To stop DH teaching DS about countries/the world?

[NewNameEveryWeek]

DS is 16 months old. He seems pretty bright for his age (he can say 20+ words already) but DH seems to think that DS is a genius.

We've already had arguments because DH was trying to teach DS colours at 14 months old. DH would ask DS to bring him something red, and DS would usually look confused and fail, or sometimes randomly choose something that happened to be red and DH would take this as conclusive proof that DS knows colours now. It was frustrating to watch as DS looked so bewildered most of the time. I actually thought the way DH was going about it could be bad for DS's development, eg DS can understand what a dog is and will point them out and say "dog" and trying to get DS to associate brown dogs with the word "brown" as well as "dog" is a bit much at this stage if that makes sense.

Now DH is asking me to look for a globe or atlas for DS. He wants to teach him to eg point at Australia when DH asks him to. I haven't bought one yet as I think it's a pointless thing to teach DS at his age. With enough practice he probably could learn to point at the different counties/continents but it won't mean anything to him and he's be better off learning useful easy words first.

AIBU to tell DH we're not buying a globe?

Or should I just let him get on with it? He seems to want me to buy the globe though as he expects me to do all the shopping which is frustrating. I suppose it won't be as bad as the whole colours fiasco anyway.

As long as he's not losing his temper your DH is doing good. Studies have shown that baibies that do learning activities early in development and are stimulated tend to remain active learners for life. Baby may appear to not be deriving any benefit but he definitely is. As babies grow there is a tremendous amount of synaptic pruning that takes place. In other words your babies brain is very plastic and also unfortunately very efficient and if you dont use it, you lose it.

Regarding colours for example: most people know green, blue etc. But have you ever met someone with no colour blindness who struggles to tell the difference between a deep indigo or navy and a black pair of trousers or something? Or a red and a burgundy or magenta?

If we are not adequately stimulated at a young age we can lose the ability to finely discriminate between shades of colour. We can lose the ability to discern certain phonetic sounds in other languages. The ability to pick out a musical scales can be not noticed etc etc.

So do as many activities as possible. As long as there are no emotional detrimental effects I don't see the problem.

What harm does it do? You’re being ridiculous

DS looked so bewildered most of the time

I think that's pretty standard TBH.

We don't lose that ability at age 16 months because we didn't repeat back abstract semantic units in response to abstract shapes on a toy, though, CatherineofAragon. I agree learning is at its most intense in the early years, but at this age, surely, it needs to be about self-directed (guided/supported by parents/carers) discovery?

If a child of that age enjoyed looking at an atlas and spent a lot of time looking at one particular page, you might say 'oh, that's Australia' (or whatever). Just like you might say 'let's play with the red ball today'. But teaching what are essentially party tricks, at 16 months?

(Much in the vein of the dictator-naming toddler above, my dh taught all three of ours to say 'infinitesimal calculus' before they were 2 No genius mathematicians in the making here, I'm afraid).

I think your placing the emotions you feel over the situation onto your toddler.

If he don't want to do it your Husband would know.

You're making something very simple very difficult.

It does sound a bit much and a bit pointless as there are better things to teach him at that age. However if he insists on maybe get him a large flood puzzle with a world map. You can get them in big pieces and if means ds is learning to put puzzles together which helps his fine motor skills.

The benefit that your DS will derive from an adult chatting to him, looking at a book together and generally taking an interest will be very beneficial IMO. I agree, they learn about lots of stuff this way. Don't people chat to babies any more? I remember being amazed at my 2 year old reciting his times tables because he'd been listening to older brother practicing them. He hadn't got a clue what they meant but that is how the brain develops I thought, new connections being made.

I'd have thought lots of children learn colours by an adult asking them to point at/get the red one, sometimes they will accidentally get it right, get lots of praise and gradually they will connect it and "know" it.

Unless he is actually distressing your son let him parent his way.

Reputable toy manufacturers put age appropriate suggestions on their toys. They are generally really useful.

Can you ask your DH to some research into what kind of toys and learning aids are appropriate for different age groups ?

Seeing that he is evidently clueless...

