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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People using lifts

455 replies

Aquarius1619 · 29/02/2020 18:59

I’m actually a bit annoyed at myself for being petty enough to post this.
But this really got under my skin today!! I have an 11 month old who isn’t keen on the pram, will sit in there for 15 minutes or so but as soon as I stop moving she has a meltdown.
So we were waiting for the lift as we were parked on floor 5 in the local shopping mall today and I was stood behind a queue of people waiting to use the lift. People with no shopping, no kids, just didn’t want to use the stairs. And it took 20 minutes for me to get in the lift because each time it would come to my floor it was full of people with no kids, no wheelchairs, no walking sticks so then we’d wait for the next one then one of the people in front of me with nothing to carry would get in it. I know every disability isn’t visible either but FFS I’m talking a load of people here. By the time some of them had eventually got in the lift it would’ve been quicker for them to have walked up and down the whole place! Meanwhile DD is having a meltdown because we’d been stood around for ages. Is it unreasonable to expect people to just use the stairs and free up the lifts for people who actually need them? If I have no pram with me I always use the stairs

OP posts:
Honorah · 29/02/2020 21:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MorganKitten · 29/02/2020 21:51

Maybe work on the meltdowns not judging other people?

Brefugee · 29/02/2020 21:56

So instead of about 2/3 people having the common decency to get out and walk the (heaven forfend) maximum 5 floors these guys had to abandon that set of lifts and head off to another set across the street.

have a bloody word with yourself. The world doesn't stop just because you had a child.

saraclara · 29/02/2020 21:59

Good grief. Any number of people come on here for a rant about stuff that's just as minor as the OPs without getting crucified for it like this.

OP came on, not to judge individuals (as she says, she doesn't know about hidden conditions) but to moan about the fact that most people won't have needed to use the lift, but did, while she needed to and had to wait.

It doesn't matter how many people come on here and say "but I have (X) condition and you wouldn't know". You all know perfectly well that the majority of people don't have conditions that prevent them using stairs, and had you been the OP today, you'd have been equally pissed off.

I don't know what's the matter with everyone. I never knew that the right to use a lift to go up one or two levels was such an ingrained right.

TreestumpsAndTrampolines · 29/02/2020 22:00

You must have been in a really rude place - anywhere I go people let people with buggies in first.

endofthelinefinally · 29/02/2020 22:07

I look plump and well because I am on loads of drugs, including steroids. I can't manage stairs because my legs usually stop working about halfway.
DH is well, but he has to stay with me in case I fall over.
I had a walking stick until recently, but I am working on managing without it.

Original poster
Aquarius1619 · 29/02/2020 22:12

@Honorah incorrect.
I lose interest when people repeatedly ignore what I’m saying and make out I have an issue with people who need to use a lift - using a lift! Totally not what I’m saying and I think that’s pretty obvious. Happy to take on board viewpoints but it’s clear to see when people just want to insist I’m being judgemental towards disabled people when I’ve clearly said quote the contrary. It’s a parenting forum so it’s very surprising to see people thinking having a pram or running an errand with a child is unreasonable. There’s a difference between being constructive and just being a nob

OP posts:
Falcor40 · 29/02/2020 22:13

@KatherineJaneway

She couldn’t get in the lift though...

chinateapot · 29/02/2020 22:16

I’d be surprised if lots of people who were totally able to use the stairs were waiting 20 minutes for the lift. I suspect there are more people with hidden disabilities than you realise. My daughter has neuropathy post chemo. Right now you’d know because she’s got no hair but in about 6 months time she’ll look like a healthy 7 year old.

trixiebelden77 · 29/02/2020 22:17

I use the stairs most of the time. Sometimes I don’t if it’s been a long day/ post night shift.

If you, hand on heart, never once used a lift until you had a child.....that’s quite unusual.

BumbleBeee69 · 29/02/2020 22:20

I genuinely don't understand why posters are explaining themselves and their disabilities and reasons for using the lifts... EVERYBODY is entitled to use the lifts.. stop explaining yourselves... 😊

crazycatgal · 29/02/2020 22:30

YABU, you need to wait in the queue like everyone else. I would personally let somebody with poor mobility/ in a wheelchair in front of me in the queue but you're not any more entitled to use the lift than me.

Tinyhumansurvivalist · 29/02/2020 22:35

Yabvu. I have arthritis and chronic asthma, walking up or down 5 flights of stairs would see my having a massive attack and probably have to be brought down by paramedics.

You do understand that not all disability is viable right?

Winterwoollies · 29/02/2020 22:49

They were there before you. They get to use the loft first. Having a child in a pram doesn’t make you more important. Whether they have a knee injury, heavy shopping or just didn’t want to use the stairs, it’s none of your business. They beat you to the lift, you have to wait.

Halloweenbabyy · 29/02/2020 23:02

I have scoliosis so I often use the lift. I get some awful looks, people actually are the worst.

Schuyler · 29/02/2020 23:27

You had to wait your turn on a busy weekend, rainy day. Shit happens. People shouldn’t push in but equally, you don’t have a right over them if they were there first, purely because you have a child.

If your baby dislikes the pram so much that she is distressed, why don’t you try something like a sling?

redwinefine · 29/02/2020 23:29

If I want to use the lift. I will use the lift. TBH, sometimes it's a pain in the arse to use the lift so if someone's using it, maybe think that they have a reason they're not going to tell you about. Get over it.

saraclara · 29/02/2020 23:32

If there's limited access to anything, then those who have other options are in a position to let those who don't, have priority. It seems that fewer of us do that than I'd have liked to think.

I'm honestly really surprised at this thread. Especially, as OP has said, since this is a mum's forum and most of us have had to navigate buggies around places with several floors in the past.

Moominmammaatsea · 29/02/2020 23:41

The responses here confirm (for me) why as a nation we are so fat and unfit.

OhWellThatsJustGreat · 29/02/2020 23:41

You actually managed to get a parking space you could manage a pram out of your car in? I've never been able to get a parent and child space in our town centre.

Sorry, I'm with that majority here, it's frustrating, but they've as much right as you so your initial "being petty" is probably right.

WalkingDeadTrainee · 29/02/2020 23:45

I am going to fully admit that there is no way in hell I would climb 5 stories in a mall. I would wait for that lift. I am not disabled.

PervyMuskrat · 29/02/2020 23:48

Waves at Cora and Happen - also a vertigo sufferer (although now finally signed off by the hospital after 4 years) and cant do escalators. I thought it was just me!

KatherineJaneway · 29/02/2020 23:50

@Falcor40

Couldn't get in the lift to up 5 floors. Didn't say anything about there possibly being a basement she could travel down to. Sometimes you have to go down a floor or back a station to secure a place.

PickAChew · 29/02/2020 23:57

My autistic but very normal looking 16yo can't use escalators and tires on lots of stairs, so we use the lift, even when the lift is, frankly, a PITA.

PickAChew · 29/02/2020 23:58

In the meantime, you can carry a 11mo and a folded buggy on the escalator.