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AIBU?

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Original poster

To forgive?

81 replies

sintysalt · 01/03/2020 20:26

I was seeing a guy and he didn't treat me well but we were friends before.
We hung around in a group together (5 girls and 3 boys )
He didn't treat me nice at the end and brought up the fact I only worked part time.
Told me he didn't want to speak to me anymore (after I found out he was texting other women ,confronted him and he got mad at me)
He turned the whole group against me and none of them speak with me now.
3 weeks ago he rang me to tell me he had unblocked me and now we are texting daily.
My friends say I am crazy
Am I ?

OP posts:
HollowTalk · 01/03/2020 22:05

You are behaving like someone who is so desperate for male attention that you will give up all of your self-respect. You know where that ends.

datasgingercatspot · 01/03/2020 22:09

Not crazy, stupid.

edwinbear · 01/03/2020 22:09

OP don’t go there...he’s there for the ego boost, don’t fall for it.

Original poster
sintysalt · 01/03/2020 22:11

I know I'm behaving desperate.
The way he treated me I should have told him to F off.
I'm in my 30s so should probably know better.

OP posts:
n00bMaster69 · 01/03/2020 22:14

You're in your 30's? Shock

Block and forget about him, he's making a fool out of you.

AnyFucker · 01/03/2020 22:17

I would have thought you were 15

mommybear1 · 01/03/2020 22:26

The fact you recognise you should know better tells you all you need to know. You deserve an apology in full AND for him to explain to those who cut you off what happened - and then ditch him. Anyone who can do that to you is not worth your time.

TheBigFatMermaid · 01/03/2020 22:28

Make better friends. Do not make do.

I think after loosing a while friendship group, you are feeling vulnerable. Do t let that make you take shit.

MirandaGoshawk · 01/03/2020 22:37

Have a bit more confidence that you deserve better than this knob. Tell him to get lost.

Original poster
sintysalt · 01/03/2020 22:39

Is there not a chance he realised he behaved terrible?
Or regrets it?
Or am I trying to see the best in him

OP posts:
PrincessSarene · 01/03/2020 22:43

Sorry, I think you’re fooling yourself. If he really had seen the error of his ways he would be full of apologies, trying to make it up to you and finding ways to reassure you it would never happen again.

AnyFucker · 01/03/2020 22:47

You are fooling yourself and letting him humiliate you

gamerchick · 01/03/2020 22:50

Definitely after a shag. He thinks you're a mug OP. You're currently telling him the level of crap you're willing to put up with and still let him back into your underwear.

It's your call.

Samtsirch · 01/03/2020 22:55

Remember the definition of madness...

n00bMaster69 · 01/03/2020 23:03

He's whistled and you've come bounding to him like a dog.

He isn't sorry, he doesn't care about you. You're most likely just an easy shag and ego booster to him.

VetOnCall · 01/03/2020 23:06

There is no best to see in him, he's a douchebag and he's playing you for a fool. Thing is though, you're letting him do it. He has no respect for you and he doesn't 'regret' anything; he's come back to see if you'll accept his shitty behaviour and so far you have. It'll only get worse over time as he knows he can treat you however he wants and you'll let him.

Only you can stop it. You're worth more than being treated like a fool by some disrespectful, chancing little prick. He's a poor excuse of a human being. Find some self respect, and stop engaging with him. Maybe get some counselling for low self esteem/poor boundaries; it will help you.

MarthasGinYard · 01/03/2020 23:10

Ugh

He must get a real kick out of the power you give him.

Why on Earth?

MarthasGinYard · 01/03/2020 23:12

'Is there not a chance he realised he behaved terrible?'

Or perhaps he's desperate for a fuck and thinks you may oblige if he talks you round....

Ellisandra · 01/03/2020 23:15

“his way of saying sorry”

Nah.

His way of putting the feelers out for a fuck?
His way of striking his ego that he can get you to come running?
His way of setting you up to kick you again because he’s a nasty shit?

Any of those are possible. But no, it’s not his way of saying sorry.

For god’s sake block him, and find some way to work through why you’re still prepared to speak to him - counselling?

AtrociousCircumstance · 01/03/2020 23:16

Trying to see the best in him is just fantasising. It’s imaginary, born of pure blind desperate need and projection, and will end up with you being used and hurt again.

You must learn to stand up for yourself, protect yourself, parent yourself. We all have to learn this (if we weren’t fully raised with this ability).

Stop responding to him altogether and look elsewhere for some interaction.

Hannsmum · 01/03/2020 23:19

OP how old are you? You sound very naive. You letting him ride on your emotions and he sees that hes easily having his way with you

EKGEMS · 01/03/2020 23:20

Date him and that makes two losers in the relationship

LemonFrenzy · 01/03/2020 23:32

If you forgive him he won't have any respect for you. You reap what you sow.

Durgasarrow · 02/03/2020 00:02

You know this is a dead end.

TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup · 02/03/2020 00:10

So you hadn't blocked him (if he managed to phone you) despite the shit he'd put you through?

I wouldn't even text him back, just block every number he's contacted you from, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, the lot.

An apology has to contain the words "I'm sorry" and a clear indication that the perpetrator understands what they did and why that was wrong. Calling you up like hey so I've been a bit shit but let's put it behind us is most definitely NOT an apology.

I'm hoping the friends who think you are mad are new ones and not the same shits who so easily turned against you on the say so of a slimeball?

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