To think not everyone has somebody who would notice?

[Donkeykong2019]

I know I don't. People always suggest reaching out to a friend or family member but not everyone has someone and the constant reminded of not having someone is awful

OP if you need support please please reach out to your GP or Samaritan's.

Know what you mean, although I have family they are very much of the ‘stiff upper lip’ school of thought. I have heard them slag off anyone and everyone who has genuine problems as weak, attention seekers, lazy. Thankfully there are organisations, helplines, services that are there for people.

Happy Birthday Connie, sending you a birthday wish for a brilliant year ahead xx

LOADS of people have no-one. It’s a total tragedy.

Fb was full of people saying how they are 'there for anyone to talk to', yet these same people ignored me and changed the subject when I needed to talk. It's so sanctimonious. I don't have anyone to turn to either.

It’s all very well saying everyone has someone who will be there for them. In reality if you get that low then you really do not believe that anyone cares and just see yourself as a burden. People can throw out all these supportive quotes and posts but half of these people have not one compassionate bone in their bodies.

Im surrounded by lots of people but close to no one.
It's hard.
I have family to chit chat with but keep distancing myself from them and also friends, until they're good acquaintances. My issue is I'd rather knowingly he alone than disappointed by their behaviour. So once I've been slighted or let down, i back away.
My marriage broke down and none of my family have been any practical help. One, just one, has been my saviour, but they're almost a decade younger than me so I'm mindful not to weigh down a young adult or offload onto them. I cant believe the rest have been so unhelpful in what was the toughest 2yrs. I'm coming out the other side now, but have often wished for a minor affliction (small car crash, too dramatic?) that meant folks would rally round and physically help out for two weeks so i could have a break. If i just said i wasnt coping and could i have two weeks off, it'd never happen

Connie

Blackopal

I agree, I do have a large family and friends.

However, honestly I don't think any one of them has any understanding or inclination to understand what's beneath the veneer.
I think we are all just alone tbh.
You really aren't alone but that's maybe how you feel as a result of anxiety and/or depression. Try reaching out to your family and friends and tell them how you feel. You might be pleasantly surprised.

Sometimes people with problems hide it too well. It really doesn't doesn't mean family and friends don't care. I have a family member who had a breakdown which I was totally blindsided by. I would have preferred them to have reached out time before it got to that stage.

I think people are generally too wrapped up in their own lives and problems to devote much time to other people. I do think the 'lean on someone' message isn't particularly helpful for the reasons already mentioned. Call an organisation, see a therapist or your GP but don't expect people you know to step into the breach.

God, I can't even write how I feel here. I feel completely icey and empty.

Sorry, meant to add reading these posts makes me so sad.

At work I'm told what a tonic I am. Can put on a good act.

Shinyletsbebadguys

I really only have DP and DC close to me. DC obviously not appropriate , and DP I can talk to but he is the one person I dont want to worry or upset.
Your DP is probably the one person who wants you to be able to talk to them and wants to be supportive of you. Worrying about a partner is just part of loving someone. Telling them will probably be the best thing you can do.

I'm a mental health first aider and telling people in crisis to reach out to friends and family is definitely recommended. Not everyone has that Network I know but others don't reach out because they don't feel they can/don't think others would care. Their perception isn't always correct however

Doesnt always happen though Zagzig sometimes no-one rallies round..
I've just been really ill, still not fully recovered as ive had to battle with everyday tasks (am single) throughout it all..
The worst thing was i rang the doctor at one point, who wanted to see me urgently to check my heart, and she just couldnt believe i had no-one to get me to the surgery.. as i was too ill to get a bus, i couldnt get there and that was that.

I don't either. It's so hard. People around me would say they'd be there for me. But when it comes down to it, I'm alone.

I don't want to speak to the GP etc. There's no real point.

I think more people have nobody than we'd realise. I have less than 20 acquaintances and none of them are friends.

Connie222

I’ve had a very rough time recently. I thought I could speak to a friend; she was asking how I was. I was honest. She replied a few times and then ignored me for a week. Then posted a status on Facebook about being sick of other people’s problems as it was draining her. It was obviously about me from the comments.

First and Last time I will ever reach out to anyone.
If you have another friend or family member then reach out to them. Just because one person responded badly doesn't mean everyone will. If that status was about you (and it might not have been. You could just be assuming that because of your feeling low) then they aren't worth knowing.

Happy birthday. I hope you are enjoying the day.

I’ve been going through a tough time for a good while, often contemplated it. Resisted because I know it cause my adult sons damage. Solider only. Read all the stories of reach out to someone. Eventually I did and they didn’t even look up from their phone. I sat in silence then. Then they said ‘your draining’. Never again will I reach out. I was sad to read someone said the same to Caroline Flack. It hammers the point home that no one cares. You are very much on your own.

Yeah, lots of my friends have put on Facebook they are there for their friends in times of need, and I don't doubt they are. BUT it takes so much guts to talk to reach out and talk to someone about your problems.
I have a really lovely DH and a BFF who I have known for years, but I wouldn't dream of telling either of them how I really feel and how I am. This is no reflection on them, they are just not the right people. I do however have one newish friend who has given me so much support in recent difficult times. I think I've been able to open up to her as I can see so much of me in her it just feels okay. It takes so much trust to share difficult feelings and emotions. Xx

You are spot on..2 years ago I moved house to avoid and escape domestic emotional and financial abuse. Literally none of my 'friends' have ever checked in on me since. I have considered calling them out but really, what's the point?

I hate all this ‘talk to someone’ bollocks and ‘I care’ etc on Facebook. It’s such shit. The truth is for many people nobody does give a shit whether they reach out or not.

@NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite it’s not that simple. Yes these people have people around them that they could talk to. When you get into that mindset you find that you just cannot do it - you do not feel like you can talk to anyone and that you’re simply a burden.

@Connie222
Happy birthday