He needs to take a chill pill! My DS knew hundreds of words at that age, he was and is very articulate but he ain't no genius. I guess your DH can do what he wants at home, but make sure he's not running around telling everyone how bright and special your DS is, because he'll look like a twat. EVERYONE's DC are special.
My only concern if I were you would be if he continues like this when the kid is older and pressurises him into performing, learning stuff by rote ( check out some of the crazed parents on Child Genius as a warning) as that could really put him off learning.

people are so extra on this site, bit confused what the dh is doing wrong here. would rather a dad who wanted to be so involved in his kids life than one like mine and others I know who never bothered at all

You and your DH are missing a trick here - I remember the fun I had teaching DD the names of famous dictators. There’s something really hilarious seeing a toddler say Mobutu Sese Seko, Muammar Gaddafi and Idi Amin Dada. This reminded me of DD when she was nearly 3, it was the run up to a general election so lots of political stuff on the TV, papers etc. Waiting in the queue at WHSmiths one day and near the till they had political books, DD pointed to one and said, "That is Maggie Thatcher" then another and "That is Tony Blair" and then with great enthusiasm as he was her favourite, "and this is Paddy Ashdown." Followed by a kiss blown to Paddy. The queue were in stitches.

To be clear I don't think they were dictators just political link.

On another note, I'd tell him to source his own bloody globe!

We had an inflatable beach ball type globe when dd was a toddler,
About £3 from amazon.
I remember watching finding nemo and drawing the east Australian current on it.
Didn’t make her a genius, but didn’t stunt her either.

There are some beautiful colourful books you can get which show areas of the world with illustrations of foods, landmarks etc associated with each country. Maybe something like that would be more fun for your child?

I agree with pps, he's not a performing seal. I suspect dh wants to teach him "tricks" like naming countries to impress other people? Performance parent alert.

He's 16 months for God's sake and can barely speak. I mean you can teach small children by rote, going over and over the same words but it has no bearing on future intellect.

Compromise by buying him an inflatable plastic globe? At least the poor child can have some fun with that!

My SIL was convinced that her first born son was a genius. He was the smartest kid ever.

Guess who turned out to have a rather average intelligence?

I had one male friend message me as he wanted a recommendation of a book to teach his child English, his child wasn't even born at that stage

The Very Hungry Caterpillar is brilliant for that. Really, if you are going to try to teach a foreign language it's really good to use little books right from the start in both languages - the VHC covers days, counting fruit, other things and it is great because they can stick their fat little fingers in the holes.

Eric Carle (the writer) has done loads of those little books and they really are good. But in general books that teach little children to read in their own language are good for teaching them a second. (of course, that will then depend on the parent's skill at pronunciation)

misses point of thread

Colours at 14 months isn't too bad is it?! We had loads of colour themed baby books.

Apart from asking you to get the globe, what's the harm? DD1 learned all her letters and numbers from watching Countdown. I was pg with DD2 and we used to watch it together after work/nursery so I could have a cuppa and put my feet up. My dad was staying and noticed how she knew the first letter of her name, then drew some out and she knew them all. He made her a little dictionary with words she knew in it which she loved. She's now a 3rd year student at Cambridge!

However, I remember having to dash to MiL's to borrow her globe to convince DD that skunks lived in America and couldn't swim the Atlantic Ocean after DD was traumatised watching Clifford the Big Red Dog....

Let your DH buy the globe and crack on. Don't buy it for him though!

YABU, he is teaching his son, his way. You have no right to interfere, as he doesn't when you teach your shared son as you wish.
So many fathers aren't involved at all, get a grip.

I dont see any harm with this really. All learning is good ,and a globe can be used for a long time .I would buy the Globe and have an hour with the paper or Mumsnet (LOL ,Could keep us all updated with their progress)!Colours are a good thing to start with as well .All learning and taking an interest from an early age will be benefical to DS anyway .Judging from some of the complete idiots that pose as husbands on here, DH sounds great to me !

Have you watched the new Netflix series called Babies by any chance? There’s a family on there that remind me of your DH, they started pushing their son pretty much from the womb. They thought it made them fantastic parents with a budding genius on their hands but I just think they came across as pushy egotistical dickheads tbh! They’re an Australian couple living in London, the baby has a ridiculous name.

Babies love people talking and interacting with them, it doesn’t matter if he is talking gobbledygook or countries, let him get on with it.

I honestly feel like I'm in the twilight zone. can someone please tell me what is wrong with saying and pointing out colours? and what is wrong with a globe? it's a sphere that spins which even if the child doesn't learn countries right now I can think of far worse stuff.

only thing I can think would be an issue is if he was getting cross that ds wasn't getting things "right" but other than that I'm very confused