What don't you miss as your children grow older?

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

Saw the horrific words
World book day
On a thread earlier, bought me out in a cold sweat
People often talk about what they miss as their children grow up but as a parent of teens and adults I do not miss
Potty training
Weaning
World book day
PTA events
Broken sleep
Anyone else have things they don't miss 😂

Great thread.

I'm not nostalgic for the old days. My self contained medium sized people can get dressed, make sandwiches, do their own bath, brush teeth, have an interesting conversation, read, go to parties without me hating life waiting with them for 2 hours,etc.

I will especially not miss leaving for work at 7am in the car, having got myself up before 6 after a broken night's sleep and my baby and toddler up at 6.30, sitting traffic, scrabbling to get a parking space at nursery then hanging around waiting for nursery to open (if I didn't leave at 7 the traffic would be 100 times worse.) Making small talk whilst waiting outside in the dark and cold for the door to open at, supposedly 7.45am. Then watching very very slow toddlers climb the stairs to the breakfast club whilst I was twitching behind them panicking about how little time I had to get ready for my teaching day ahead whilst everyone congratulated them on how big they were in sing song voices. Roaring to work to arrive at 7.50am ready for a stressful 10 hour day of teaching and meetings only to sit in traffic for an hour on the way home, with children asleep in the back, working out how I'd get them both to bed on my own (if DH was working away), make dinner and start on my evening planning and marking.

It. Was. Crap.

My life is so much easier now I work very locally to home and my children are massively more independent.

Preschool playgroups and softball parks...a dumping bear pit for feral kids and their equally feral parents to start fights in an instant.
Nappies, breast feeding, baby wipes, vomit and all that stuff from the early years.
Sleep deprivation from restless baby.
Party invites from school mates to leisure centres, MacDonalds and such like. Unclogging the hoover of the tatty plastic toys given out on mass at these events.
Many CBeebies presenters and actors/ actresses including Mr Tumble, Katie the cook and Mister Maker. Also, Sesame street, Barney the annoying dinosaur and any kids show where the presenters spontaneously burst into song, and are sickeningly happy.

Broken sleep
CBeebies (although I do miss Peppa)
Soft play
Lack of ability to be reasoned with - although this returns intermittently
Prising feet in and out of shoes

I love having teens 😀

Swimming lessons
Having to do up car seats and seat belts
Trying to make them do something, anything, quickly
Trying to explain where being kind stops and standing up for yourself begins and sifting the actual facts from 'x was mean to me'
Explaining how to tie shoelaces
Snotty noses in close proximity
Trying to think of healthy family meals which won't be rejected by someone or other
That wordless whine that doesn't have any words in it to assist with what the problem might actually be

My youngest is 4 and about to start school I'm an absolute mess I miss every single shitty and tiering thing each one did when small even the nappies I hate with a passion the school run but I'm sure when it's over I will miss it

World book day.

Whatever onsie my son got for Christmas,well,that's what I got him to wear,whether it was a zebra or bear.

In year 6 he decided he hated it too and went in school uniform,saying it was silly.

Swimming lessons and making small talk with other parents who you'd usually not chat to.

Making lunch boxes is top of my list.

I'm 49 & husband is 50.
Our kids are 28, 22 and 19.
So, the raising of children was a long time ago for us...however...
28-year-old and his partner have made terrible choices and for the past seven months, we have had temporary custody of our three grandchildren who are seven and three-year-old twins. Child rearing has come screaming back to us!

I have NOT missed:

Early starts (6am) and early bedtimes (6:45pm) where I'm stuck at home for the remainder of the evening

I got a letter from the school nurse and with inspection found nits and it's time to boil everything and de-louse

The constant demands for money and time for the seven-year-olds class and the dress up themes

The cliques at the school gates and the competitiveness of school mums

Potty training

Always having to be clearing up and watching those kids closely and being a step ahead of them as it's exhausting

A few years ago, my sister said that she missed her adult children being young and asked me if I missed my children being young too. At the time I said, I wasn't sure. Now, I can answer with complete honesty and certainty that I haven't missed them being young at all! Lol

I can't think of anything really though I don't spend my time missing things and accept the grown up child perfectly well. I wasn't involved in any PTA except for donating things and never went to swimming lessons as they were done at school in school time.

I suppose fun and funny things like concerts in the back garden, parties at home and some things about which mine was enthusiastic.

