“Priority debts”

[PumpkinP]

I’m really at a loss with child maintenance and feel like I’m banging my head against a wall! My ex hasn’t paid maintenance in 3 years. I’ve been to the cms but can’t get anywhere. I have 4 children and I don’t get a penny from the father. I have just called cms as they told me they would do a liability order 6+ months ago. As I hadn’t heard anything I thought I would chase it up. Well according to them because he is on benefits and has “priority debts” he doesn’t have to pay cm. people on here seem to think that if you are not receiving maintenance it’s because you are not doing enough to chase it but I have tried for years. And because my ex has other debts he doesn’t have to pay maintenance! How is that right?!

Oh @PumpkinP, what a shit situation. Sorry you are going through this 💐 Must be the most frustrating thing in the world to be told that paying towards his own children isn't considered a "priority".

It’s bollocks isn’t it.
If you didn’t buy your kids food, clothes, heat the house etc social services would quite rightly be on your arse and potentially charged with neglect.
Yet it’s ok for him?

I’m so sorry. the system is bollocks

The thing is he was always in rent arrears from what I remember so surely that will mean that he never has to pay as they will always take priority. How easy it is to get out of paying child maintenance!

So apparently UC can only take off 30% at at time. He was always behind with his rent so then he doesn’t have to pay at all. And doesn’t have to ever as surely he can just make sure he is always behind on his rent. People don’t realise how easy it is to avoid maintenance. I can’t believe I’m suppose to just accept that, but obviously I have to as there are now consequences.

It's absolutely ridiculous and the only ones who suffer are the children. Some parents are a waste of space. 💐

Paying for your children should be the most priority payment. Absolutely crazy that it’s not.

System is crazy

I can't believe children arent considered a priority in terms if his debts. Of course you're not guilty of failing to chase up op!

Apparently cms is ranked around 14th on the list and any other debts they have are above that so think rent arrears, council tax, advances on UC. Like I said he was always but in debt so will never get anyway. Seriously I should just close it now, I admit defeat.

I would write to your MP. I wasn’t aware of this until I read this post. Most people probably don’t realise, MPs included.

Shocking! This should be the top priority!

Should be like the US and they can go to prison for non payment. And I never normally say anything should be like the US!

That’s the thing I don’t think many people are aware at all. I’m sick of hearing “just go to cms” people seem
To think that’s the solution for non paying parents. But they don’t realise that some people just can’t get any maintenance no matter how hard they try, as all their ex does is duck and dive and avoid it at all costs. it’s UC that refuse to send the payments as like I said they will only take 30% off at a time.

How can child maintenance not be a priority? So because he has decided to be reckless and run up debt his kids have to suffer? I’m sure ex is now aware he doesn’t have to pay maintenance if he has arrears so will keep himself in arrears to avoid maintenance. He’s always told me I will never get a penny from him.

Child maintenance is classed as a priority debt OP, as it can be enforced with a liability order and bailiffs. Ultimately he could also be sent to prison for paying, though I don’t think that happens very often.

And rent arrears are not taken out of UC, he must have other debts that are being deducted at source (could be anything like utility debts or court fines).

for not paying

A list of the debts that are more priority than child maintenance if anyone is interested

Well he hasn’t paid for 3 years and they’ve done nothing so it clearly isn’t a priority.

I’m sorry OP, that’s shit

It’s really is shit . Child maintenance have told me themselves that they can no longer do the liability order as he is claiming benefits and all they can do now is continue to attempt to get a payment. At least when I thought they might do a liability order I had some hope. I don’t know what arrears my ex has as they couldn’t tell me that due to data protection. I can only guess.

the only ones who suffer are the children

As a former single parent of three receiving no/low maintenance this isn’t true. It can also affect the RP in a great many ways unless they’re a particularly high earner.

I was going to suggest maybe setting up a petition
on the government website, but just looked online and it seems many petitions on CMS are started by men about how unfair the system is because mothers are too grabby!

Some gems...

petition.parliament.uk/petitions?q=Child+maintenance+

Main parents household income to be calculated and used for child maintenance

"Aims to stop the main parent from using their child as a monetary weapon, as seen in many cases.
There are too many cases where, for example, the mother is living a more luxurious lifestyle and does not need extra monetary support for the child. But still claims from the father who is struggling"

Require child maintenance to be set as at flat rate per child per month.

Why should child maintenance payments increase because of higher earnings? A flat fee would encourage continuity for paying and receiving parents and make the whole system much fairer. It would create equality between parents

Reduce child support/child maintenance service rates

People can suffer financial hardships due to overwhelming rates of CSA or CMS and are unable to move on in life.

"Child benefit is capped weekly at £20.70 for the first child, £17 approx for 2nd child. This should be the basis for CSA/CMS too.
In some cases, there can currently be in excess of £400 monthly for two children compared to £148 approx monthly the government pay a family child benefit for two children. People can be forced into poverty or hardship through CSA or CMS due to the impossibility of living off what they have left."

And my personal favourite...

Child Maintenance to be paid to receiving parent in vouchers for food/clothes.

"Currently a parent will pay the ex spouse an amount of money calculated by Child Maintenance Service (CMS). This money goes directly into the account of the parent with primary care. Unfortunately this results in money being spent on alcohol, cigarettes, tattoos and not on the children." Yep, bloomin' mothers! I bet that's what you're really after isn't it @PumpkinP? Who needs food, gas, electricity, water etc when you could just get another tattoo!

@daftodil that made me laugh. The old gem of 'I'm not paying because I don't know where it's going'. Are your kids fed, clothed, housed? There's your moneys worth then.

@DessertQueen I get the sentiment on that the RP (which I currently am), struggles to provide, has the worry, stress etc.. But ultimately its the children who go without /miss opportunities. The money isn't for us, it's for them.

Does this mean that someone could deliberately over spend, get into debt, then not have to pay cm?

Daftodil that’s incredible! The hoops of logic some men will jump through to justify themselves!

WhyCantIThinkOfAGoodOne yes apparently it does!