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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Really in a quandry

28 replies

planetcloud · 29/02/2020 07:50

I just don't know if doing enough with my life. I work a 60 hour week, although I do still find time to be on the PTA, bake for bake sales, do the kids' homework with them, attend all their recitals etc. I run them to after school piano, violin, cello, ballet, ruggers etc but I somehow feel inadequate. I'm trying to save the environment so I ask for my Waitrose shop to be delivered without bags, I only go two long haul holidays a year to save my carbon footprint and I try and get the nanny to drop my DCs off to school in her micro mini to save the environment - only bring out the Range Rover when absolutely necessary. I also give to foodbanks - only last week I put in a couple of tins of spinach and some salmon pate that had been in a Christmas hamper, but am I doing enough?

OP posts:
LangittleClegabbage · 29/02/2020 07:52
Grin
Atalune · 29/02/2020 07:55

When you fly long haul wear organic cotton clothing from a Sustainable source and eat 6 lentils for every time zone flown through.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 29/02/2020 07:57

But what are little Tarquinn and Farquhar doing to save the planet? Rallies, protests etc? And are you vegan?

BarbRoyle · 29/02/2020 08:02

Guessing this is a journalist ?

TitianaTitsling · 29/02/2020 08:05

You should stop using that time as a holiday and go and do some 'good work' of course.... It's like really selfish of you to take holiday time when other people can't.... Wink Grin

TrickyD · 29/02/2020 08:13

You are clearly far too busy to find out how to spell “quandary”.

Cheermeupplease22 · 29/02/2020 08:18

Phew you had me going until the part about the nanny.

Parts of London are full of people like that - it’s why I like my partly skanky partly nice bit, impossible to be snobbish round here as you would be looked at like this 🙄🤨.

planetcloud · 29/02/2020 08:18

TitianaTitsling I do try and do charitable endeavours, however, I do find that poor people find me patronising - I have no idea why at all. I actually commented that I liked the girl in the charity shop's earrings when I handed in my old designer clothes but she didn't even say than you. I don't know if it is my designer clothing that put people off (which I only buy on sale by the way from a reputable retailer using recycled material). I would buy cheaper clothes but they are made in sweat shops and I really am trying to do my bit. Anyway unfortunately I have to look a certain way for my £100k plus job - it's just so unfair.

OP posts:
planetcloud · 29/02/2020 08:21

TrickyD damn, one will be having a word with one's Secretary - I mean one doesn't exactly type these posts. I am dictating them whilst watching Jeremiah play ruggers! That girl is in for a stern warning.

OP posts:
TheQueef · 29/02/2020 08:23

Some crackers for the food bank should square it.

Isleepinahedgefund · 29/02/2020 08:23

This is just heartbreaking.

What does your therapist say?

ArthurShelbysTash · 29/02/2020 08:26

Maybe a sponsored walk up Kilimanjaro would help?

planetcloud · 29/02/2020 08:30

Isleepinahedgefund thank you so much for asking. She actually thinks I am too hard on myself but you now, it's what one does. As a mother guilt is never too far from your door anyway. One will just have to grin and bear it.

OP posts:
BudgieHammockBananaSmuggler · 29/02/2020 08:30

Reverse snobbery?

planetcloud · 29/02/2020 08:31

ArthurShelbysTash have thought about that but they wouldn't let me take my assistant or wear my Le Chameau wellingtons - I mean for goodness sake, one has standards.

OP posts:
PlomBear · 29/02/2020 08:35

I’m guessing you actually live in a council house and work in Wilko on the till.

planetcloud · 29/02/2020 08:55

BarbRoyle For your information I invented a toothpick made from recycled and sustainable resources - I now have turnover of over a million a year - the idea was completely poo pooed on Dragon's Den but I proved them wrong.

OP posts:
planetcloud · 29/02/2020 08:57

PlomBear Council House? Do you mean a house which is technically owned by the state like Buck House? Wilko? Is that a country in Africa? Sorry I haven't heard of it. I thought till was something to do with soil.

OP posts:
Apolloanddaphne · 29/02/2020 08:59
Smile
ChazP · 29/02/2020 09:03

Time for a sabbatical, I think.
Take the kids out of school for 6 months (check if the school will discount the fees), and go set up a new school/orphanage somewhere deserving; preferably somewhere with a glamping option.
Make sure the nanny comes too, and be sure to Instagram the experience.

Isleepinahedgefund · 29/02/2020 19:32

Yes - what you really need to do here is FIND yourself.

MrsMoastyToasty · 29/02/2020 19:37

YABU. You do realise that food banks are in dire need of quail's eggs and caviar, don't you?

PurpleCrazyHorse · 29/02/2020 19:41

If you're not a no plastic, organic vegan, then you're not doing enough. Shame on you OP Grin

And are you off-setting your carbon?

TrainspottingWelsh · 29/02/2020 20:10

Don't donate naice food, poor people won't know what to do with it. It's ok to relax your principles and donate value chips. Whenever I drive past a fast food establishment there are always people with chips so they must really like them, otherwise they'd dine at a restaurant.

You should definitely kit yourself out in brand new shiny Barbour and take the dc out for a day in the countryside. As you'll look the part nobody will mind if you trespass, just loudly haw about how quaint everything is. As a result, you, and your dc will know everything about farming and nature which can only add authenticity next time you are imparting your extensive knowledge of the environment.

Lipz · 29/02/2020 20:24

I think you could do more, that's not a lot of things. Can your children not do more activities ? They seem to be doing very little, I'm sure you could squeeze in a bit of fencing, or some polo ? Mine do yachting, they thoroughly enjoy this.

Well done on cutting down the long haul holidays, I wouldn't be able to survive on just two per year. You must feel like a pauper. There's not a chance I'd be disclosing that to anyone I knew, they would probably set up a go fund me page or similar.

You actually went into a charity shop Blush I hope you wore a disguise. I would imagine the non thank you woman was just jealous of you.