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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is ridiculous

192 replies

Sparkly212 · 06/03/2020 15:47

DS (18) works in retail at the weekends. He has had a hard time since he got This job last summer with his new manager who started a few months ago and another bitchy two faced colleague who thinks she is better than everyone else and who outshines herself to make her look the best.

Anyway, I’ll not get into that, DS has been told by his manager that as soon as a customer enters the shop, he needs to approach the customer and ask them if they’d like any help. AIBU to find this ridiculous?

I know myself that when I go to shops I don’t like the staff annoying me as soon as I come in, I’d expect them to give me a minute or two and if I’m still there and haven’t approached the staff myself, I’d have expected them to ask me if I’m okay and if I need any help.

DS’ manager has told DS that it is unacceptable to leave a customer for a minute or two when they come in as they may feel ignored and then leave. Yes nobody should ignore a customer - but is it really necessary to hassle a customer as soon as they enter? Surely that would piss them off more?

OP posts:
MsJaneAusten · 06/03/2020 16:29

Bloody hell. You’re hugely over involved. Your only response should be “I know love, it’s irritating, but if that’s what your boss tells you to do, that’s what you need to do” Hmm

lazylinguist · 06/03/2020 16:29

It doesn't remotely matter whether he thinks (or you think) it's a bad policy. He needs to do as he's told or work somewhere else.

sunnyrainycloudy · 06/03/2020 16:30

It's his job. Tell him to suck it up or leave.

And how is you interfering to this degree helping him learn coping mechanisms for the future?

AnneLovesGilbert · 06/03/2020 16:31

Is this what happens when you don’t start paid work till you’re 18?

When I were young we started weekend or after school jobs at 14 or 15 and had initiative and opinion beaten right out of us long before we reached 18... Grin

NorthEndGal · 06/03/2020 16:31

What did you mean by "she outshines herself"? From your OP? It's a phrase I've not heard before

Wallowinginfilth · 06/03/2020 16:31

msmith501 yes but most retail business are not good employers.

wildcherries · 06/03/2020 16:32

YABU being this involved in his job.

Isthistrueor · 06/03/2020 16:33

I worked in retail years ago when I was a student and it was standard even then, I also hated it but sadly had to suck it up. I hate it as a customer too, it’s partly why I much prefer online shopping.

CheshireSplat · 06/03/2020 16:33

So, in summary, he's not doing what he's being asked to do and he was late back from a break. Okaaaay......YABU

WorraLiberty · 06/03/2020 16:34

His colleague is constantly on his back as though she is the manager and is clearly reporting everything back to the bosses. He was late back from his break by 1 minute recently and his boss knew all about it and she was off on the day in question! So it’s clearly the colleague that is doing this.

She has no right to gossip about him when she has the same job description.

Is this the same colleague your son was gossiping about on Facebook messenger to a new starter? Told the new starter he thinks his colleague is 'a bitch' and then got worried because the new starter is quite close to 'the bitch'?

If so, then Pot - Kettle - Black. I mean massively....

Bluntness100 · 06/03/2020 16:34

Blimey I’m hoping this isn’t real because if it is it is very concerning. Op you should not be this involved in your sons job.

If he sounds off then tell him to do what he’s told and to be back on time from lunch.

Ilovechocolate01 · 06/03/2020 16:34

The reason for the approach within 2 minutes is mystery shoppers - one of the questions is based on this. We used to get £100 bonus for a 100% result, although this was 10 years ago. It's also very common in retail to approach customers quickly. Maybe this isn't the right job for your DS if he's struggling with this? If a manager has asked him to do this it's not unreasonable to expect staff to follow this instruction

Furcoatgirl · 06/03/2020 16:35

I think you're getting some very spiteful replies.

I can totally understand your concern for your son, but, as he's 18 I do think you need to take a step back and let him work this one out for himself. Ultimately, what could you even do?

Personally speaking I despise being pounced upon in shops, makes me feel like I'm being watched and I can't browse in peace.

Ninkanink · 06/03/2020 16:36

Wow you got bonuses?! We got nothing for our (multiple) 100% scores and hassle like you wouldn’t believe for anything less than ‘perfection’ (which quite often was diametrically opposed to what the majority of customers are actually looking for).

wildcherries · 06/03/2020 16:36

Is this the same colleague your son was gossiping about on Facebook messenger to a new starter? Told the new starter he thinks his colleague is 'a bitch' and then got worried because the new starter is quite close to 'the bitch'?

If that's the case: massively unreasonable. What a mess.

OhCaptain · 06/03/2020 16:37

Is this the same colleague your son was gossiping about on Facebook messenger to a new starter? Told the new starter he thinks his colleague is 'a bitch' and then got worried because the new starter is quite close to 'the bitch'?

Hmm. Puts a different spin on someone trying to "outshine" herself!

Oilyoilyoilgob · 06/03/2020 16:38

I’m wincing a bit reading your posts, you’re far too involved! I’m sure you’ll think everyone’s wrong and you’re looking out for your son but you’re really, really not doing him any favours being like this 😬

Even if he’s moaning to you don’t egg him on. You’ll create THAT person at work, the one who thinks jobs are beneath them and who cares if they’re a min or two late back from break!

ShesGotBetteDavisEyes · 06/03/2020 16:38

Unfortunately he has to do as he’s told if he wants to keep his job. Tis the way of the world..

Personally I don’t like being harangued as soon as I walk into a shop - if I want help I’ll ask thanks!

The problem here seems to be that he doesn’t like his manager, is moaning to you about it and you’re getting upset that he’s being ‘picked’ on. He could look for another job?

sunnyrainycloudy · 06/03/2020 16:39

Maybe I'm projecting but my mother was the same with her sons. Got VERY over involved in their jobs, always told them they weren't being treated correctly and got them to question their managers all the time.

Also, any female co-workers were 'bitches'.

Upshot is both brother still living at home in their 30's and can't keep down a job because they argue with their bosses constantly. And have APPALLING views on women.

MysteryShopperHere · 06/03/2020 16:44

Yep, I agree with most of the previous posters. If that’s what his manager tells him to do that’s what he must do.

It’s not a new thing, it was precisely my job when I was a Saturday girl in a posh clothing shop years ago. I didn’t get to sell anything unless all the established staff were busy with other customers - because of commission.

As a Mystery Shopper now it’s one of the specific questions on all the feedback forms I have to fill in. I work for several firms with a variety of types of clients. The question is a variation of whether I had a friendly greeting as soon as I entered the shop.

Tistheseason17 · 06/03/2020 16:45

It's a hard knock life...

Crinkle77 · 06/03/2020 16:46

I hate being approached too. It puts me right off. The art of good customer service is about being able read the customer and knowing when it is appropriate to offer help. You can usually tell when someone is just browsing or if they can't find what they want. As long as there are staff available to assist when I want it then I'm happy.

Aridane · 06/03/2020 16:46

Nothing left to post / everyone’s already said it- best universal

Hugsgalore · 06/03/2020 16:47

Ah would you come on and cop on to yourself

Paperdolly · 06/03/2020 16:47

Someone said earlier “You’re only looking after your son”

No you aren’t! You are damaging his entitlement to grow up. Cut the strings and allow him to stand on his own two feet. He’s going to end up with Victim Mentality otherwise.