ago and another bitchy two faced colleague who thinks she is better than everyone else and who outshines herself to make her look the best.

Anyway, I’ll not get into that, DS has been told by his manager that as soon as a customer enters the shop, he needs to approach the customer and ask them if they’d like any help. AIBU to find this ridiculous?

I know myself that when I go to shops I don’t like the staff annoying me as soon as I come in, I’d expect them to give me a minute or two and if I’m still there and haven’t approached the staff myself, I’d have expected them to ask me if I’m okay and if I need any help.

DS’ manager has told DS that it is unacceptable to leave a customer for a minute or two when they come in as they may feel ignored and then leave. Yes nobody should ignore a customer - but is it really necessary to hassle a customer as soon as they enter? Surely that would piss them off more?

OP posts:
MagnoliaJustice · 06/03/2020 16:50

Your son is an adult and should be handling this situation himself, you're doing him no favours by being so involved. Time to cut the apron strings.

Ninkanink · 06/03/2020 16:51

Yes - i was perfectly able to judge whether someone was just browsing, whether they needed help or advice, or whether or not they might be open to up-selling/cross-selling. None of that made any difference. I still had to do as I was instructed by my manager who in turn was required to adhere to policy and police us in doing it exactly as HO had set out. I and our team of very knowledgeable, capable customer service experts argued quite comprehensively multiple times that what was required of us was actually putting off a sizeable majority of our customers. They didn’t care. They wanted it done their way. And as they were the bosses, we did as we were instructed.

Springpea · 06/03/2020 16:52

If it was a phone shop and I was after a voucher, I would LOVE to get some attention from the staff the second I entered the shop! However, if it's a more browsing-type shop, then absolutely not.

Roselilly36 · 06/03/2020 16:54

My son is also 18 & has a part time retail job, he has to approach customers, it has done him the world of good to be honest, he was extremely shy initially, but he now has the skills to handle situations, their are elements of his job that he isn’t keen on but he does what his boss asks of him.

I wouldn’t dream of ever getting involved with his work, he wouldn’t want me to either. All part of learning, as is working with difficult personalities.

It doesn’t matter whether you want to be approached in a shop or not, if that’s how the store is measured than that’s what needs to happen, if he doesn’t like it then perhaps he should look for a more suitable role elsewhere that doesn’t have this requirement.

ChewChewIsMySpiritAnimal · 06/03/2020 16:59

Have you always mollycoddled him? He needs to do as he's told, he's at work and his manager knows more about retail than your precious little boy.

Bluntness100 · 06/03/2020 17:00

It’s Argos right op? If that’s the case then really they are not going to change company policy because you and your son don’t like it.

Seriously if he wants to get on in this job tell him to do as he’s told. When he’s running the company he can make the policy decisions. Till then he shouldn’t be running to mummy and her supporting him to not do it.

SlightlyJaded · 06/03/2020 17:03

This thread is two different questions with two different answers - that's the problem.

AIBU to think DS should ignore his boss?
Yes, YABU. He is there to do a job and follow instruction.

AIBU to think it's annoying when the sales assistant approaches you immediately.
No, YANBU. It would make me leave.

But question one trumps question two.

BogOffWinter · 06/03/2020 17:04

He either does as he’s told or he loses his job. With regards to the female colleague, are you sure she’s actually like this? Have you asked your son (a man, who’s job is involved) what he wants to do about the situation?

Bluewater1 · 06/03/2020 17:06

I don't like this as a customer either but if the manager says to do it then he must do it. Being back late from lunch is not ok. Even if it's only one minute...

envelopeofpubes · 06/03/2020 17:07

another bitchy two faced colleague who thinks she is better than everyone else and who outshines herself to make her look the best.

Is this sentence supposed to make any sense?

YABU.

pallasathena · 06/03/2020 17:08

You need to calm down OP. And back off.
Your son won't survive in the world of work if you're hovering over him like a demented dragonfly.
Let him find his own way, make his own mistakes, deal with the sort of stuff life throws at you and become a fully fledged, capable, resilient adult in the process.
You need to let go.

