Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you believe in Heaven ?

307 replies

Sunbliss · 16/02/2020 19:51

Just that. Do you believe in Heaven? If so what do you think it’s like. Im not religious but do believe there is a Heaven or would like to believe there some place we will see loved ones again and find peace ourselves.

OP posts:
1066vegan · 19/02/2020 10:52

@SirChing I think that if you are talking directly to somebody who is bereaved, whether you are talking to them in person or online, then there is a moral obligation to be sensitive to their feelings. If you are posting in a forum such as bereavement or miscarriage/pregnancy loss then you should also pick your words carefully.

But this thread has been started in AIBU. If a poster on this thread writes of their terrible loss and says that faith has helped them to cope, then it would be rude and cruel to reply specifically to that post, directly dismiss that poster's faith and ridicule their irrationality. But that is different from expressing a general opinion that belief in an afterlife is irrational and ridiculous. I think that we should be able to adhere to the spirit of AIBU and express our varied opinions as forthrightly as we do about any other topic.

Lofari · 19/02/2020 10:55

I want to believe. My son has a terminal illness. I have to believe there is somewhere amazing for him after this.

Tunnocks34 · 19/02/2020 10:57

No. Although I wish I did.

What I actually believe happens is when our brain is dying, as were about to go, our neurones begin to misfire and we feel a deep sense of peace and what we associate with it. So for my great gran, she saw her mum. I’d love to believe her mum ‘came for her’ but actually I think her brain allowed her to visualise this before she died moments later

pigsDOfly · 19/02/2020 10:57

I would never mock someone for their beliefs but this is a discussion forum, hence there will be a discussion.

Little point on someone coming on here and saying 'I believe in God and heaven and hell' and no one giving a counter to that because they're afraid of hurting someone's feelings if they say that they don't believe.

The OP's question was 'Do you believe in Heaven'. My answer is 'no I don't, and neither do I believe in a God'. Frankly, I don't care if that is not the answer anyone on here wants to read.

Skyejuly · 19/02/2020 11:00

I had a near death experience and I felt extreme peace. I hope people are comforted by the fact many people do experience this peace. Poorly people would no longer feel pain anymore.

OutwiththeOutCrowd · 19/02/2020 11:03

Lofari, no one can take the possibility of that being the case away from you. And I say that as an atheist. Flowers

yellowallpaper · 19/02/2020 11:07

When I had a car accident in 2010 and I was hurtling towards the side of a lorry, I clearly thought I'm going to wake up dead, and everything will be black and there will be nothing. So I guess deep down I don't

SirChing · 19/02/2020 11:14

But this thread has been started in AIBU

Yes, well it hasn't always been a bear pit where people immaturely didn't give a damn about how they expressed things. People were forthright but with empathy and had the wit and intelligence to think before they wrote.

It's only now become acceptable to be a blunt as humanly possible, since people decided to be as blunt as humanly possible. It was never a rule. There was wit and warmth within the forthright opinions.

Anyway, this is derailing so I shall shut up.

MimiLaRue · 19/02/2020 11:15

Yes. For me, heaven is a place where God is. Hell is a place where God isn't.
God is love so even though I cant imagine what heaven looks like, I know its a good place and is essentially us going back to our "source".

SirChing · 19/02/2020 11:17

I want to believe. My son has a terminal illness. I have to believe there is somewhere amazing for him after this

I truly believe there is, and hope that when it is his time, that it's as peaceful and gentle as possible for both of you Flowers

TheSandman · 19/02/2020 11:29

I’m undecided but some posters on here who are saying you are just ‘worm food’ or ‘dust’ are a bit inconsiderate of people who have lost their darling children and are clinging to the hope they are happy somewhere and that they may be able to see them again one day.

I too have lost people I love. I get annoyed when people tell me they've gone to a 'better place' and 'we'll be reunited in heaven'. It's patronising codswallop and I feel like I'm being treated like a child - whilst, I might add, those of the same faith simultaneously tell me I won't be going to heaven because I don't believe in their particular brand of imaginary god/s. ...

Make your bleedin' minds up.

Yes, of course, it would be insensitive and crass to tell someone recently bereaved, to their face, that they are deluded and not ever going to be with their loved one/s in 'the afterlife'.

That''d be just plain rude. Cruel even.

But don't waltz into an adult, public discussion about belief in heaven and claim special privileges because of 'what you believe' or recent family history. Follow that path and no one would ever discuss anything ever again in case someone, somewhere got a wee bitty upset.

