... about the cheese on toast?

[albertatrilogy]

I'll in bed. Problem compounded by tiredness and husband having woken me twice last night by loud weird choking coughs, after which I couldn't get back to sleep. (He's not I'll. Not sure what coughing was about.) I was working yesterday and will be working the next five days. He's retired. So because I'm so shattered I retreated to bed this morning and said l didn't feel up to coming down for lunch. When he offered to bring me something, I asked for a toasted cheese sandwich. ( We have a machine for doing toasties.) After ten minutes he game back with a plate that had two very greasy slices of cheese on toast on it. No knife and fork or paper napkin, so not really possible to eat in bed. So do I leave the bastard?

Did No one else clock the boss eating a donut with a knife and fork?!!

I doubt he was having coughing fits in the night to deliberately keep you awake or piss you off.

It’s cheese on toast, just pick it up with your hands & wash them after.

You're so tired, you can only eat a sealed sandwich in bed .

If your husband isn't downstairs muttering to himself about the overdramatic greasy mess wallowing in bed, he's a better person than I am.

What has happened to you is utterly horrific, of course, OP, but I am far more concerned with posters on this thread suffering from a sense of humour failure.

So yes, leave the bastard, in fact, shove the bugger straight under the patio, and may the rest of you bear in mind that whatever hell has befallen you, it won't be helped by bitching at a woman with melty greasy cheese related trauma.

Peace and love to you all. Apart from Mr Albertatrinity, who is a plonker.

If your husband isn't downstairs muttering to himself about the overdramatic greasy mess wallowing in bed, he's a better person than I am.

Cheese dripping down the edges of the toast sounds AMAZING. Send him round to make me some.
I'm sure it tastes better eaten when your fingers?

You’ve got a germ-ridden library book in your BED???
Urgh. 🤢😷

"There's melted cheese dripping all down the sides. So impossible to eat without getting oily fingers"

YANBU though. DH recently brought me fish and chips in bed. On a tray with a napkin and the ketchup in a little ramekin. I thought about asking for a fish knife but decided that would be too ungrateful and wanky. We have been married over twenty years, at the beginning he would have cheerfully dumped it in my lap still wrapped in the paper. How long have you been married @albertatrilogy - is it possible he just hasn't hit the required level yet?

PS cheese on toast is not as good as a sealed toastie as the sealed toastie corners are crunchy and the best bit, so YADNBU there either. But you might have burnt your chin on the hot cheese or is it that just me in which case he could also be wrong.

I'm going to make some cheese on toast now. I think with W. sauce.

@BecauseReasons & @TheNestedIf
shouldn't it be water pistols filled with Worcestershire sauce ?

Are you sure he doesn't have sleep apnoea OP?

Knife and fork? Are you Donald Trump.?

Grab an item of his clothing to use as a napkin.

To be honest you don’t really sound completely bedbound with illness. Perhaps a shower and a change of scenery is what you need.

I can't lie op, I'm feeling more sorry for your dh than you right now!

shouldn't it be water pistols filled with Worcestershire sauce ?

I'm happy with that as long as there's no danger of a piece of cheese on toast getting in the way.

I will, because I am a reasonable person, mention that if one has already gone too far and made a Welsh Rarebit, one may defile it further in any way they please.

Move over to his side of the bed. Eat delicious cheesy mess. Wipe fingers on sheets. Move back to your side.

I'd have sent him back downstairs to make an actual toasted cheese sandwich. (if you have a machine, he's got no excuse).

Should I bring my duelling pistol or my sword?

You hurl crackers and condiments - obviously.

Are the slices cut up into sections ~~ fold two together to simulate a toasted sandwich ~~ problem solved.

As to the library book in bed... this is why I never use the library, who knows where the books have been!

You are all Ratbags.

OP - YAB a tiny bit U. I know what you mean. You wanted the thing you wanted, and what was provided wasn't quite right. The sealed toastie would have been perfect. Although remember he probably wouldn't have got it quite right either ... As the toastie of your dreams is the toastie of YOUR dreams.

I hope you feel better soon.

Wipe your hands on his pillow. Job done.

Thoughts and prayers, OP flowers

Hahahahaha.

OP it's lovely to see how concerned you are about your DH's choking cough. Poor bugger lol.

If your husband isn't downstairs muttering to himself about the overdramatic greasy mess wallowing in bed, he's a better person than I am.

Me too

Did he serve it, as it always should be served, in it's purest naked form? Or did he pervert, corrupt and ruin it by putting other things on it such as those utter degenerates who pollute it with Worcestershire Sauce?

I completely agree. If he polluted it in any way, LTB.

It’s culinary abuse!

Is it the first time he has done this ? If so you could give him a second chance and ask him to bring some kitchen roll and a knife?

Otherwise HE’s TOAST!

I hope you feel better soon, OP.