Janaih · 06/03/2020 17:08

My dd had a job in retail at college. I think she learned more about life in those 2 years than her entire education.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 06/03/2020 17:09

you have't even met the girl, yet your calling her allsorts, you only have your ds word, for all you know your son is the arsehole,

YABU - its a standard requirment in most customer facing outlets.

nannybeach · 06/03/2020 17:09

Both my daughters are in retail, one is a manager of one of the big supermarkets, the other a very large well known chain is an "expert" and duty manager, she has to greet customers, hello, can I help you, they emply "secret shoppers" and get into trouble if they dont do this, yes, the son is 18 he is an adult!

Sonichu · 06/03/2020 17:10

It's almost like we have to do things we don't want to at work. What a shocking idea.

Ninkanink · 06/03/2020 17:11

I know! The very thought!!

Crinkle77 · 06/03/2020 17:13

@Ninkanink I don't know why they insist on it. Probably faceless executives who've hardly spent any time on the shop floor who think they know best and who refuse to listen to what the staff are telling them. I hate shop greeters even more. Half they time they stand there looking fed up and give you a half hearted 'welcome'. Then when you do ask for help seem totally clueless. All extremely poor customer service but for some reason what they think is best.

Singinghollybob · 06/03/2020 17:14

I dont see it as bullying. He was admittedly a minute late from his break and it was reported. How is that bullying?
He also refuses to adhere to store policy, how is that him being bullied??

Singinghollybob · 06/03/2020 17:15

It doesnt matter that he doesnt agree with it and knows better. His manager pays his wages so he needs to do as he is told or get another job where he agrees with their ethos

Bluntness100 · 06/03/2020 17:15

another bitchy two faced colleague who thinks she is better than everyone else and who outshines herself to make her look the best

As it was your son who was bad mouthing her, calling her a bitch to other staff, she has not done this to him and he’s the one who doesn’t do as told, and is late back from lunch. Do you think maybe she actually is the best?

Maybe her mum encourages her to follow policy and work her hours, not verbally abuse other staff? What do you think?

Candyfloss99 · 06/03/2020 17:17

He needs to tell his manager, "my mummy says I don't have to do that"

giggly · 06/03/2020 17:18

Imagine referring to another women as a bitch on the say so if your 18 year old son. That’s a fine example your setting him and what a shining star of a man your raising.
Everything else is work I’m afraid. Do you not have experience of working with other people op?

TooTrueToBeGood · 06/03/2020 17:20

You are not doing your son any favours. One of the fundamental things people need to learn when entering the workforce is that they will invariably have to do things that they don't particularly agree with. People who really struggle with that invariably don't progress very well and the worst end up unemployable.

Instead of supporting your son in rebelling against his employer's policies you should tell him to get on with it and then keep your nose out. You are treating him like a 12 year old and not the young adult he is meant to be.

Ellisandra · 06/03/2020 17:22

Still trying to work out what outshining oneself is Confused

If you’d just posted that you were annoyed that your son was working with a shitty colleague, I’d have had everything sympathy for him - and for being able to do anything.

But beak out over the customer interactions policy! Not your business.

I don’t care in the slightest, I ever say, “no, I’m fine thanks” and get left alone or I say, “where the hell are all the loo rolls?” Wink and it’s quite helpful.

Do you think retailers are stupid and want to lose customers? Do you not think that they don’t pay plenty of money to retail psychologists and follow developing trends? Not themselves always, but through third party services. Yes, some get annoyed by it. But is be surprised if they hadn’t considered research that said “20% find it annoying, but 98% of the 20% will not stop shopping there. However, of the 40% who said they liked it, 25% said they bought something they otherwise would not have bought.”

When I was his age, I remembered training to switch from, “can I help you?” to “how can I help you?”. It really makes a difference! (well, it did then) The first mostly generated an automatic no. The second drew out more questions.

dustibooks · 06/03/2020 17:23

If there's one thing guaranteed to make me turn straight round and walk right back out again, it is a shop assistant accosting me the second I go into a shop.