SirChing · 19/02/2020 11:41

Yes, of course, it would be insensitive and crass to tell someone recently bereaved, to their face, that they are deluded and not ever going to be with their loved one/s in 'the afterlife'

Honest question: how is it equally not as crass and insensitive to do that when the person's face happens to be on the other side of a screen? It isn't as if just because we can't see the person they don't exist.

Totally get what you mean about religious platitudes being patronising when you don't believe, though, and people have no right to say you will be going to hell. That's horrible.

mindproject · 19/02/2020 11:44

No.

If it did exist and you were allowed in for being a good/nice/kind person I would probably get in. If you got in solely for believing in God then I wouldn't. The criteria for admittance to heaven seems a bit odd, and strangely convenient.

CanIHaveATiaraPlease · 19/02/2020 11:49

Lofari Flowers

WikkiTikkiWoo · 19/02/2020 11:51

The problem is.. if you believe in the Christian heaven - where do non Christians go?! Where do those of us that eat shellfish, and have tattoos go? Or have things changed and everyone gets into heaven anyway?

Skyejuly · 19/02/2020 11:53

The fear factor is one factor that makes religion so well followed. People are scared of death and never seeing loved ones again. We shouldn't believe out of fear. People we have loved will always exist in our hearts.

MimiLaRue · 19/02/2020 11:55

We shouldn't believe out of fear

I agree and thats not why I believe. I dont think anything done out of "fear" can ever be truly genuine.

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 19/02/2020 12:00

@WikkiTikkiWoo

Well the Catholic church totally did away with the concept of 'Limbo' a few years back, so as well as tacitly admitting that these things are indeed entirely figments of the human imagination, it appears that we can also make the rules up as we go along, as and when they suit us. Convenient.

It's great. I can look forwards to going to a heaven I don't believe exists. Confused

TheSandman · 19/02/2020 12:05

Honest question: how is it equally not as crass and insensitive to do that when the person's face happens to be on the other side of a screen? It isn't as if just because we can't see the person they don't exist.

Good point. I guess because it's plain text, and remote. It adds a screen between participants in the conversation. It becomes more intellectual and less emotional.

In addition it becomes a lot harder to tell if people are lying. Or indeed being ironic, humorous, sarcastic etc. without having to stick those stupid emoticonny things on the end of every sentence.

Bugger me! I just had a (non religious) revelation! This is why J K Rowlings writes the way she does - where every other speech her characters utter is followed by the written equivalent of an emoticon - he typed enthusiastically... The kids she writes for are so used to being told what mood the words they're reading are supposed to taken as, that they have to have it spelled out for them. If you went through her books with a spellchecker and took out all the adverbs after "s/he said" the books would be incomprehensible to the average teenager.

SirChing · 19/02/2020 12:16

I honestly don't think a screen does make it more intellectual if it's something someone feels emotional about. Why would it? If I talk to someone through a window they can still hurt my feelings.

I think the person who it feels more remote for, is the person with little emotional investment in the subject. But it isn't really fair, surely, to expect the invested person to have the same level of detachment.

And because the screen is a barrier to context, doesn't that mean that we need to choose our words with even more care?

I just think that there is a presumption that just because some people aren't affected by things, others shouldn't be either. And the whole "if you can't take it, don't come on here" is sometimes true BUT why shouldn't we speak to people as if they were in front of us? Surely that's humane? Otherwise we are advocating for the right to be keyboard warriors who lose their humanity due to not being able to see a face. With technology use ever increasing, is that really what we want for our kids?

GoodbyeRosie · 19/02/2020 12:23

I think it is a pretty poor and upsetting concept to be honest.

I would hate to think of any relative missing us somewhere, as much as we miss them, and them be able to feel and see it When you think of children passing away, it becomes even more upsetting.

That's my opinion anyway.

thecatneuterer · 19/02/2020 13:15

@TheSandman very well said.

lynsey91 · 19/02/2020 13:31

I believe in life after death although I don't know what exactly it will be. I also believe I will be reunited with my loved ones and my precious pets.

I am sure as I can be although, obviously, cannot be absolutely certain. I hate the way posters that don't believe are always so absolutely certain they are right. They cannot be sure

restawhile77 · 19/02/2020 14:10

I hate that too, it kind of implies that we are stupid for believing. I do find it odd the concept of a closed mind without the benefit of the doubt.

TheSandman · 19/02/2020 15:13

And because the screen is a barrier to context, doesn't that mean that we need to choose our words with even more care?

Yes. And read what is written with more care too.