Having to take them with you to just pop out of the house for two minutes (we can now leave them in the house together for an hour or so during the day if needs be)

^^ This. Not up to an hour more like 20 minutes with youngest but it makes such a difference to me at least.

Not having to do their packing.

I might check and do a check list but on the whole they are pretty independent packers - so pre-hoilday and trips away are much less stressful for me.

Justin Fletcher

Other school mums, especially when they all fall out and you can cut the atmosphere at the school gates,... just ridiculous

Public parks.. The hours spent stood aimlessly while they play on the climbing equipment.. So boring

World Book Day... like we really need the extra stress, thanks

But the very worst... Looking after young children when you're feeling ill and you just need to lie down.. it's the pits

I

I don’t miss:
Nit letters
Constant

But the very worst... Looking after young children when you're feeling ill and you just need to lie down.. it's the pits

Oh yes - I'd forgotten that one.

It was such a shock to me somehow as well it also combined with most illness I've ever had and I also developed an underlying condition which took time to get diagnosedand under control - now it is it rearly bothers me but before was often debilitating in conjuction with other minor illnesses.

All of the above.

Mine now 11 and 13. We can have trips out that are genuinely enjoyable. We had a fab day shopping in thrift shops and eating waffles in cafes. No more soft play. There is light at the end of the tunnel...

Dh and I once so Ill with proper flu we rang my uncle who then looked after dd1 then aged 1 for a whole week! We literally couldn’t do it.

Stairgates

Sterilising things

Bloody phone wouldn’t post when I had finished. Was going to say:
Constant demands from school for money
Never being able to arrange my weekends because of all the activities, lifts, homework deadlines and parties

My youngest is only 5 but I already feel like it's a whole new beautiful world....

No buggies, changing bags, endless packing of spare clothes, nappies, snacks etc. This my biggest one. With a 5 year gap it feels like we were doing this FOREVER.

Whole night sleep. Reliably.

And things I'm looking forward to:

being able to leave the house to do a quick chore without having to figure out who will watch kids or take them with me. Dog walking will be SOOO much easier once they're bigger.

Not having the constant, endless thinking work of what to prepare for meals, pack in lunch boxes etc.

Overseeing homework, craft projects etc. We sent both DC to nursery simply because we hate that kind of stuff and there they could do it to their heart's content.

Having to deal with other mums you wouldn't have to deal with in non-parent life.

This. Playground politics....Office politics much easier.

I also don't miss the sleepless nights or bum-wiping. Or having to think of things for them to do all the time.

(I do miss them holding my hand, though. )

Mine are still small, but I will NOT miss them constantly following me round the house and being under my feet everywhere I step, or the constant "look at me, Mummy!!".

Nor will I miss the faff of leaving the house.

And I'm definitely ready for them to stop bloody bickering!

Sleep deprivation. Bloody unspeakably. (in fairness I have a healthy child with severe obstructive sleep apnoea so it was Horrific and I don't say that lightly)
Birthday parties
Not being able to leave the house for 5 mins.
Colds and the 2 week horror of them.
The boredom of parks with climbing equipment

It was a slog.

Having said that I adored my toddlers and had almost endless patience with them. I adored my breastfeeding years where I could fix almost anything with a slug from a boob. So easy. Now they're 14 and 12 and it's not so easy to fix things. And they are now very expensive. I have had to lose my Zara habit. And I pretty much live in the car now - I'm constantly dropping and picking up.

Genuine question: what's wrong with soft play? When mine were little it seemed to be the only time they were happy, satisfied, doing something that was good for them (exercise) and not demanding attention. Why don't other people like it?

Mum, muuum, muuuuuuum. Yelled at ever increasing volume and urgency.

Postman fucking Pat. It’s hardly surprising that first class is now 76p when that fucker delivers things by helicopter.

And now one of my great pleasures in life is strolling round Hobbycraft idly thinking about my next project instead of charging round in the last 10 minutes before it closes looking for some specific, essential yet unobtainable bit of tat that DS has just mentioned instead of telling two weeks ago when his teacher first told him. FFS!

What was wrong with soft play-

Lots smelt of feet.
Some were a bit sticky and germy.
Not knowing what lurked at the bottom of the ball pit.
Horrible drinks and food.
Having to go into the soft play myself and retrieve my DC, or prevent them getting bashed by a child that was too old to be in there with them.
Parents too busy chatting to keep an eye on their children.